At nine in the morning, I packed my bag, preparing to fly back to Chicago. Kim wasn’t coming home with me, she’d be back in about three weeks to take care of her official move to Missouri. She’ll haul all her stuff here once she finds a permanent place to live. Yes, Kim will be settling in Missouri, we’ll be living apart.
I know it’s hard for both of us. But no matter what, life must go on. My education in Chicago is also coming to an end. Maybe I’ll find a job in Missouri, meet Kim again and it’s possible that we’ll live under the same roof again.
“Make sure you don’t leave anything behind,” she said as she picked up her car keys.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not Kimberly Zhao Chan.”
The girl groaned a little in annoyance, but also chuckled. I don’t know how she’ll fare now that I’m not around to bring her things that she left behind. I hope her clumsy nature disappears soon so that she won’t trouble herself and others.
I followed Kim to her car. “By the way, sorry about Fred. I still can’t believe he’s your boss,” I said. Kim glanced at me as she fastened her seat belt. “I mean, what kind of boss doesn’t hang out with his employees and instead approaches a strange woman who’s alone?”
Kim started driving her red car. “Actually, he’s not the kind of boss you think he is. He’s my editor, so technically I’m under him. I’m sure he won’t bother me.”
“Gosh, I still feel guilty,” I sighed. I leaned my back and head back, as if giving in to this feeling.
“There’s no need to worry that much. My work won’t be affected.”
I bit my inner lip. That’s not what I meant. I was going to worry if what I did would affect Kim’s work, but that’s not what I meant. It wasn’t that I felt guilty for sleeping with Kim’s boss, it was that I slept with Fred on the basis of proving that I could get back at Marco for the things he’d done to me before.
Talking about this made me remember something. I met Marco again at the party. And Marco knew that the people who partied there last night were reporters.
I wanted to ask Kim, she might know something. However, it’s been a dozen minutes, but I still can’t come up with anything. Also I suddenly couldn’t find another topic of conversation. My brain seemed to be blocked by Marco. Every outlet in my mind was always Marco there, standing tall, challenging me to think of something unrelated to him.
“Kim, I just asked ….” And this is where we start. “Is it possible that any of your coworkers are named Marco?”
Kim’s forehead wrinkled. “Why?” She turned to me.
“Just answer,” I pleaded. Kim began to relax her expression, but still looked at me intently. Until I realized what she was doing wasn’t right. “Look at the road, Kim!”
The girl finally came to her senses. “Oh, sorry.” Even though she was staring ahead, Kim still seemed to be thinking. She turned the car around the corner. “As far as I remember, there wasn’t any, but there could be a Marco I don’t recognize.”
I exhaled tiredly, uselessly. “I can’t think of anything.”
“Who is Marco? Your mysterious savior? Oh! Did you possibly meet him last night? Wait, at the party?”
“You’re right about everything.”
“Then how did you end up sleeping with my boss instead of your mysterious man?”
I let out a long groan. “It’s quite a complicated story.”
Kim shook her head, equally perplexed. “You’re here,” she said then. She stopped the car, got out and brought my bag.
She also joined me in waiting for my flight. I had told her to go back and rest, considering she had just gotten home at three in the morning, but Kim refused. Actually, I predicted it.
“Leanne ….” Kim called out suddenly from her seat beside me, her gaze straight ahead. I mumbled in response. “It’s obviously none of my business and obviously this is all your decision, but if you want to get back into a relationship with a man, Mr. Collins is a good person. He’s a good man.”
“I’m not a good person.” Marco’s words from last night suddenly flashed through my mind. I shook my head quickly, pushing the image away. After what Kim had said, I could now clearly see the line of difference between Marco and Fred.
“I haven’t thought about it,” I replied, obviously lying. I felt too attached to Marco. If… if I had met Fred first… if I had met him with an empty heart that wasn’t filled with another man, I wouldn’t have left Fred alone in the hotel room after I had sex with him. I would have stayed there, curled up next to him, falling asleep with him until morning.
“I saw you this morning,” Kim said, leaving me both surprised and confused.
“Saw what?”
Kim shifted her seat, becoming crooked and facing me slightly. Her hand reached out for mine, grasping it warmly. And somehow I became nervous. Kim’s gaze and gestures were quite different than usual. This was the serious Kim, who had thrown away all her cheerful and playful elements.
“Did you have that dream again last night?”