I shake my head in disgust. “If anything were to happen with us, it would have to be like we’d just met. I don’t know you romantically. I need some time to think this over.”
He smiles. “Okay.”
“I mean it. I don’t know what’s going to happen. I can’t give you any guarantees.”
“Okay.” He holds his glass up. “A toast.”
I put my glass to his.
“To starting again.”
I clink my glass with his.
His eyes glimmer with something I haven’t seen before. A naughtiness. “Can I stay over tonight?”
“No.” I smirk. “You cannot.”
* * *
I stand in the café and look at the menu board.
It’s Friday, and after the longest week in history, I start my vacation today after work.
I haven’t seen or heard from Nathan since our dinner date. I know I asked for space but I thought he would have at least called me or something.
“What’s good here?” a familiar, deep voice asks. I glance over to see Nathan standing beside me, also staring up at the board, totally entranced by the selection. “It’s my first day here.” he says.
My eyes flicker to him in question.
“I want a do over,” he says. “I want to go back to the day that we met. I want to start again. Give me the chance to be the man you want me to be.”
I smile softly. I can’t believe he’s doing this. My eyes drop to the floor, and I know that it’s now or never.
Do I want to see where this goes or not? I force a smile, I know that it’s something I can’t walk away from without at least exploring our options. Nathan’s made it quite clear that he’s struggling with our platonic friendship, and if my jealousy over that other woman is anything to go by. So am I.
I exhale heavily. Here goes nothing. I may live to regret this.
“It’s your first day?” I ask. “Mine, too.”
A smile crosses his face when he realizes I’m playing along. “Really? Where did you move from?”
“Florida. And you?”
“Vermont, although I studied in New York.”
“Do you know anyone here?” I ask as we shuffle forward in the line.
His eyes hold mine. “Nobody that matters.”
I smile softly.
He holds out his hand to shake mine. “I’m Nathan.”
“Hi, Nathan, I’m Eliza. I think I’m going to have the turkey on rye,” I say.
He nods as he peruses the choices.
“Next,” the lady calls. Nathan steps forward. “Can I please have two lasagnes and salads?”
I drop my head to hide my smile, and my heart swells. He remembered what we ate that first day.
“Drinks?” the woman mutters, uninterested.
“No, Nathan, I’ll get mine.”
“You can buy my lunch tomorrow. Then I can have something to look forward to.”
I smile up at the beautiful man beside me. He remembers everything from our first meeting. He pays the lady, and we walk over to a table to sit down.
“Do you want to go out with me tonight?” he asks as he puts salt and pepper on his lasagne.
“Like, as friends?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “Like a date.”
My eyes hold his, and I know that this is it: the defining moment where I find out what I’m made of. “I’m willing to try.”
“That’s all I’m asking for.” He smiles softly.
“Where do you want to go?” I ask.
He picks up my hand and kisses the back of it. “Anywhere with you.”
Eliza
I knock on the door and stick my head around. “I’m out of here.”
Henry looks up and smiles. “Have a great vacation.”
I hunch my shoulders in excitement. “That’s the plan.”
“Where are you going again?”
“Majorca. We leave in the morning.”
“You going with your boyfriend?” He frowns.
“Ah, yes.” That sounds weird. Is Nathan my boyfriend now? I raise my eyebrows in surprise, the concept mind blowing. “Yes, with Nathan.”
“Okay.” His eyes hold mine. “Have a great time. I must say, I’m very jealous.”
I chuckle, and with one last wave, I rush out of the door. I power walk to the elevator as I make an internal list of what I need, I have so much to do before Nathan gets to my house tonight and I haven’t even started packing yet. I need to get to my laser appointment, and then I want to buy that other swimsuit in red. I also want to pick up some new date dresses and lingerie.
Nerves dance in my stomach. Lingerie… for Nathan. I exit the building and step into the street. The sun is just going down, and I walk up the street toward my beauty therapist.
I don’t know what’s going to happen between the two of us, but I do know that I’m going to give it my best shot.
I’m bringing out the big guns. I want him to see me in a new light and to be new and exciting for him. I want to do things he hasn’t seen me do and wear things he hasn’t seen me wear before.
All the things I save for the men I’m dating.
In our friendship Nathan is bossy, but in a relationship, I don’t want to be mousy and submissive. I want him to know how much I love being in control and intimate, too. I love sex as much as anyone-more than anyone, probably.
I exhale heavily as I power down the busy sidewalk…. The thought of having sex with him is terrifying, nerves dance in my stomach at just the thought of it. I imagine us fumbling around in bed, and how I’m probably going to have to take the reins the first few times until he gets the hang of it.
He doesn’t know about vaginas.
“Oh God.” I wince. I feel my skin heat with perspiration as I imagine that moment.
It will be momentous, that’s for sure. I just hope it’s for the right reasons.
Nathan said that he didn’t know how his body would work with a woman but it worked with hers, and it has me secretly freaking out.
What if his body doesn’t work with mine? What if we get to that crucial moment and he can’t get it up?
I will die-literally die. Like dead in the fucking ground.
Suddenly, I am banged hard in the shoulder by a passing man. “Ouch!” he cries. “Watch where you’re going.”
“Sorry,” I call as I turn toward him. “I was distracted.”
I begin to rush again. I wasn’t lying. I am distracted by all things Nathan Mercer.
I’m nervous and anxious and excited and nervous, triple nervous actually.
Somehow, I don’t think this vacation is going to be as relaxing as I once thought it was.
I’m well aware that this could be a complete fucking disaster.
I stare at my open suitcase on my bed, and I run through what I will need: underwear, dresses, swimsuit, shoes, hat, sweater, jeans… umm, what else?
Lingerie.
My stomach rolls. Lingerie is code for sex.
Fuck, I really can’t imagine having sex with him. We are so familiar with each other, it seems foreign. I get a vision of his beautiful body, and my insides clench. I’ve looked at Nathan’s body so many times over the years and wondered what it could do. I guess I’m about to find out.
Of course, that’s if it works with mine…. gah, why do I keep worrying about that?
I begin to fold my clothes at double pace to try and take my mind off of worrying.
Deep down, I know why I’m nervous. It’s because this means something. I really want it to work between us. The more I’ve thought about it, the more it makes sense, and the more excited I become.
I love Nathan. He knows me better than anyone else and he still wants me. He’s the perfect male. Handsome, smart, with a beautiful body, but it’s his heart I adore. He cares for me like nobody else.
I glance at the clock and see it’s 9:00 p. m. He worked late and then went home to pack his suitcase. He’s going to be here soon. I better take a shower.
Half an hour later, I’m showered and wearing my standard pajamas of a white camisole with spaghetti straps. But tonight, I decide to wear my pink silk boxer shorts. It seems weird wearing just panties around him now. He’s seen it before.
Stop it.
I hear the key in the door, and my stomach drops. I close my eyes…
Here we go.
He comes into view and gives me a slow, sexy smile. “Hi, there.”