“You’ve described two situations where someone needed you to behave in a way you say is out of character for you but you did. Were you uncomfortable and awkward during the behavior? Did you have to struggle to maintain the behavior?” she asked.
Ben thought about his interactions with Tina and found no discomfort at all but then Tina was a very mature and level headed young woman with minimal drama. He examined his memories of the prior night and the morning after with the twins. To his surprise found that the only time he experienced emotional discomfort was when he saw Lisa was in pain.
“Are you perhaps discovering the behavior wasn’t actually uncomfortable at all?” Dr. Granger asked gently.
Ben looked at her with surprise.
“Ben, you’ve described to me your need to protect, nurture, and support. Dominance is part of that. Have you interacted with more dominant personalities? Did that feel uncomfortable?”
“I’m not sure if I’ve encountered a truly dominant personality yet. I know some very strong women and I count them as my best friends. I certainly don’t try to impose my will on them or their lives. I’m just delighted and grateful they share their lives with me.” he said frankly.
“It sounds like your impression of the person you are may not line up with who you actually are. You didn’t believe you were dominant but clearly you can be if the need arises. This is an excellent exercise in self-discovery. A very positive step. So last night you weren’t actually pretending at all. Your integrity is safe.”
Ben’s eyebrows rose as that idea sunk in. He felt better and smiled at the doctor.
She smiled and glanced at the wall clock. “Our time is almost up and this is an excellent place to stop for today. I’d like to see you same time next week. That’s Friday, May 22 at 10AM. We’ll talk some more about those people who failed to keep those promises to you. Alright? See you then.”
Ben left the office feeling a little better about himself which, he thought, was the point of speaking to the doctor in the first place. It felt like progress. He stopped by Hannah’s office and gave her a big hug.
“What was that for!” she gasped, straightening her jacket.
“Just another thank you for connecting me with Dr. Granger.” he grinned.
“I wish all my referrals were this happy!” she grinned back. “Now scoot! I have boring work to do!”
Ben headed home and as he was passing Rochelle’s place he saw her car in the driveway. He thought he might pop in and apologize for the ‘noise’ he made the night before.
He knocked on the door and Jayden answered. Ben didn’t have too many opportunities to speak with the boy. “Good morning Jayden, is your mother home?”
“What’s it to you? It’s not bad enough you sticking your dick in all the bitches on this street you have to come sniffing around after my mom too?” Jayden snarled.
Ben stopped and looked closely at the young man. He was really pissed. Bristling with anger and… jealousy maybe? Perhaps seconds away from physical violence. He’d try to diffuse this.
“I don’t know of any ‘bitches’ living on our street. Your mother happens to be a friend of mine.” Ben said calmly.
“After everything my Mom has been through I am NOT going to let you hurt her by adding her to your conquest list! Fuck off!” the boy said right up in Ben’s face.
Ben took a calming breath but kept his eyes locked on Jayden’s. He didn’t see Rochelle rushing down the hall towards them. “If you want to protect your mother from being hurt, perhaps you should stop emulating the misogynistic behavior of the man who hurt her most!”
That struck home and the boy rocked back. Jayden idolized his father but loved his mother. There was already a conflict he’d buried to protect his image of his father. His jaw dropped and rage filled his eyes. Screaming, he launched himself at Ben. His first punch caught Ben on the side of his jaw. He deflected the second and caught Jayden’s wrist on the third to pull him off his feet and twist him around. Ben pulled Jayden back against his chest grabbing his other wrist and wrapped his arms around him, pinning him to his chest. Ben took them both to their knees so the raging man couldn’t kick him. Jayden screamed his frustration and slammed his head back but Ben had him pinned too low to strike anything painful.
“JAYDEN! STOP IT!” Rochelle screamed.
The young man opened his eyes and saw his mother looking down at him in disappointment. The same look she gave her husband every time she caught him cheating. He closed his eyes tight and thrashed in Ben’s arms weakly.
“Stop hurting your mother!” Ben growled quietly.
“Fuck you!” he spat.
“Jayden! Apologize to Ben!” his mother yelled.
“I’m not apologizing to him! He’s just trying to get you in his bed!” Jayden screamed.
“I’ve already been in his bed!” Rochelle growled.
Jayden froze staring at his mother.
“The difference is Ben likes me. He respects me. He’s my friend. Ben won’t take someone to bed he doesn’t feel that way about and he certainly doesn’t ignore them once he’s bedded them. He’s not trying to score. He’s making a personal connection with another human being. That’s what makes Ben a better man than your father ever was! I loved Devon with everything I had but he’d toss that aside for a quick fuck with a stranger. How do you think that made me feel? What do you think that does to a person’s self-esteem? How do you think the girls you fuck and throw aside feel? Do you even care? You want to be as good a man as your father? You’re aiming too low. BE A BETTER MAN!” She spun and entered her house, slamming the door behind her.
Jayden wasn’t struggling anymore. He’d lost all of his steam. Ben released him and stood up. He held his hand out to help him to his feet but Jayden turned his face away. Ben walked back to his truck and went home. He’d talk with Rochelle later.
When Ben got home Tina rushed to the door to greet him and screeched to a halt when she saw the bruise on his jaw.
“What happened?” she squeaked.
Lori came to the door of the kitchen and saw the bruise as well. “Were you in a fight?” Lisa’s voice from the kitchen called out. “What’s happening?”
Ben hung up his coat and kicked off his boots. He walked into the kitchen with Tina and Lori in tow and Lisa gasped when she saw his face. “Who did that?” she gasped.
“Jayden King.”
“Jayden?” three voices repeated.
“He took exception to my visiting his mother this morning. He accused me of basically being what he is and when I told him to stop acting like his father, POW! right to the jaw. Could someone get me the icepack from the freezer?”
Tina raced over to the fridge and located the icepack. She rushed it over to him.
“Thanks!” he said gingerly placing the icy bag against his jaw.
“Did you hit him back?” Lisa asked.
“No. I just pinned his arms. His mother lit into him about how his behavior with women hurts her and how his father hurt her the same way and that pretty much deflated the boy.”
“He deserves a beating for the way he’s treated women.” Lisa insisted.
“Maybe so but I don’t want that riding on my conscience. The boy loved his father but he had a poor role model. If he can accept that maybe he can turn himself around. As his mother said, be a better man.”
“Go Mrs. King!” Lori smiled.
Ben tried to smile but winced instead.
Tina leaned in to whisper to Ben. “I will take a rain check for tonight’s date. I want us to just relax at home.”
“Thank you Tina.” he whispered back gratefully.
“Ok, they’re whispering to each other. That’s our cue to go home. Thank you for a lovely evening Ben. Hopefully we can do it again, soon.” Lori smiled. She helped her sister to her feet. “Ben, where did we leave my bikini?”
“Damn, our suits are probably still out on the deck.” Ben said attempting to stand. Tina put a hand on his chest to keep him in his seat then went outside to get the suits. Seconds later she was back.
“They are still wet and very cold. I will put yours into a bag to carry home, Lori.” Tina said when she returned.
“Was that all you were wearing when you came over?” Ben asked.
“Yes. That and my robe.” Lori said as she opened the robe and flashed Ben a glimpse of her naked body.
“Hey! No fair! I’m totally dressed!” Lisa whined as she stood next to her sister.
“No teasing!” Ben growled and Lori quickly tied her robe closed.
“It’s almost spring and I had my long winter coat on and my boots so I was warm enough.” Lori said contritely. Ben stood up and walked to the front door. They put their coats on and turned to face Ben.