Sofia’s POV
The whole thing only managed to remind me of my younger and only brother, Angelo. Because this was like a normal routine between us, where we’d argue and bicker just for the fun of it and sometimes it might be because we were actually arguing about real issues and not for the fun of it.
We also sometimes try to ignore each other for a few hours, but every time we get into that kind of fight, which isn’t very frequent, one of us always end up going back to meet the other ehen we were both supposed to be ignoring each other and staying mad at one and other, and from that very moment, we’d start talking and laughing with each other like none of the argument which had made us start to ignore each other at first, had never happened or taken place in the first place.
I moved a little on my spot on the couch and dragged in a deep breath, right before I puffed it out and then sighed out, which barely used up to a second in my lungs, all came out in a long sigh which portrayed exactly how I was feeling inside my head and heart at that very moment.
I missed my brother.
I missed him so much that it hurts. It hurts in the space in my heart, it hurts so much and each time I think about it, all that particular spot in my heart does is to squeeze painfully against the sides of the inside or my chest, and also to press against one another.
I didn’t realize when another sad sigh poured out from my mouth, my unfocused gaze still staring straight ahead like it had been doing all these while, while I had been completely lost in thoughts.
“What’s wrong?” I heard Ryan’s voice called out to me and I blinked my eyes once, moved a little in my seat and lifted my right hand up to use tne pads of my thumb to massage my eyes, and once I was done, I finally turned around to stare into the eyes of Ryan.
“Huh?” I asked and grimaced a little before starting to speak almost immediately.
“Sorry about moments ago, I think I zoned out.” I said to him and moved my thumb to my other eyes and started to massage the closed eyes after a few moments.
“It’s alright, what were you thinking about? It was obvious thst, thst particular thought made you really sad and gloomy, because your mood whifh was already starting to get brightened up a little, suddenly got really dimmed all of a sudden.” Ryan breathed out and since I had been staring at my fingers on my thighs throughout the time which he had started to speak, I dragged in a deep breath and puffed it out slowly, right before I moved my eyes over to Ryan’s face.
I breathed out a small sigh as I remained silent for a few more seconds, before I finally started to speak.
“It’s my brother.” I said in a quiet voice, and I wasn’t surprised with the way a small sigh followed those words out of my mouth.
Mentally? I feel extremely exhausted.
Physically? I feel just as exhausted, super exhausted.
And the thought of me starting to discuss my brother, a topic I knew was going to make me really sad and gloomy, was making me feel even more exhausted.
All I wanted to do at this moment was to crawl into the bed I share with Luca and to dive beneath the dark and thick blankets, and to get surrounded with that familiar scent which I had already started to classily as soothing, and perhaps I could inch closer to Luca’s side of the bed, and try to get more of that scent into my nose and get my head completely filled up whut the scent.
But I couldn’t do that at the moment, I didn’t even want to be by myself at this very moment because it felt like I might start crying immediately after I crawl into bed, because thinking about everything, how I miss my younger brother, was really making me feel depressing as hell.
I dragged in a deep breath into my lungs and puffed it out slowly, moving around a little on the couch and still managing to keep my legs folded beneath me on the couch throughout the whole time I’ve been sitting on it, without feeling all that uncomfortable.
It was a good thing that I was short and petite when it comes to something like this, I guess,
“Oh, you have a brother?” I heard Ryan’s voice echoed out beside my head and I turned my head around until I was staring at him, and then I nodded my head once at him before starting to speak. “Yeah, I do.” I said to him in a quiet voice and shrugged my shoulders a little.
“Oh? That must be really cool then, growing up with a brother and all.” He started to speak after a few moments and I smiled a little, just as I started to speak. “Oh yeah, it really is.” I said to him with a small shrug of my shoulders.
“I figured. So, it’s an older brother?” He asked and I started to shake my head instantly.
“No, no. It’s a younger brother. He’s my younger brother and there’s a three year gap between us.” I said to him with another small shrug of my shoulders, my mind immediately moving over to the part where it almost never felt like there was any kind of age gap between us, because of how he started to act at a particular point.
“That sounds really cool. So you’re the one protective of him, since you’re the older one between the both of you.” Ryan asked and I found myself grinning a little at that.
“Well, you see, it’s almost the other way round.” I said to him with a small grin.
“Oh, it is?” He asked and I nodded my head once before starting to speak. “Well, you see, you do see how short I am?” I said to him and watched as Ryan snorted once before nodding his head at me, and I found myself narrowing my eyes at him almost instantly, even before I realized what I had been doing.
“Well. At first, it used to be me being all protective of him and caring for him every moment, tending to all his needs and other relating things, and then all of a sudden, he started growing and started maturing, and all of a sudden, he started to grow really taller than I am, and started to care for me the way I care for me.” I paused and took in a deep breath, my mind choosing thst moment to conjure an image of Angelo’s arm wrapped around my shoulders protectively each time we were walking around in public, despite the fact that we most definitely had guards tailing us at that very second.
I puffed out the breath which I had dragged in a few moments ago, right before I turned my head around and stared into Ryan’s face.
“Sounds really cool, and honestly how I expected it to end up sounding because everyone knows how crazy the growth spruth hits them so unexpectedly.”
“Tell me about it.” I mumbled quietly with another shrug of my shoulders.
“Can you tell me what he’s like?” He asked and I nodded my head once before proceeding to start to speak. “He’s smart, really smart.”
“I guess he took after you because you’re extremely smart as well.” Ryan breathed out after a moment and I grinned a little before starting to shake my head, feeling my cheeks start to redden in embarrassment.
“Stop it.” I mumbled around a grin and ducked my head a little.
“He’s the best, he’s so amazing and he’s everything I’d ever wanted.” I continued to speak after a moment before pausing and continuing after a moment. “I honestly don’t know how I’d have survived without him in my life.”
“He sounds really amazing and cool.” Ryan mused.
“Because he is.” I confirmed almost immediately, befute proceeding to start to sing Angelo’s praises.
“He’s so talented and he’s literally always there whenever I needed him, he boxes from a really young age, he runs, gyms, take karate lessons and has a black belt in it, he even mastered to pick locks himself.” I whispered the last part out with a small shrug of my shoulders, I’d never not feel weirded about the whole thought of Angelo learning how to pick a lock on his own, super weird, because it felt wrong in my head that kids here in our world are literally being trained to either go into illegal stuffs or to be a something that was going to involve deaths and creating more enemies for one’s self.
So yes, I won’t be alright with that bit of information, but I remember how proud Angelo had been, and I just knew that Ryan was going to be really impressed as well.