Then she sneezed two times, sniffed in some tears and then fetched some items which had fallen off her thighs. I think she was being careful not to smear her makeup. Or maybe she thought if she broke down, she wouldn’t be able to pass much information.
She showed me items she fetched from her thighs and without questioning me, went on: “I want to say something about these items” . You wonder what those items were? They were Cameron’s trinkets and gold chains–the ones I stole, so I could sell in case Cameron threw us out, so we’d not starve, or in case mom divorced Cameron and her job wasn’t sustaining, or she could not go to work because she has to rest. The expensive stolen objects I kept in the soil under the tile, in my room, precisely under my wardrobe. It was meant for our future sustainability. I stole them on one of the days mom had me pack Cameron’s ironed clothing’s to his room. He was not there, so I dropped his clothes on the bed, and stole the objects from his drawer and boxes.
“These..”, she continued, “are Cameron’s chains and trinkets. This also is his bangle. You don’t have to say anything, darling. I know you took them and hid them.. I’m sorry for going through your things but I needed to see what you do, when you stay alone in this room. I saw a diary…” She said and brought out one of my two diaries. I gently snatched it from her and hung my head in shame.
“I didn’t read it, Ariana” she said and I raised my head.
“Really?” I asked, relieved. I didn’t want anyone to read that book. Even me don’t go back reading it after writing in it. In a way and strangely, the content therein was meant to be documented, not read.
“I want us to have a mother and daughter talk. I won’t go reading your diary behind your back. I would rather you talk to me, and I talk to you. We are always around each other” she said and stared into my eyes. It was intense. I felt a strong connection just by looking at her eyeballs. This woman was indeed my mother.
“I don’t want you to steal for us. In fact, stealing from Cameron is the worst thing to do, even though I know you have the best intentions.
Ariana, I don’t want your little mind worrying about adult things” she said and tears started to roll down her face. “You don’t have to worry about how we’ll survive. We will. Cameron is not God, and I’m not a lazy woman. I’ll work. Don’t worry at all please” she said and embraced me, her body shaking with sobs. I just patted her back and listened to her.
“Please return these things back to his drawer before he returns, okay?”
I nodded. It was the best I could do. She stopped crying after a while and cheered up. “Now go and return them. I’ll wait for you. We still have many things to talk about” she smiled at me. I got up and went away with those expensive jewelries. On my way to Cameron and mom’s room, I went up to Mike.
“Is everything fine?” He asked. He was still waiting in the living room.
“Yes Mike. I’ll talk to you tomorrow please” I said. For now, mom needs me. I thought. He nodded. He was so understanding.
“Call me if you need any help, okay?” He said and got up. “Your mom has my number, and you can come to my place anytime”
“Sure” i said and hugged his feet. He hugged me back, like a father hugs a daughter he loved.
“Goodnight, my little child.” he said smiling all the way out of the house. “I’ll be the first to say good morning tomorrow” he said. I blushed. Then I shut the door tightly
after him. I felt good. It felt good to be able to control life, even as a kid. I was too smart to be seven. It felt good to be loved by him, even if he was not my biological father.
I returned those items and went back to mom who spread her arms waiting for me. I went into them for a warm hug. It felt good. I hadn’t been happier in months.
“That’s good, darling. Promise me you won’t steal anything again?”
“I promise” I said. She smiled and kissed my cheek. “That’s my girl”
I wanted to ask her why she was all dressed up when she said, “I am having a day out tomorrow with a friend in town. So I am checking out some cool outfits I got online. That’s why I’m dressed like this. I’ll be out from morning till evening.
You’ll stay with the Hawkins, okay? Not anywhere else, please?”
“Sure mom.. the Hawkins” i replied. “Mom, where are you going to?” I asked ecstatically. “Can you take me along too?” I whined
“No baby, you know you have to go to school. Besides, it’s an adult’s hangout. I’m hanging out with a friend. We wanna spend some time together. I’ll introduce him to you soon” she said blushing. Her face was full of joy just like it was, whenever a particular man called her, ever since Cameron left home. He was someone she was seeing. I wondered what he’d be like. My soon-to-be new father.
“Okay”.
That night, she cuddled me to sleep in my medium sized gorgeous bed, and kissed my cheek several times. One of the statements she muttered while we slept was, “When you grow up, you’ll understand some many things you do not understand now. And I hope you’ll forgive me”
I wondered what she meant by “I hope you’ll forgive me”. But I was at peace with my mind after returning the stolen jewelries.
The night was rough because mom woke up two times in the midnight complaining of back aches. I helped her massage her back with my little hands, even though she didn’t want me to stay awake because of her.