“You don’t think it’s a big deal that you fucked your own brother?” was all Sarah’s mother could say. The moment the sentence left her mouth, she realized how absurd it was.
Sarah rolled her eyes, “It wasn’t like that! They were just hookups. We followed the rules. It is NOT a big deal!”
With their parents panic stricken at finding out about their hookup arrangement, Sarah and her brother sat at the kitchen table, waiting for the lecture to stop. Sarah even had the audacity to check her text messages on her phone at one point, which caused her mother to scream even louder.
It had all started just before the end of high school. They went to an upscale, elite private school just down the road from the family’s 5, 000 square foot mansion. Sarah had been sexually active for so long that she was totally bored with the same old drink-and-fuck routine that came every Saturday. She never had a need for a boyfriend, so she bounced from hook-up to hook-up, trying different races, different sized cocks, whatever she wanted.
It was easy: she and her older brother were considered the sexiest two people in school. Sarah stood at 5″8, blonde hair with piercing green eyes, and a healthy chest. She tanned regularly and made sure to show her tanlines through her preppy school uniform any chance she could. Her brother was 6″4, muscular, and had the highest cheekbones she’d seen. Yet, they had never been “attracted” to each other in the traditional sense.
Just before graduation, one of Sarah’s hookups posted pics of her on Social media in the midst of a threesome with two football players from the public school across the city: one black, one hispanic. In a white-bred, white-run neighborhood, this was a massive scandal. For the last few weeks of school she was shunned by her parents, called a slut by anyone with an open mouth, and had to drag her feet through graduation. When it was finally summer, she found herself unable to venture outside her circle of friends, and without the two things she craved: booze and orgasms.
At some point, her brother mentioned that his “girlfriend” (which, in their sleepy rich neighborhood was a cover for their morally ambiguous hookups) wanted to sleep with Sarah’s “boyfriend” in a threesome. The girl had only seen a social media picture of him, but that was considered enough reason for someone to ask for a hookup. Sarah was never one for lesbian antics, so she suggested they get shared hotel rooms with a third couple and swap around partners for a night, obviously avoiding sleeping with each other .
A long story short: Sarah saw her brother nude and in a lot of sexual situations. Once the night was over, her seclusion grew, and she wanted sex. She found several internet forums with other siblings who slowly but surely had casual sex.. . and they all seemed so normal, like ordinary people. Incest started to not sound like a dirty word.
Finally, she talked to her brother, and laid out the ground rules for their sexual trysts. She knew he was too horny and too stupid to insist otherwise, and the gross factor wasn’t a concern after she’d been without a man for a full month. To her shock, her brother readily admitted that he was attracted to her. When she pressed, he said it wasn’t really a choice.
“Every man who sees you wants you,” he had said, “You’re one of those women. Like… beyond sexy. It’s kinda sucked that you’re my sister.”
Off and on, sometimes twice a month, sometimes once every few months, sometimes twice a week, they fucked. It was discreet, over fast, and she never thought of it as anything more than a hookup. It felt good, and he was reliable.
Two years later, while they were both away attending the same college, her brother had secretly recorded one of their sessions for masturbation material. After they came home for the year, a mixup with cloud drives and leaving a phone unlocked had allowed his mother to find the video. And so, she found herself getting reamed by both her parents, just as the summer was getting started.
“How on earth is it not a big deal? What the fuck do you mean ‘rules?’ What RULES are there to this nightmare?”
Once again she rolled her eyes at her mother. “We made sure to do certain stuff so there wasn’t any feelings. I didn’t want to have feelings for him, that would be gross. And we did it with other people and stuff, we weren’t ‘together’ or anything.”
Her mother’s face was a ghastly shade of white. “Please, do tell me the rules.”
Her brother chimed in, “You really want to know?”
Their mother just placed her hands on their waste.
Sarah felt the need to list the rules. Every kid at school knew the rules, in order to avoid feelings. Otherwise, it was hard for girls to hookup without getting attached.
“We never kissed, he never looked me in the eye, he never came in me, we always used a condom, and when it was over he got up and left.”
Her mother’s mouth was wide open. Her dad seemed strangely quiet.
“All so you can just have sex and not feel anything for the person? Why would you do that? That is apalling! Young lady, how can you even… I can’t even look at you.”
Sarah continued, “Mom, what’s the difference? If we don’t have kids and nobody has feelings then it’s just a good time. We just took care of that stuff when we couldn’t find anyone else, ok? It’s NOT a big deal. You’re being intolerant.”
Her dad finally started talking, “It is a big deal, and it’s disgusting. Families are around for the rest of your life, and you crossed a line with this. Your relationship will never be the same. You must have some kind of sex addiction problem, and it’s just destroyed our family. First the pictures, and now this…”
“Fuck you, dad!” her brother yelled. Her parents just sat in silence. Sarah thought they were both so pathetic.
“Alright, well, you’re going with your mother to the lake house for the rest of the summer. Sarah, you’re staying here with me. I don’t know how else to put an end to this… thing … you’re both doing to each other. And we’re going to make sure you’re living with roommates next semester, and ONE of you is transferring to a different school. This is so far beyond horrifying to me and your mother… if anyone found out about this we’d be ruined. NO ONE is to tell ANYONE about this! Your brother leaves tomorrow, NO ARGUMENT!”
“THAT ISN’T FAIR!” Sarah squealed, “We didn’t do anything wrong!”
The back and forth continued until both kids stormed off to their rooms. The next day, kicking and screaming, Sarah’s brother left with her mother to the lakehouse. Sarah truly, in the ultimate fog of teenage delusion, did not understand what the problem was with having casual sex with her own brother.
The next night, she went downstairs to find her father very drunk and surrounded by empty beer cans, watching television. She sat on the living room couch, hoping to cool off any tension they shared. After a half hour of silence, she broke the ice.
“Are you still mad at me dad?” she asked. He stayed silent, which upset her.
“Are you not going to talk to me?”
He sighed.
“I worked for twenty five years to build this family, this house. I did everything for you two and your mother, thinking it’d make me so happy…. to have a little dream life. What a fucking joke. What a fucking nightmare.”
Sarah was shocked, “Dad, I am STILL your daughter!”
He chuckled sarcastically and paused. “You haven’t been my daughter since those photos came out. You’re something else. It’s bad enough you dragged my only son into this. My life is for shit. What a fucking joke.”
Unsure of what to do, she sat in silence for a bit longer, and then retired to her room.
She had hated her parents since high school. All they did was expect her to do things she didn’t want to do. Suburbia was torture, everything was boring, and she just wanted to have a good time. She didn’t understand why it was a big deal. Her parents didn’t understand how modern, mature kids had fun, they were stuck in their old ways like the losers they were. After all, they hadn’t hurt anyone. If you don’t hurt anyone , how can you do anything wrong?
And yet, her mind wandered to the time in her dorm, when her brother had lasted longer than usual, when he put his muscular arm around her as he came. She looked and saw his face, and she saw him as someone other than a taboo cock…. she felt close to him. For just a moment there was intimacy between them, something her family had always lacked. When he got up to leave, she felt cold, and alone. The only smell in the air was the lingering latex scent from the condom. She had wanted him to stay, and be with her. It took her a few days to feel normal again, to be around him without feeling confused.
Maybe they were right… maybe it was a bad idea. But, fuck them. She did what she wanted to do, and she’d never admit she was wrong. Never to her parents, never. To hell with them and their bullshit expectations. She could totally understand how gay people felt about not being able to get married. Society judged her. She was the victim here, and they just didn’t understand.
—-
Two weeks passed, and Sarah was sitting in her room on a sleepy, relaxed Saturday afternoon. She wore a plaid shirt that clung to her body, showing plenty of cleavage, coupled with tight blue jeans. She furiously texted her friends, all of whom didn’t understand why her brother had to leave town so suddenly. She was thankful no one knew of their arrangement, and trusted her brother not to reveal anything to his friends. Doing so would mean becoming the laughing stock and ire of the entire suburb , if not a staple on every bottom-of-the-barrel porn site on the internet. How could she explain to a future boyfriend that there was a video of her fucking her brother in regular circulation on the web? It just couldn’t happen. She was deathly afraid it would be uploaded somehow.
Her dad had played the sad card since her brother left, drinking and sulking, only leaving the house to work. He sat despondent, staring at the television. Occasionally she would yell at him, accusing him of trying to make her feel guilty. She ‘d curse, hurl insults, anything to get a reaction out of him. He just stared straight ahead, silent.
It didn’t matter to her. Her mother kept putting her allowance into her bank account, and she could leave whenever she wanted. As far as she was concerned, the house was a place to sleep while the summer dragged on, nothing more.
Then her dad opened her bedroom door that Saturday afternoon, closed it, and stared at her. He was even taller than her brother, at least 6″7, unshaven and looking haggard. Despite this, his steely blue eyes stared ahead.
“What do you want? Don’t you knock?” she said coyly.
He walked forward and sat in a desk chair beside her bed. He sort of stared at her, his mouth slightly open.
“What? What is it?” she asked.
He took a deep breath and then looked at the floor.
“You have a choice. It’s important you know you have a choice…”
Sarah was instantly confused.
“You can either stay in the room, and do exactly, and I mean exactly, what I want. Or, you can leave. If you leave, I will email the video of you and your brother to everyone you know. Anonymously. And the world will know what you did.”
Sarah’s heart sunk. What the hell was going on?
“You can leave. I want you to know that. But if you do, I send the video.”
She shook her head, “What about all that crap about keeping it a secret?”
“You have to make your choice now. You can either stay, or you can leave. I sent your mom and brother away for a reason.”
She froze. There wasn’t any way this was going to go the way she thought it was going…. was it? He couldn’t…. what was he doing?