CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE –
CHRIS POINT OF VIEW
“Animal in the sack…” The mocking words replayed in a malicious loop as I paced the cramped confines of my studio apartment, the discarded groceries forgotten on the sagging futon.
I paused, running my hands through disheveled locks as I wheeled towards the laptop again.
“Okay, Chris… deep breaths,” I murmured, flexing my fingers to dispel the lingering sting from when I’d pounded the wall.
“Time to learn more about this Miles asshole and what horrors he inflicted on Megan.”
The search engine was already loaded, so I simply punched out the name, the web exploding with an avalanche of results.
My eyes boggled at the sheer volume – movie premieres, charity galas, People Mag covers – all glossily depicting the same chiseled, generically handsome face with an oily smile plastered on.
“Holy shit…” I swallowed hard against the lump of indignant revulsion creeping up my throat. “This Miles character is like… the quintessential douche-bro celebrity schmuck.”
My eyes raked over the synopses, hardly believing that such an egregious embodiment of vapid, artificial Hollywood douchery could exist in real life, let alone hurling his cruelties at someone as substantive and admirable as Megan.
Maybe the gossip girls had been onto something in their refusal to fathom such an ill-matched pairing existing in the natural order.
I shook my head in disbelief, only to stiffen as a particular headline made my heart plummet sickeningly.
*”This Year Hollywood Award winners: Miles and Hailey – A Destined Pairing?”*
Wait!?
My mouth went dry, blood pounding in my ears as the room seemed to spin ever so slightly.
Beside the garish headline, shining like gaudy status symbols, were Miles and… Hailey?
The Hailey? My Ex?
Smiling beatifically on some pompous awards show red carpet, arms slung around each other with the familiar ease of longtime companions?
No… please, God no.
With a trembling hand, I double clicked the image and felt my worst nightmares validated – it was her.
Hailey, my Hailey, simpering on the arm of this objectively grotesque caricature of male privilege and entitlement.
The former love of my life whom I’d once dreamed of growing old with, now just another publicity-addicted socialite suckling at the teat of Hollywood’s soul-devouring machinery.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me…” The words scraped out in a breathless rasp as I slumped back, head spinning and stomach churning.
This was too much – the separate worlds of my quiet, unassuming life of introspection and Megan’s voracious, glitz-drenched public saga were colliding in an almost cruelly ironic convergence.
And sitting squarely at the epicenter, preening like some self-satisfied spider, was the very same insidious, dehumanizing figure who had nearly derailed Megan’s life before she triumphed over his sickening dominance.
The longer I stared at the garish image, the more my righteous fury roiled and eddied within.
This… this prick was directly or indirectly responsible for the immense personal traumas and psychological minefields both of the remarkable, complicated women in my life had been forced to navigate.
My sweet, gentle Hailey – the girl I’d planned a future with.
No wonder she wanted to keep our relationship secret.
And poor Megan… she’d miraculously extricated herself from his egocentric bastard clutches only to now be forced to constantly relive and reopen those freshly healed wounds by the mere specter of his continued success and relationship with my ex.
The injustice, the unfathomable cosmic cruelty of it all made me want to scream until my vocal cords shredded.
Instead, I allowed the hot, furious tears to finally spill down my cheeks, dampening the collar of my shirt as I stared unseeingly ahead.
What?
Why am I crying?
I swiped furiously at the traitorous tears streaking my cheeks, disgusted by my own emotional outburst.
This wasn’t about me or my failed relationship with Hailey – at least, not entirely.
So, they’re both cheaters!
For me, well… it had cost me the single most important relationship I’d ever nurtured.
A bond forged for years over countless late nights in the campus coffee shop, trading earnest whispers and dreams for the future with the brilliant emerald-eyed girl who’d effortlessly stolen my heart from day one.
…
8 years ago
“Chris! Earth to Parsons – you still with me here?”
Hailey’s gentle laughter and the weight of her delicate hand on my forearm jolted me from my thoughts.
blinked owlishly before fixing her with a sheepish grin, my brow furrowing in that trademark wrinkle she always teased me about.
“Sorry, got lost in the rabbit hole of my own musings again,” I admitted with a chuckle, reaching across the sticky tabletop to interlace our fingers. “You know how I tend to spiral once the gears start turning, babe.”
She squeezed my hand with fond exasperation, chin propped on her free palm as she regarded me with that achingly familiar expression of amusement and steadfast adoration that made my heart flutter traitorously.
“One of these days, I’m going to find a way to chain you to the present moment where you belong,” she chided playfully, green eyes sparkling with mirth. “No more drifting off into the existential void without me.”
I chuckled again, stroking my thumb in soothing arcs across her knuckles as I drank in every radiant detail of her lovely features, committing them to memory.
The dusting of cinnamon freckles across her pert nose, those inviting rosebud lips so often pursed in contemplation or delight, the tumble of fiery auburn tresses that always smelled faintly of lavender…
She really was the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid eyes on, hands down.
But then, I was utterly biased when it came to anything involving Hailey Brooks.
“Deal,” I finally replied, giving her hand a gentle tug to pull her closer before brushing a chaste kiss to her brow. “Though you’ll have to give me a few more years to start making sense of this crazy world before I stop pondering its mysteries altogether.”
She laughed again, nose crinkling in that way that made my heart melt as she settled comfortably against my side with a contented sigh.
For a long while we just breathed together, finding that unique synchronicity that grounded us amidst the madness of cramming for finals and juggling work commitments with our fledgling relationship.
Just two kids madly, wildly in love with the paths sprawling out before us and burning with the passion to travel them side-by-side.
“You know…” Hailey’s mellifluous voice broke the silence after what felt like an eternity, “I’ve been giving a lot of thought to that offer from the acting conservatory in Hollywood. And I think… I think I want to take it.”
So, she’s considering it? Is she leaving me for real?
I feel my chest hardens at her words.