Chapter Fifty-Seven
Fiona’s Point of View:
He feared something might have gone wrong. Attitudes like this make me even more sure that there was something she was not telling me.
I had dinner quietly with Alex sitting in a corner watching me. I knew he was lost in thoughts; otherwise, she would have said something by now.
I did not have the appetite to eat, but I had to force myself. He would only get more worried if I refused to eat.
“I am going to bed, Alex. See you tomorrow,” I said lightly to get her off the mood she was in.
“Alright honey, be sure to leave the door open and turn on the lights. You know I will check to see that you do it,” and he was not joking when he said that.
He would check the lights and make sure I left the door open every night before I went to bed.
I have gotten used to it, and it feels more like a ritual than something you have an obsession with.
At first, I thought he was obsessed with lights and everything. But as time went on, I was not so sure anymore.
I shivered and heard the fear in my breath when he came to my room and found out I did not have the lights on. I knew it was more than just an obsession.
I found it difficult to go to sleep. Alex had checked in on me and gone to bed. I doubt he slept at all.
Every 3 hours or so, he comes into my room to check if the lights are still lit and the pendant in place.
I wanted to go to sleep every night as I did not want to have a nightmare. It has become something usual, like a routine.
Things like this would have excited me, but it became worrisome as it continued.
I remembered the guy from the show and smiled. I was angry at myself. “Why did I smile?” I asked myself.
That stranger had guys, more guys than anyone I had ever known. He most likely just ruined the entire evening for me and here I was thinking about him.
I could not forget how he looked at him, that stare was entrapping as well as enchanting. I could swear he would have taken me anywhere at that moment and I would not care.
“Did you see his eyes? My God, those are the most beautiful eyes I might have seen in my lifetime,” I was already sounding like everyone else in love.
He was well-built and, to me, he was perfect. The body build, the face, everything was just right. Only one thing, he was not mine.
“Why was I having such silly thoughts?” I asked myself again, unable to get him off my mind.
This was the first time in a long while I had felt an attraction to a male. I had feared I was hard to please or allergic to attractions, but this changed everything.
No guy has been able to keep my attention this long. He already had my heart without even asking first. The way he winked and flirted with me, I must admit I enjoyed myself and only vexed me because no one did that to me without permission.
“He called me butterfly,” I remembered.
“How sweet,” I thought almost immediately, regretting it. I had to stop thinking of this stranger. Maybe I should have told him my name and not played “unimpressed”.
For a moment there, I was excited and had forgotten my ordeal. Try as I might, I was at one point going to fall asleep and continue with those nightmares I dreaded.
“I don’t want that life, you hear me. I do not want it. I am just some ordinary girl, perhaps even a ‘nobody’ to some people. Just let me sleep, huh? For once!” I said, like whoever it was that controlled dreams would hear and help me just tonight.
I only wanted to sleep, nothing more. Was it too much to ask? I do not think so.
I climbed out of bed myself this time, slightly disoriented. I reach for my glasses and the vague shapes take on more concrete qualities and I realize why I don’t feel like I’ve been thrown out of some kind of alternate dimension this time around.
It’s just 3:30 in the morning. It’s the first time I have woken up peacefully in weeks. I shove back the covers and stare at my feet.
My mind goes to the two guys from last night, the sleaze ball and the puzzle. I resolve to stop thinking about the disgusting memories one brings and the conflicting feelings the other has.
However, I can’t forget that look on his face when I looked up at him. He looked shocked and confused, which was just weird, because he leaned on me first.
Whatever, I don’t need more nonsense to think about now. I’m pretty sure my brain is almost fried by now.
Snapping out of it, I jump out of bed and slide my legs into my flops. No point going back to bed if I’m just going to wake up with nightmares.
It’s a Saturday, anyway, so I can always take a nap later on. I’m still lucky with my naps; they don’t send me racing out of bed.
My stomach rumbles, reminding me that I didn’t have dinner last night. I was too busy, dodging Alex’s invasive looks and worried chattering.
I know there’s something important he’s hiding from me, especially in light of recent events. I’m not going to say anything though. He has all the time to tell me if she wants to, so I’m going to hold out until he eventually does so, or I go mad with worry and confusion; whichever comes first.
Thank goodness that I was blessed with the patience of mothers, and I was willing to wait, no matter how long it would take.