Moments later, we were both naked in bed, one of Kasan’s arm tucked beneath my head with his fingers playing with the strands of my hair while the other held me closer by the waist.
This endlessly awkward silence, awkward position and awkward proximity were all getting me flustered for some reason but I was too tired to even complain. It’s pathetic of me to even be flustered at all considering all the things we just did, but then again, his body felt so incredibly warm and cozy against mine. I don’t think I wanna move anytime soon and I couldn’t if I wanted to either. His hold was unbreakable and my legs were practically jelly!
When was the last time I’ve been so cuddly with any other guy than Kasan?
From what I recall… never…
They were always simply fuck buddies, nothing more. But I guess taking things further this time wasn’t such a bad idea where this is concerned. He’s like a big fluffy bear!
“Just so you know…” As expected, Kasan spoke first, his fanning breaths seeping heat into my skin, “… if you ever want anything, say maybe getting rid of a useless family member…. you can always just say the word. I’d do anything for my sexy mate, you know that right?”
I scowled. He wasn’t exactly hiding the fact that he was hinting towards Lucas, was he?
I’d rather be the mature one and ignore those words than have another argument with this persistent twat.
“What’s a mate?” I asked, a annoyed expression portrayed on my face. I wasn’t exactly interested in knowing but anything is better than not speaking at all. The silence is too awkward.
“This isn’t the first time you’ve called me that and we’re not animals.”
“No, its not like that.” He chuckled, idly wrapping a few strands of my hair around his index finger then unfurling. His movements were sluggish somewhat… and that was a first. I mean, I’ve never seen him looking tired or sleepy after sex and it isn’t even nighttime. What has he been doing these past few days?
“It just means you’re the most important person to me. I will never intentionally hurt you and I want to be by your side always. You don’t mind, do you babe?” He suddenly dipped down to peck my lips and grinned as I flushed a darker shade.
W-What?
He’s grinning but what’s with this grossly serious atmosphere?
He’ll never hurt me? Most important? By my side always? Me?
He said he wanted to stay together til whenever not too long ago so that’s not a first. And besides, I was pretty sure he was bluffing with that one. But most important person? And with such a serious tone? Firstly, we’re not a married couple so why does it sound like he’s devoting his life to me?! How can he say that so easily?!
“A-Are you seriously head over heels for me?”
He didn’t make any move to answer and neither did he seem suprised by the question. He just simply stared blankly over at me.
But anyone could tell that his silence was a big fat ‘YES’ in disguise…
Realization jerked me upwards in the bed before I could choke on my own spit. But then without warning, his arm that was draped around my waist forced me back downwards and I flopped unto the bed once more with my eyes practically bulging out of my head.
“Why are you making that face? Wasn’t it obvious? I told you I liked you ages ago. Now can we sleep? My eyes feel heavy.” Scooting closer, he rolled me unto my side and stuffed his head into my chest, snuggling between my breasts. “You talk too much.”
I’m the one who talks too much?…!
I pushed him off me and stretched my index and thumb over to catch hold of his eyelids the second they began to droop, ruthlessly keeping them spread apart. “Like is one thing, but being head over heels is another. I mean, how can you make yourself seem so… eerr… vulnerable is it? No humanlike?… ugh I don’t even know how to spit it out, but I’m saying you’re the stupidest person alive… basically.”
I was blabbering and there’s no way he couldn’t tell that I was flustered, because his lips seemed to stretch the more I embarrassed myself.
I frowned. “Stop with that grin, Kasan. Aren’t you an infamous devil? You’re supposed to be a dirtbag… even to me and all those stupid mobsters downstairs. I honestly thought you’d be the type to kill any and everyone over simple things like spilt milk, but you’re so chummy with us all that it’s getting suspicious. Where’s the devilish mobster everyone’s afraid of?”
He shrugged. “I’m devilish when I need to be… not when it comes to you…” Slapping my fingers away from his eyes, he leaned in and before I could even register his movements, he quickly gave me another sloppy, half-assed kiss then flopped back unto the pillow with that stupid grin still on his lips.
I laid there silently and watched in complete and utter astonishment as his eyelids slowly drooped until they fully covered his ebony orbs.
Was all that… another confession? A deeper confession should I put it?
For some stupid reason, my chest was thumping like crazy and even my skin was suddenly hotter than fire. Why on earth did he have to go and say that?
Countless dimwits have confessed to me and while theirs was a good reason never to see them again, Kasan’s just made me feel somewhat warm and fuzzy inside to the point where I actually felt like grinning smugly.
What the fuck is up with me?
Moments of pondering passed afterwards, and I was still mostly out of it. Kasan, however, was deep in sleep… well atleast I think he is.
Did I crack his heart with no effort? Well… that’s amusing. I guess that’s why he was all up in my family business and was so hell-bent on impressing me.
“Are you sleeping?” I flicked his forehead softly and breathed a low sigh of relief when he didn’t move an inch.
He’s sleeping…. thankfully.
I took the chance to snuggle closer to his heat until both my arms were practically being squished between us. I stared up at him, my eyes taking in his appearance as he slept soundly. He looked peaceful in his sleep…. and maybe a tad bit cute too with his hair flying all over the place.
“You’re saying you fell for my charms after just a few not-so-awesome days of dating? That’s bullshit.” I laughed at him quietly. “It’d be wayyy nicer if my brother took a few more months to wake up and maybe if your chaotic men also weren’t here…. Yeah, our date was spoiled because of them all anyway.” Before I knew it, my lips tugged into a small smile. “I guess you can be really really really really really likable at times…”
“I guess you really really really really really like me then, huh?”
Eh???
My smile dropped in an instant and I quickly shuffled to get away from him, my embarrassment at its peak. If it weren’t for his arm around my waist, I probably would’ve rolled right off the fucking bed with no regrets.
Anything would’ve been better than staring up at his now smug-looking face.
“I’m not going to tease you.” He chuckled, pulling me back in place. “I’m too sleepy for that.”
Despite his words, I kept my face tucked into his chest where he couldn’t see me.
“Whatever.”
But what am I even doing hiding my face? It’s not like I said anything stupid, did I? I already mustered up my almost non-existent courage and told him that I liked him that time when he was being all sulky and puffy!
And moreover, how can I fuck him day and night but can’t say something as basic as ‘i like you’ nor lay beside him for more than a second without getting flustered…!?
Who even am I? This is so not me!
If I keep this up, he’s undoubtedly gonna get annoyed. And then once he gets annoyed, he’s not gonna give a damn shit about me anymore. And then when he doesn’t give a damn anymore, he’s gonna dump me. And then when he dumps me, my pride will drop to fucking the floor.
My first time getting dumped? I can’t even imagine it.
Clara, get your shit together!
I shouldn’t be embarrassed! I shouldn’t be embarrassed! I shouldn’t be embarrassed!!!
… Or am I taking this too deep?
“Mhmm.” He hummed and I finally peeked upwards to look at him. “But in regards to my men staying here, they’re for your protection. I won’t be able to kick them out for a while… sadly.”
“My protection from what?”
“It’s nothing major so you don’t need to care. What you need to care about is you and your stupid brother. Tomorrow, we’re going downstairs whether you like it or not. You asked me to keep him alive so you should be willing to face him. You even threatened me, Clara.”
“I threatened you?” I pointed at myself then at him. “Stop being so dramatic.”
“…’I won’t ever forgive you’. Didn’t you say that?”
“That’s not a threat, doofus. I only said that cuz you were going all beserk. Anyway, I’m not going out. Be a good little boyfriend for once and don’t tell me what to do.”
He laughed. “So you’re only a good girl when we’re fucking? If you don’t do as I say, you’re not getting any dick. Take note of that and think again.”
“What the fuck?” I glared at him, “You can’t possibly be threatening me with your dick. Do I look like a sex addict?!”
“Is that even a question?”
“Whatever. Aren’t we gonna shower? I feel sticky. And the sheet’s gotta change.”
“You can if you want.” He shrugged, pulling me closer and stuffing his head between my breasts once again. He then tangled his feet with mine. “But I want to sleep.”
It’s like he’s trying to destroy every little space between us. I can’t say I mind either. His warmth keeps making me feel tingly and I wanna use him as my personal teddy bear for however long I can.
So since he wants to… I guess we can stay like this…
“Nah, let’s just stay like this for a little while. Thirty minutes tops.”
At that, he raised his head a little so he was staring up at me, a few strands of his hair tickling my lips. A knowing look seeped into his eyes.
I rose a brow. “What?”
“If you wanna cuddle, you can just say so.” He said, visibly trying to hold in his laughter.
What the hell is he laughing at?
“I dont.” I lied.
“Admit it, babe.”
“I honestly don’t!”
“Just admit it.”
‘I don’t!”
“You do.”
“Shut the hell up or get off my tits! You got a tit fetish or what?”
“You’re so un-cute.” He laughed. “What’s wrong with wanting to cuddle?”
“I said I don’t!”
“Don’t lie.”
“I don’t!”
“You do.”
“I SAID I DONT…!”