Days pass by and the council still hasn’t caught Bianca. I’m beginning to think they aren’t even looking for her. I have hardly slept; my mind won’t let me. My mind never gives me rest, fear consumes me. Not fear of her, but fear of who she could take from me. Tobias and Theo take turns going to work, swearing to remain by my side until they catch her and until I have my bloodlust under control. I fear it won’t ever be under control, the more I feed, the more I want. My hunger is insatiable and my darkness ever consuming.
Moving back to my position at the bedroom window, I watch the night pass, time goes by quickly and sometimes, I find myself trapped in my thoughts only to come around and another day has passed. My days seem to blur into one and I honestly have no idea how many days have passed since I returned here.
When the morning rises, Theo walks in, kissing my cheek, forcing my attention to him. “I need to go to work, Tobias has Thaddeus,” he tells me before walking out of the room.
Following him downstairs, I find the house is a mess. For people with nothing but endless time on our hands, we still can’t manage to keep the house clean. Tobias is laying on the couch with Thaddeus on his chest, his eyes closed. I walk over, leaning over the couch and kissing Thaddeus’ head before kissing Tobias’ lips. His eyes snap open, and I realized he dozed off.
“Hey,” he whispers, not wanting to wake up the baby.
“I swear this kid waits until daylight to sleep, I’m so tired.” He yawns. His hair is sticking up at odd angles and he hasn’t shaved in what looks like days, his eyes are also darker as he peers up at me.
I feel like a terrible mother. His words make me feel guilty when I realize Theo and Tobias have been pretty much doing everything while I have a pity party, stuck in my own thoughts and too scared to hold my own son in case my bloodlust kicks in. Walking back upstairs, I find the baby wrap Tobias and Theo have been using. I then look at the contraption I have seen them wear multiple times, yet can’t work out how to put it on. As I walk back downstairs, Tobias opens his eyes.
“What are you doing?” He asks, staring at the baby sling in my hands.
“How does it work? I feel like he will fall out of it,” I tell him.
“You need to tighten the straps at the back,” he says. Standing up, he places Thaddeus in the bassinet next to the couch. “Come here,” he tells me, and I walk over. He tightens the straps, and it feels a lot more secure. I go to grab him out of the bassinet when Tobias touches my arm. I can see the concern in his eyes, he glances at Thaddeus, who is sleeping peacefully. “You should feed first, Imogen.” I feel like he just punched me in the gut. I can feel his apprehension through the bond. He thinks I will hurt him. It hurts knowing they don’t trust me with our own son.
“It’s not that okay, just better to be safe. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I don’t trust you.” He blurts when he feels my mood shift.
“Just feed. Then, I will help you get him in the sling.” I nod and he sits down on the couch before tapping his lap. I walk over and hesitate, Theo isn’t here to pull me off, if I lose control.
Tobias grips my hips, pulling me forward, making me straddle his legs. He kisses my lips before yawning. He looks exhausted, the sleepless nights are taking a toll on him. Tobias shifts and angles his neck towards me, I kiss the side of his neck, my hand rubbing his cheek, his stubble feels rough in my palm. I feel my fangs break through my gums, and I sink my teeth into his neck. Tobias moans loudly from the endorphins in my saliva. I feel his blood flood into my mouth, stopping the burning ache in the back of my throat.
I feel him rub my back, his warm skin making me shiver before I pull myself back. Looking at Tobias, he looks a little buzzed, a lazy smile slipping onto his face. I climb off his lap and eventually, he gets up and helps me put Thaddeus in the sling. He feels heavier, like he has put on some weight as he snuggles into the sling across my chest. I feel Tobias’s eyes on me, watching me carefully, as if he is too afraid to leave me alone with him.
“You good? I can stay up; I just need coffee.” He mumbles out while yawning.
“No, go to sleep, I will be fine. You will feel it if I’m not,” I tell him, and he nods before laying down, his eyes instantly closing.
I look down at Thaddeus, stroking his nose with my finger. “Let’s clean house,” I whisper. Walking into the kitchen I start stacking dishes and cleaning the counters.
The entire day goes quickly, and I finally haul the last load of washing inside, when I feel Thaddeus stir. Tobias is right, his sleep pattern is way out of whack. He sleeps the entire day. I quickly make him a bottle and change his bum when I hear tires on the dirt road.
“That’s daddy,” I tell Thaddeus, while I feed him, waiting to hear the door open. Tobias is still asleep on the couch when I hear, not one but two car doors shut, making me get up.
I walk into the living room just in time to see Caroline, helping Josiah walk into the house. I haven’t seen or spoken to Caroline since before I had Thaddeus, Josiah I haven’t seen in months. He collapses into the armchair with a grunt. Tobias’ eyes fly open as he jumps to his feet. He sighs when he realizes it is just his parents before locking eyes with his father. Josiah looks terrible, his suit is filthy, his hair a mess, he looks exhausted, and I notice he has a slight limp as he walked in. He rests his head back on the chair.