“Are you nervous?” Valdo said he enlaced his free hand in mine.
I looked across at him and smile. “I’m terrified.”
He kept his eyes on the road while he replied, “Everything is going to be okay.”
“What will people say if I go waltzing back in their town after disappearing? What will they say when they see me with a baby? Oh, and let’s not forget you. What will they say when they see me with you?” Anxiety was killing me. Alton was a judgmental town, and the news of my return would spread like wildfire.
“You’ll keep your head up. We’re going for your mother, not for them. They’re not important. They never were, and they never will be.” he looked and me briefly then back at the road. “Can I tell you a non-secret?”
I nodded, “Sure.” “When I was around eight, my mother lost her job, so we didn’t have much money or much of anything tbh. She decided that she would put pride behind her and go back to her parents for some help.”
“That’s brave of her.” There were many days I thought about going back to Alton, but I knew I would never be able to look those people in the eyes and be brave. I just couldn’t do it, and so I chose to continue being homeless.
He nodded and continued. “It was. I remembered that day like it was yesterday. She packed a few pieces of clothes for the both of us and then we left on the first time bus Monday morning. It was one of those towns where everyone lived at least a mile away from each other, and then there was the town. The town is where the bus would let off passengers. As soon as we came off the bus, I heard the whispers. I knew they were talking about us because they were staring, pointing and even calling my mother’s name. We had to wait for a taxi to take us to my grandparents’ ranch and while we waited, we were the centre of everyone’s attention. My mother was trying her best to ignore all their mean words at her, but I could see that she wanted to cry, but she didn’t. We stood and waited for fifteen minutes, and as soon as we entered the taxi, she started crying. She couldn’t let them see her break. You shouldn’t either. Ignore, Ignore, Ignore.” he looked at me. “If anyone says anything to you, then I’ll be right there to defend you.”I sneezed our enlaced hands.
“Your mother is brave.”
“And so are you.” he gave me a quick smile. “You can’t change the past, so embrace it. If you didn’t get pregnant, then we would have never met. You would have never got the opportunity to see the real person you were dating. You’d probably still be with him thinking that he loves you.” Valdo was right. If I didn’t get pregnant, then I’d still be William’s puppet. Now I know that his intentions were only purely physically. I should have seen it from before, what good man slander his mother’s name?
“His name is William. I think I should tell you in case we run into him while we’re there.” the thought never crossed my mind until now. What will I do when I face the asshole who denied my child and called me a whore?
“He’ll be running in my fist if I ever see him.” I chuckled at his response. If I have the strength and confidence to punch William, then I would have when he denied my child and called me and my mother whores, but he was too tall and big. His body mass was nowhere near’s Valdo’s, but William scared me a little. I get the sense that if I hit him, then he’d hit me back and not regret it. He was ruthless, and it took me getting pregnant for me to realise how cruel he could be.
“He deserves it.” I’d love to see Valdo’s fist meet Will’s face because he did deserve a punch. No real man would abandon his child.
“I doubt he’ll want to step up and be a father.” I laughed.
“No, he won’t. As far as he’s concerned my mother and I are town whores.”
“Good.” I frowned at his reply, he noticed my frown and smiled, “I mean good because I don’t want him near Jamaica. He’s toxic.” he gave me a look then continued. “I know it’s not my call whether he gets to be apart of her life or not, but whatever happens I want you to choose what you know is best for Jamaica.”
“We. The two of us. That’s what’s best for Jamaica. Hopefully, my mother joins the crew, if not, then I’ll always have Hannah and Kevin. Zuria is pretty amazing too.”
“Yes, we’re your family now, and we all love you. We’re not going to abandon you,” he assured.
I sighed. “I was so stupid. I thought I loved him and that he loved me too.”
“How do you know that you don’t love him? After all, he was your first.” Valdo had a point, but I’m 100% sure that I never loved Will.
I smiled, “I never told you he was my first.” he gave me a look, and I laughed, “He was though and only one to ever, you know.”
He nodded, “I see.”
“What I felt for him wasn’t love. It was infatuation or less than that, Lust? As soon as he called me a whore, the switch inside my brain flipped. It wasn’t love. Love is more than just sex; it’s caring unconditionally.” I looked at him and smile. “It’s philia, eros and agape all in one. It’s indescribable. It’s… It’s helping a stranger. It’s when your heart beats increases when you’re with that special person. It’s when that person can make you smile without even doing anything funny. It’s when you know that person will never hurt you. It’s when you always want to be with that person. It’s when you feel protected and safe. It’s powerful…” my voice faded as I started to realise that I just voiced how I felt to Valdo. I looked at him to see how he’d respond.
He smiled, “I understand.” Did he? Has he been in love? Has there ever been a girl that made him daydream? I wanted to know, so I bravely asked.
“Have you ever been in love?” I looked at him and waiting eagerly for his answer.
“No, but I’m falling in love now.” he smiled and looked at me while he replied.
I blushed at his words. “Me too.”
He chuckled, and I couldn’t help myself, so I chuckled as well.
Everything will be okay, as long as I have Valdo by my side I’ll be fine.
“Turn left in 800 metres.” the GPS instructed. I looked at the backseat and smile. Jamaica was sleeping peacefully in her car seat. My beautiful baby. I closed my eyes and did a short prayer hoping that everything goes well for my stay here. I turned my eyes back to the road, and Valdo turned on the road which led to Alton.
“Everything will be okay. We’re going straight to your mother’s place. We’ll see how goes from thereon. You’ll always need to ask her for your documents because you’re eighteen, which means you’re an adult. We need to get you fully documented. You’re going to need a Passport and a Driver’s license.”
“Driver’s License, why would I need a driver’s license? I don’t know how to drive.” I said with a frown.
“I’ll teach you.”I smiled.
“Thanks and the passport?”
“To travel, of course. That’s the purpose of a Passport.”
I laughed, “I know what it’s used for. I’ve never left the US before or made plans to leave, so a Passport never crossed my mind.”
“Well I travel, a lot and I’d feel bad to leave you and Jamaica alone while I’m enjoying myself in the tropics.”
“So we’re getting a Passport for her as well.”
“Of course.” I smile. Could he be any sweeter? All my life, I’ve been poor. I’ve never got everything I wanted, and that’s because my mother only bought things that I needed. When I just entered puberty, it would make me mad that my mother couldn’t afford the things I wanted. While the girls in my class were wearing Vans, I was wearing second-hand thrift store shoes.
As I got older, I started to see that what I was wearing wasn’t important. I began to appreciate how hard my mother worked for it. I always kept my goals simple. I never went out much growing up, so listening to Valdo tell me about the future trips that we will be taking is making me super excited.
“How do you feel about Jamaica?”I raised my brows.
“The baby or the country?’
“The country. It’s very nice in December,” he said it so casually.
“You want us to go next December?”
He chuckled, “That’s not a bad idea, but I was leaning towards, this December.”
“Won’t the passport and those things take a while to get?” My mother handled all my documents, so I didn’t know much about how to get certain things.
“No, it takes around six weeks. Less if you get it express.”
“What about booking flights and such?”
He smiled, “You don’t know anything about travelling, do you?” he ruffled my hair with his free hands, “It’s okay. I’ll teach you everything you need to know about this big world. As for booking the flight, we’ll take my jet. As for the hotels and such, my assistant will deal with that.”
“You’re super-rich, aren’t you?”
“I told you that the first time we met.”
“Yea, but I just realise how much. Not that it matters. You deserve all your successes, especially after what happened to you and your mom.”
“It’s fate. For all us.”
“What do you mean?”
“Both of our parents were single mothers, struggling to provide for their child. I made it in the business world, and I met you who happened to be in the same situation as my mom. Fate brought us together. We deserve to be happy, especially since neither of us knows our biological father. This is their karma for abandoning us.”
I smile, “That’s a good way of putting it.”
“We’re here,” Valdo said he turned off the car engine. I didn’t even realise when the car had stopped moving.
“Hmmm?” I turned my head from his face and looked ahead. I realised where I was immediate. I turned my head to the side and looked at the one-bedroom apartment that my mom and I shared, or should I say used to share.”Are you ready?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be. Let’s go.” We exited the car and took Jamaica and her car seat with us. We walked to the door and pressed the buzzer.
“Who is it?” Chills ran threw me as I heard my mother’s voice for the first time in months. “I’m coming,” she shouted. We waited in silence for a few seconds then the apartment door suddenly opened. I looked at my beautiful mother, and tears started to fall.
“Jacky”