Angela’s POV
When I made sure Clark’s car was already gone, I walked quickly heading to our house. Our home was pretty close to where I landed.
When I got in front of the door, I immediately took the key and hurriedly went inside. I went to the kitchen to drink water.
To this day, the nervousness in my chest still lingered in my entire body. I was shaking while drinking the glass of water and gently laid it on the top of the table right after. I weakly sat down in the chair and combed my hair out of extreme tension.
I thought he would know my secret. He was staring at me while we were eating and he even noticed my mask. I was so thankful he didn’t insist on removing it on my face because if he does, my secret will be revealed.
I finally removed the mask that was covering my face and sighed.
“How long, Angela? How long will you be as Magda?” I asked myself while looking at the mask. I could no longer hold back the tears from my eyes. I immediately wiped it on the back of my right hand.
Why is my fate like this?
I couldn’t help but ask myself.
If only Papa hadn’t left us, I may have finished school. I may not have had to work an extreme job at a young age and I may not be in this kind of situation right now.
I sobbed at that thought.
Everything is just a ‘maybe’. I’m always dreaming.
I couldn’t help but laugh sarcastically.
I’m very ambitious.
Later, Clark suddenly entered my mind.
“I thought this is what I am waiting for? He’s already here, Angela. The person you’ve been waiting for, for so long. The person you think will be going to save you. The one who will help you to get out of the mud. The one who will love you wholeheartedly and face the world together,” I said to myself as I comb my fingers through my hair out of frustration.
But, I’m not ready. I’m afraid to tell Clark my dark secret. Negative thoughts are entering my mind that I fear to happen.
I touched my chest and felt the heavy weight of my heart carry for a long time. I felt like I had no right to be happy. Only temporarily.
I weakly got up from my seat and turned off the lights in the kitchen. I went straight to the room where my siblings were sleeping safe and sound on the mat.
I picked up comfortable clothes in the closet and went straight to the bathroom to clean my body. When I was done, I lay down next to my siblings and stared blankly at the ceiling.
Remembering Clark’s face.
I raised my left hand and gaze at the ring I wore on my ring finger.
“Do you have feelings for me? Do you feel the same as I do?” I asked. As if I was talking to him through the ring.
I shook my head and put down my hand. I felt like I’m a fool for talking to a ring.
I looked in my siblings’ direction. I gently caressed their faces and kissed them on their forehead.
“I love you so much…” I whispered in the air.
“Also you,” I whispered to the ring I wore on my finger. I smiled sadly and a few minutes later, I decided to go to sleep.
* * * *
“Big sister! Big sister!” Maymay woke me up and gently shook my shoulder.
I slowly opened and rubbed my eyes. I noticed that Kokoy was no longer on the mat. I faced Maymay’s direction.
“Big sister, give me some money. I’m going to buy our breakfast,” she said and pouted. I smiled at what I was seeing. How cute.
I immediately got up from the mat and went to the cabinet to get my purse. I took fifty pesos and handed them to her.
“Here… Buy thirty pesos of bread and a can of sardines so that we have spread,” I said while smiling.
Her eyes widened from what she heard. She ran out of the house and shouted ‘yehey’ in joy. She was happy to think we had spread today because usually, we ate bread only.
I hurriedly glanced outside the window to look after her.
“Slow down!” I reminded her before I left the room.
I was on my way to the bathroom to wash and brush my teeth when I saw Kokoy brewing coffee.
“Big sister, coffee…” he offered and laid it on the table.
“Just put it there. I’ll wash up first. Maymay buys our breakfast. She will come back any minute.” I said before entering the bathroom.
Tok! tok! tok!
“Big sister?” Kokoy knocked on the bathroom door. I immediately finished brushing my teeth.
“Wait a minute, Kokoy!” I shouted and hurriedly washed my face.
I opened the door instantly right after I finished.
“Are you going to take a bath?” I asked while wiping my face using a clean towel. He nodded at me in response.
“I see. Come, get inside and take a bath,” I ordered before finally coming out of the bathroom.
He was about to close the door when he stopped. Looked like he remembered something.
“Big sister, Auntie Bel is here. She’s looking for you. I told her that you’re in the comfort room, doing morning routine.” he said and finally opened and closed the door.
Bel?
I started walking to the kitchen and I found Bel sitting near the table in front of Maymay. I approached their direction.
When Bel noticed my presence, she hurriedly stood up and ran towards me.
“Angela! H-how are you?” she asked worryingly and didn’t know if she would hold me or hug me in too much tension. Visible on her face the extreme concern for me.
I couldn’t help but smile at her behavior.
“Bel, calm down first,” I giggled. The way she was worrying about me looked like she was my mother.
She followed my suggestion by slowly taking a deep breath and puffing it out.
When I thought she had calmed down, I glanced at Maymay who was busy eating breakfast.
I grabbed Bel’s hand and pulled her away in the child’s direction. I dragged her into our room and closed the door. I faced her direction right after closing it.
“H-how are you? About l-last night? Who’s that? Who pulled you? Did something happen to you, huh? Are you alright? ” she asked one after another. Looked like she wanted to touch me but for some unknown reason, she was fighting that urge.
My forehead creased when I saw that she was about to cry.
“Bel…” I uttered in surprise as she continued crying in front of me. I quickly approached her and wiped her tears.
“Why are you crying, huh? Bel?” I asked in astonishment as I wiped away her tears. She shook her head and buried her face in my neck before hugging me tightly.
“I-I’m sorry if I failed to protect you last night. I-I hope I didn’t let you work last night. It looks like you’re not okay yet,” she apologized.
I smiled and gently caressed her back to calm her down. I returned the hug.
“Shhh… I’m okay, Bel. Nothing bad happened to me last night,” letting her know.
“Then who pulled you outside of the entertainment club?” she asked as she hugged me tightly.
“He’s…” I bit my lower lip hard. Not sure if I should say it or not.
“…. Clark.” I finally answered.
Bel was stunned at what she heard.