He struggles to get the key from his pocket, but eventually the door creaks open. He grabs me again and kisses me as he walks me backwards into our suite.
We’ve danced for hours, kissed for hours, and now we’re home I can’t wait one minute longer to have him.
He turns me and unzips my dress, letting his lips linger on my neck. He unhooks my lingerie and it falls to the floor, leaving me in nothing but my black sky-high stilettos. His hungry eyes drop down my body when he turns me back to face him, and then they rise up to my face.
“I want you,” I whisper. “Please. I can’t wait any longer.”
He loses control and tears his suit jacket over his shoulders, throwing it on the floor.
I slip out of my shoes and pull back the covers on the bed, laying myself down and placing my head on the pillows.
His eyes hold mine as he slowly unbuttons his shirt and removes his pants.
My eyes drop down his body, to the broad, muscular chest, his rippled abdomen, down to the thick, hard cock hanging heavily between his legs. I can see every vein on it, and pre-ejaculate drips from its end.
Heaven.
“How do you want me?” He leans over to kiss me.
I cup his face. “On top of me, holding me close.” We kiss. “I need it slow tonight, baby.” He closes his eyes and his lips take mine.
He’s right here with me. He feels it, too. Whatever this is.
Julian moves over the top of me. My open legs cradle his large body, and I smile at him as my hands roam up and down his broad back. He slides in slowly and we both close our eyes, moaning blissfully.
Our kisses are tender, his cock is deep, and in this moment, I feel so unbelievably close to him. He slowly pulls out and slides back in. “Fucking hell,” he groans. “You’re going to be the fucking death of me.”
Steam fills the bathroom.
I have no idea what time it is, but we’ve just made love for hours, and now we’re sitting in a deep, hot bath together. It’s like we don’t want to go to sleep because our night will be over. He lies back and I’m lying on top of him, my weary head on his chest. He rubs his face back and forth across my forehead as he holds me close.
I feel closer to him than I should.
“How did you lose your virginity?” I smile to myself.
“Oh God, don’t remind me of that balls up.” He tips the hot water over my shoulders. “Literally.”
I giggle.
“Janika Merris.”
I smile against his skin, already knowing I’m going to like this story.
“She was older than me. She wanted me badly.” He hesitates. “She offered me a head job at our school dance.”
“What?” I giggle as I look up at him in surprise. “How old were you?”
“Sixteen.”
I shake my head before I put it back down on his warm, strong chest.
“She sucked my dick at the back of the school hall.”
I chuckle as I imagine the scene he’s setting.
“And then she had sex with me as my two friends watched on.”
I sit up in shock. “What?” My mouth falls open. “Your friends watched you lose your virginity?”
He smiles and pulls me back to his chest. “Yep, and then she had sex with them, too. We all lost our virginity on the same night to the same girl.”
I burst out laughing. “Oh my God. That’s the worst virginity story ever. She’s such a slut.”
“Appalling.” He winces. “Funnily enough…” His voice trails off.
“Funnily enough, what?”
“I’ve never told anyone that story before.”
“Good. You shouldn’t.” I laugh.
I can feel him smile above me, and he kisses my forehead, tightening his arms around me.
“Do you still see those friends?” I ask.
“They’re still my two best friends. Sebastian and Spencer. We see each other all the time.”
“Well, I suppose you do have a special bond now.”
He chuckles. “Yeah, it’s a funny story that we often discuss when drunk
We let the silence linger for a moment longer.
“Jules, can I ask you something?”
He softly kisses me on the temple. “What?”
“Why the skits?” He stays silent.
“When you invite me here on these nights, why do you want me to dress up and not be here as myself?”
He pauses for a moment before he eventually answers.
“Because the beautiful woman who lives in my house and cares for my children is too good for me.”
I listen in silence.
“I couldn’t fuck her the way that I fuck you.”
I frown against his skin, weighted down by his fingertips as they trail across my back.
“Why couldn’t you fuck her like you fuck me?” I whisper.
“Because she’s the kind of girl you fall in love with, and I’m not wired to love. I’d only let her down.”
My eyes tear up. Good God, he is broken.
The two of us become lost in our own thoughts and I know I need to lighten the mood. “That girl who lives in your house is frigid and would never fuck your friends anyway.” I look up at him.
He smiles and kisses me softly.
“You should stay away from her.” I smile against his lips.
“I intend to, don’t worry. She’s the devil in disguise.”
I giggle, and we kiss again.
And just for tonight, all is right in my world.
It’s now Friday, and Julian is due home at any moment. He’s taken the afternoon off to come with me to the meeting at the school. I’m looking forward to what this teacher is going to say to us both. Hopefully it’s not as bad as I’m imagining.
I put some things away in Sammy’s room, and I walk down the hall and glance into Julian’s bedroom, frowning when I see something out of place.
There’s a book, upside down, left open on his bedside table. I walk in and pick it up.
When Children Grieve.
For adults, to help children deal with death.
My eyes instantly fill with tears and I sit on his bed with the book in my hand.
Sadness engulfs me. I wish a book like this never had to be written. I wish nobody ever needed it. How do you ever teach your children to live without their mother?
I sit for a moment with tears in my eyes.
They’ve been through so much. I imagine them at the funeral, and then at the wake. Willow would have been ten, Sammy only three. He probably doesn’t even remember her. I get a vision of them all dressed up, of Samuel in a little suit in his fathers’ arms. Julian would have had to organize the funeral.
Was she buried or cremated? Where is her grave?
Has the house been silent and sad ever since?
I hear his car come up the drive. I carefully place the book back on his bedside table and run down the stairs to meet him.
I want to tell him everything is going to be okay.
But she wasn’t my wife, I’m not grieving, and it’s not okay because she’s never coming back.
For the first time, I can understand why he’s like the way he is, so closed off to the world and afraid to get too close to anyone ever again.
The door opens, and he appears in front of me, smiling warmly. He’s wearing a grey suit with a white tie, looking like everything but a man swallowed in grief.
“Hello, Miss Brielle.”
My heart skips a beat. I just want to throw my arms around his neck and hug him. “Hi,” I breathe.
“You ready to go?”
I nod, but I hesitate. This really isn’t any of my business.
“What?” he asks, sensing my need to say something.
“You’re doing a really good job.”
He frowns, waiting for me to expand.
“With the kids. You’re doing a really good job with the kids. You’re a great father.”
He smiles softly, offering his thank you in silence. “Let’s go.”
We’re sitting outside the principle’s office waiting to be called in. Julian is next to me, his hands linked in front of him, staring straight ahead. We went out for breakfast this morning and made love again. Scratch that. He fucked me like there was no tomorrow, and his vow to make it impossible for me to walk for a week may actually come true. After, he kissed me goodbye and went to work, slipping back into his cold, indifferent persona.
It’s like he’s two different people. The man I fuck in the hotel is warm, sexy and tender.
The man I live with is reserved, cold, and he doesn’t show his emotions at all.
I’m not sure how to reach out to him at home, or if I even want to.
He came back to pick me up for the meeting we’re here for regarding Willow, and now it’s like last night didn’t even happen.
Did it?
Did I imagine the whole beautiful thing?
The office door opens. “Please, come in.” The principal smiles.
“Julian Masters,” he asserts as he shakes the two men’s hands.
“I’m the principle, and this is our school counsellor.”
I smile and take a seat next to Julian.
“So, Miss Johnston, last time we spoke you were concerned about Willow and how she is getting on at school.”
“Yes.” I smile as I clutch my purse in my lap.
“Well.” The counsellor raises his eyebrows, seeming uncomfortable. “I’ve had a meeting with each of her teachers throughout the week and, unfortunately, I’ve heard some things that have left me feeling very uncomfortable.”
“Such as?” Julian asks sharply.
“Willow.” He grimaces. “Doesn’t actually appear to have any close friends at the moment.”
My face falls. “What?’
“Since her only friend left nine months ago, she sits alone at lunch and doesn’t really mix with anyone.”
Julian frowns. “What do you mean?”
“She goes to the library alone.” He shrugs. “I was unaware of this until the teachers started asking other students questions.”
I squeeze my hands together on my lap. Oh no.
“Is there a problem?” Julian asks.
The counsellor frowns. “Apparently, and this is just what I’ve heard and hopefully it may not be true, there is a problem. There’s name calling going on, for a start. Everyone calls her Weird Willow.”
Julian frowns.