~Zion’s POV~
Everyone had left, but I was still outside, waiting for my wife to fall asleep so I could sneak into her room and snuggle up to her while she was asleep. Rub her tummy and apologize to my kids. I almost killed them. I am so stupid. Very stupid. Maya has seen too much already, but she has never once overreacted. She always waited for me to explain, but I didn’t even fucking wait for her to explain before jumping to conclusions like an idiot. I wronged my wife, and she’s not even leaving me. I got up from the chair. I glanced inside the hospital room from the window. I noticed she was sleeping. I opened the door and closed the window, so no one can see what was inside. Thank God Lucas managed to get her into a VIP room. I went inside to get some warm water. She hasn’t taken a shower since the morning. So I went inside to get some warm water and a clean cloth to wipe her down.
Has she eaten?
The thought of that made tears stream down my face. I can’t believe myself. I can’t fucking believe what I have done today. I don’t deserve them. What if I hurt them again? What was I thinking? All I do is hurt my wife every time, and all she does is love me over and over again. I don’t deserve Maya. She is too precious for a man like me. I started wiping her whole body. When I looked at the water, I almost cried. I hate myself. I hate myself for causing her pain and for being so stupid. I told her I wasn’t sure the kids were mine. How did I even manage to say that? I took the bowl away and came back to sit next to her. I brushed her hair and gave her another foot massage. When I was done, I knew I had to talk to the two souls growing in her stomach. I place my hand on her tummy, my head on the bed, and with the other free hand, I hold my wife’s hand.
“Noah, Sophia, daddy is so sorry. Everything is so new to Daddy, and he can be jealous. He has never loved anyone like he loves your mommy. But that is no excuse for what I did to Mommy today. I almost lost you guys because of my stupidity. Daddy only wanted Mommy for himself, and he got jealous and acted harshly toward Mommy. Please be strong for Daddy. The two of you and Mommy are my whole existence, but today, today, I let Mommy down. I’m so sorry, my prince and princess. ”
“Why didn’t you listen to me?” I jerked my head up, surprised that she was not sleeping, ashamed that I couldn’t even look at her. She is everything, but I am a jerk ass. I’m sorry is all I can say. Ever since this marriage started, I’ve been saying I’m sorry. It’s more like I’m the younger one, not my wife. I have never been jealous of anyone in my life before, but my wife makes me lose all sanity. How can love make someone do all sorts of crazy things? I almost killed my children, and now I’m not even sure of my stand with my wife.
“I’m sorry.”
“Do you want this, Zion? Do you even want us in your life? You tried to…” I cut her off.
“Please don’t say it. I know what I did was wrong. You told me you wanted to rest. I was so mad. I….” I took a deep breath. I can’t even fucking look at her. I tried to kill my own kids. Shit! I can’t cry in front of her. She can’t see me like this. I got up, refusing to look at her. I need to think. My actions today were inhumane. I tried to walk out, but she stopped me.
“And where are you going?”
“Maya, I don’t deserve you and the kids. What I did today… I almost killed the 3 of you today. How can I sit here and act like what I did can be justified? ”
“And you put me here on this bed, and now you want to leave me here to sleep in this horrible bed by myself. Don’t you think you also need to suffer like me? You want to go home and sleep comfortably while I twist and turn in this metal bed?”
How does she do it? How does she fucking do it? I fucked up, and she’s still here, trying to make me feel better about my horrible actions. I smiled and locked the hospital door. Then I went to bed. It was big enough for four people to sleep. I made sure there was a distance between us on the bed, but she closed the distance and placed her head on my chest.
“You, Lord Archer, are banned from having sex with me.” I don’t say shit. She’s the boss. She drew a cross on my chest. “And from today onwards….” she paused and looked at me straight in the eye. I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all, then she continued, “We will sleep in different rooms.” I closed my eyes, but I can’t protest. I simply don’t have a say. She then continued, “You will not touch my stomach.”
“Anything but that. I don’t mind 1 and 2, but please Maya. Please do not separate me from my kids. I know I don’t deserve them after what happened today. I beg of you, not my kids. ”
“Okay, we can do that, but I’m leaving.”
“What!”
“I’m going back to M-City. I think it will be best if I stay there for now.”
“I’m going with you.”
“You need to work; I will go alone.”
“Maya, if I promise that I won’t touch your belly, will you stay?” I can’t believe I have to negotiate for my wife to stay with me at the expense of giving up my kids. So much for a misunderstanding. At least when she’s here, she will see how sorry I am for what I have done. If she leaves, she won’t ever know how I feel.
“Then I’ll stay.”
“Please stay and I promise I will not stay.”