Stella’s eyes grew wide as she stared at Jasper. Her mind went blank for a moment, but she quickly regained her wits.
“If you are doing this because you feel that you owe me something, then don’t. Officially dating you will make me suffer more,” Stella said as she continued to pack.
“What do you mean by that?” Jasper frowned. “Am I not qualified to be your boyfriend?”
Stella didn’t even look at Jasper. She zipped up the suitcase and placed it upright. She looked at Jasper seriously and said, “Before we date, we should like each other first. Do you think we like each other?”
Jasper pursed his lips tightly and looked at her with a livid face.
His demeanor shifted with his mood.
Stella walked towards the door with her suitcase in hand.
Jasper held her arm and looked at her. “I think we like each other.”
Stella’s heart skipped a beat. She looked at him. “I don’t want to date you. If you really want to, then let’s get married. Divorces are not allowed in military marriages. I dare you now.”
Jasper paused.
Stella smiled sarcastically. She turned around. “I have no time to waste anymore. It’s too dangerous to be the Chief’s girlfriend, and I don’t have the confidence to persevere till the end.
So if we’re really going to do this, I’d rather we get married. Then I will spend the rest of my life with you.
You don’t have to answer me now. I’ll give you a month to think about this. Think properly before you make any decision. There’s no turning back.”
She shook his hands off, opened the door, and walked out. Her eyes were dull, and the tears that coated them reflected the brightness of the sun.
Stella had had enough, she was tired and exhausted.
She couldn’t play any love games anymore, nor could she bear to face any tragic ending.
She was as good as dead if Suzi Shine and Steven Milton found out that they were dating.
Either she cut her ties with Jasper completely and move on with her own life,
or she could become Jasper’s wife. By then, what was done could no longer be undone. As the Chief’s wife, there was no way they could hurt her.
She chose to compromise due to her love for Jasper and to give herself one last chance.
If Jasper agreed to marry her, she would love him for the rest of her life, regardless of his intentions.
But she was scared and helpless.
She was afraid of being hurt mercilessly and losing the courage to carry on with life. She was scared that they would hurt each other in the end.
Her memories were like a blade slicing her heart piece by piece. When Jasper said, “Bettany, I miss you” she felt devastated to the point where she took her own life.
If it was the same after their marriage…
The fact the person she loved, loved someone else. Could she hold on to a marriage like that?
She was so conflicted, she couldn’t even think properly.
With the last of her wits, Stella found that something was wrong.
She quickly took out a white plastic bottle from her bag, took a look at the label, and poured out a black small pill into her trembling hands. She plopped it into her mouth, dragged the suitcase to a corner, leaned against the wall, clenched her fists, and slowly calmed herself down.
A minute later, she opened her eyes, her vision gradually cleared.
Everyone had their limits. When someone was severely hurt, their heart ached. The body would release toxins that invaded the nerves and cells.
Emotional pain would not heal like a cut. In fact, there’s no cure for it.
At a certain extent, a defense mechanism is triggered and the mind would start breaking down.
Schizophrenia was the most common ailment. Most patients indulged themselves in illusions and delusions. They would smash things, hurt people, destroy things, isolate themselves from any relationship and then completely leave reality.
Her mother was a classic example. She suffered from schizophrenia for a long time. She then got depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, insomnia, anorexia, various phobias, autism, split personality, and dementia.
She didn’t want to be schizophrenic like her mother,
she would rather die.
Stella picked herself up and left the corner.
Although doctors could not treat themselves, she knew how to deal with her ailments. She could divert her attention to happy thoughts.
Stella came out of the elevator and saw Jasper sitting on the sofa in the lobby.
She went to check out.
Jasper took her luggage.
Stella looked at him as he put her luggage into his car.
Stella went to him after she finished the procedures.
Jasper opened the passenger seat’s door. “I’ll take you to the train station.”
“Okay,” Stella nodded and calmly sat in the passenger seat.
Jasper drove off. “The murderer has been found, but this should be kept confidential. I have to stay here to deal with some other things. The dead have gone but the living need to move on. I have to do a secret compensation job,” he informed her.
“As long as your conscience is clear and you don’t have any regrets,” Stella sighed. “I didn’t use to believe in destiny and I thought that the future was in my hands. As long as I work hard and persist to achieve my goal, I thought I would always get what I deserve. But in reality, you can never dodge fate.”
“Didn’t you say to not have any regrets? If you don’t work hard, how could you not have any regrets?” Jasper asked as he looked at Stella’s white and delicate face.
She was a patient person and looked pretty as well. The more Jasper looked at her, the more mesmerised he got.
“I saw the news yesterday. There was a nineteen-year-old girl who jumped into a river because she broke up with her boyfriend.
A boy jumped in to save her. She was rescued, but the boy drowned.
Isn’t that fate?” Stella said with sadness.
Jasper held her hand and put it on his lap.
His palm was warm, and hers was cold.
“When I was helpless, I met Frederick. He found me a job and took my mother out of the psychiatric hospital. I thought my life would get better.
I only just found out he orchestrated all of it.
You rescued me from him, and I thought I had found happiness. I was willing to sacrifice everything for this happiness. God fooled me again. You lost your memory.” Stella looked at Jasper and tears started flowing down her cheeks.
Jasper held Stella’s hand tight and frowned. “I’ll marry you. We’ll get married when I’m done with my work.”
Stella smiled. She looked at him gently with her thumb easing his knitted brow. “You’re always like this. You take responsibility too seriously. You thought you owed me, so you wanted to compensate me. Jasper, I don’t need it.
You can live the life you want, don’t get too caught up with responsibilities and memories.
In fact, I can live better on my own.”
“What do you mean by that?” Jasper did not understand her. “I want to marry you. I only have one question for you now. Will you marry me?”