“Don’t stand up.”
I angrily stand up. Hugo is preventing me from standing up. He overreacted even though I am already fine. They delayed our supply to the other barrio due to my fever. It can’t be postponed until the next day. The deliverers need to go home because they still have work to do.
“You can lie there. Don’t you understand the word ‘fine’? I’m fine, you have nothing to worry about.” Irritated, I told him as I took from my bag the medicine he had given me to speed up the disappearance of my fever.
I was about to go out to chat outside with the elder when he pulled me back. It was early in the morning and later we would walk to the next barrio. I feel good, my resistance is not weak, so I recovered quickly.
I would have dropped his hand that was holding me when he spoke, which surprised me. I didn’t expect him to say that.
“I am sorry.”
I’m not looking at him. I didn’t even remove his warm palms. We were silent for a few seconds before I spoke and removed his hand that was holding me. Even though my movements were weak, the creak of the wood we were stepping on still rang out.
“Sorry is more than simply a word. When we apologize, we should consider what we did wrong. You don’t apologize solely to make the situation fine. Sorry is a way of expressing, ‘Give me a chance, and I’ll correct what I’ve done wrong.’ I hope you may understand the actual significance of it one day.” I took the slipper and left him thereafter. I said that. Even after I left, I didn’t pay attention to his reaction.
“Oh! Adele! Are you okay now, child?” An old woman approached me with a broom. She helps me to sit next to the elders. She also talks.
I just notice that those who are in middle age and teenagers are less noticeable. I only saw them when they were coming down the mountain while carrying wood that was supposed to be cut down to light a fire.
“I’m fine. My fever isn’t that bad. I’m embarrassed and we delayed going to the other barrio.”
“It’s nothing. Is Hugo okay now? How is he? Last night we were also worried because he had a fever, but he still insisted on watching over you even though I told him I would watch over you. I’m Lenlen anyway.” She smiled at me and began to sweep the leaves that had fallen from the trees.
My eyes widened. Is it the reason his palms were hot, and he was weak? I ignored that because I thought it was normal for him.
I ran inside and saw Hugo lying on our bed while sleeping peacefully. Tears began to fall from my eyes. I couldn’t understand what he wanted. I can’t stand how he feels for me, there is a day he wants me but there is a day I feel he is away from me.
I approached where he was lying, then sniffed because it blocked my nose from crying. He heard me, so he opened his eyes. It was as if I were going crazy crying as if someone had died.
He wiped my eyes with his warm finger. “Why are you crying?” I cried, even more, when he asked. If I acted, it was as if he was seriously ill.
“Why didn’t you say you were sick?” I slapped his arm lightly. He is sick so I don’t want to hit him hard so that can be the reason for his fever to get worse.
“You’re already sick. I am not going to bother you. Then one more thing, I don’t feel bad. I’m just tired of taking care of you.” I know his last line was just a joke, but I looked at him with irritated eyes. That doesn’t feel like I’ve been offended. I just show him that his joke wasn’t funny.
He laughed, then coughed. “I’ll rest for a while. If you want, you can go outside and talk with some people. You will enjoy chatting with them.” His eyes are already closing up.
As his eyelids slowly locked, I stood up. Not to talk, but to get him some lukewarm water. I will take care of him. I will treat him like a real wife.
I thought it would be easy to light wood to have a fire. I’m embarrassed to ask people because they might think I’m ignorant.
I thought I could no longer heat the water, I was surprised when the last of the matches caught fire on the wood I had wrapped in plastic. I immediately took the kettle filled with water to heat it. When I put it, the fire suddenly got a little stronger sticking it to my finger.
When I was shocked, I almost let go of the kettle, but luckily I clutched it tightly. I washed my finger in water to ease the ache, but it remained red and the black circle was visible. I hadn’t realized I’d been there a long time. I had just heard the kettle whistle, so I grabbed the towel and basin I had prepared earlier.
When I entered, he was still asleep. I first wiped his arm to remove the heat. Next, I lifted his head a little to wipe his neck. While wiping him, I saw a tattoo on the back of his neck. I didn’t notice that then because maybe it was too small. But when I look at it, it’s a numerical number. I would have watched it longer when his head moved. Even when I finished wiping him, he still didn’t wake up until someone knocked on the door.
“Good Morning Ms. Adele. We need to get back to the city later. May I know when the medicines and food will be distributed?” The driver of supplies.
I looked at Hugo, who was peacefully sleeping. I turned to the man again and answered him. “Let’s go. Let’s take it, come with me.”