TWENTY-SIX…
Today is my special day!
It’s my birthday today. As usual, a little partying. Just like always, I, and only my dance crew. I didn’t invite anyone, just a few close friends were fine.
It’s a good thing we don’t have a project today that often goes on during my birthdays.
We have been resting here in the Philippines for almost two weeks. The projects in Korea were given to others this time. Ben and the gang laid first. It’s been two months since we came from Japan with Trina. Do you remember?
That was the worst time of my life, promise!
Why is that?
I left the house that night without seeing Mama Cha. She left and didn’t even say where to go. Aunt Maggie came there because she brought Trina, and until we left, she hadn’t shown up. I still wanted to wait for her, but I was late for the flight. In my whole life, this is the first time she did that to me. Then… When we were at the airport, I couldn’t contact her anymore. She shortly blocked me from all the social media we use for communication when I am abroad. It was that easy for her! That’s how she gets mad at me. She doesn’t even care what’s happening to me anymore.
Until I was in Japan, there was no communication at all. I didn’t focus on work there because my mind was left at home thinking about her. Even my dance crew noticed that I was in a bad mood since we arrived. Who can work like that? From the time we left until a few days ago, we still had no conversation. She’s all I’m thinking about the whole time we’re there. I can’t even say hello or hear her voice. A voice call will do. She is mad at me, seriously mad. She’s one tough lady who doesn’t care once she’s irritated.
And then, there’s this Trina who always follows me, takes care of me, and even does my laundry! I rejected her at first, but I also didn’t prevent anything. Trina and I still shared the same room and I admit that something happened to us twice more. I don’t know why I was so easily seduced by her, despite always saying that I didn’t like her. I also got mad with Mama Cha because it was the second week that we were almost in Japan and we still didn’t have communication. And when I’m sad or overthinking, there goes this Trina, always ready for a play! But I admit, it doesn’t make sense that I would be seduced and make a fool of myself just because I was disgusted with her. It seems like what happened was that I was fed up with what she was doing to me by that time…
Does that mean my love for Mama Cha isn’t that deep yet? Or is it just lust that I feel? But not! I’m just really daring, I’ll admit! I’m just a man, so fragile that when I see Trina with her sexy nighties, I’m stunned too. I really can’t help it. But deep inside, I love Mama Cha so much that every time I f**k Trina, she’s the one in my mind and her face is all that I see. I sometimes speak her name while f**kin’ Trina. Especially when she’s giving me a blowjob.
But I thought that was the worst. I thought it would all end when I got back. When we returned to the Philippines, it seemed like Mama Cha’s treatment of me had changed. It’s still the same as before. I brought a lot of presents for her that she often asks for, but it seems that she’s not interested in all of that anymore. She doesn’t even talk to me much at that time and avoids me. There was this time when I wanted to hug and kiss her, but she got mad easily and then just left me without a word. Within the two months that have passed, we have made love only about twice, and she is hardly that warm to me anymore. She was right to just let me finish and then leave. There are also chances that I’m not forcing her even though I really want to make love to her because I miss her so badly.
I was hurt. That f**kin’ hurts so bad! What she does hurts me. I knew I was wrong. It was my fault, but I apologized to her and she accepted, but in return, she turned cold towards me. When I’m in the studio and going to her office, she doesn’t open the door for me, and then she tells me that she’s talking to someone over her phone, so I can’t come in.
Even so, she often avoids me. I still try to touch her and be sweet to her. My ways are still the same. I will bring her lunch, go home with her, and when we come home, I will take care of her there; the cooking, the laundry, talk to her sweetly, ask her how her day was! I keep on avoiding Trina as much as I can because I don’t want her to get mad at me again and again. Anything! Anything to please her. Nothing has changed in me, only in her.
To be honest! I miss Mama Cha so much. The sweetness and the teasing she does to me. The way she talks to me sarcastically! The way she kissed me back and looked at me, I missed all of that! That all faded away when I went to Japan with Trina. I have a hard time with what she is doing. I almost lock myself in my room because she does the same when home. Her door is always locked so that I can’t come in. We barely talk anymore. Sometimes, I would stick myself to the door of her room and listen to what she was doing inside until I felt that I was already crying, sobbing like a little child outside her doorstep. Just like today. It’s my birthday but she didn’t even stay at home; she went to the shop because she said she had a client coming and she couldn’t postpone the appointment.
She wasn’t like that before! She used to be the first of all, arranging the food and she never really left the house during my special day. She would even send some close friends, then they would also take a few shots. My birthday is often the day we both take a break from long days and months of work, but why does she not seem to care about this day anymore?
Apart from the fact that she left early, I didn’t even receive a greeting from her. Before, just as midnight dropped, she would knock on my door, and while entering she was singing while holding a piece of paper with the lettering “Happy Birthday Clint,” but why now? She seems to be too far away from me… Why can’t I seem to reach her anymore? Where is the old Mama Cha who warmly welcomes everything I give her, who always has time for me, the one that is not angry anymore tomorrow even if I pissed her off today? I miss her so much! I f**kin’ miss her so badly! If only I could turn back time, I wouldn’t have left so things could be avoided.
“Hey!” Ben patted me. “Is there a problem, brother? It seems like you’re getting more and more silent these days, ah? Care to share? Ha, Clint?” Ben said when he saw me looking at a distance.
“That’s deep! What are you thinking, Clint? You should enjoy your birthday and take note! Trina has a nice gift for you, brother! ” Ben expressed his delight.
I just looked at Ben. I didn’t even smile when he said that Trina had a nice gift for me. Trina is the root of everything; it all started when she came. Trina, who I don’t understand a role in my life.
“Huh? Ah, okay, all right! Clint! ” Ben called suddenly. “You need to go to the coffee shop, Aunt Cha passed out at the shop while serving! Gemma called because you can’t be contacted!”. Ben told me.
“Huh? What? ” I freaked out.
I was in a hurry. I snatched the car key from my pocket and ran out the gate. I’m going to Mama Cha’s coffee shop!
What could have happened to her? God! I hope it’s not bad!
June_Thirteen