Elisa remembered the string of candied haws when she was seven or eight, while Louis remembered the little crybaby leaning on his back, chewing on candied haws as she spoke.
“Big brother said on TV, ‘If someone saves your life, you should repay them with your body.’ If Elisa can’t get married in the future, can you marry me?”
He found it funny at the time. What was this kid watching all day?
“You can’t even find your way home, do you understand what getting married means?”
Elisa lightly hooked her hand around his neck and said softly, “I’ve grown up, and you’re the first person to buy me candy. No one has been kind to me. The TV says you should marry someone who is good to you.”
“Well, I’ll consider it.”
“Then it’s settled. When I grow up, I’ll find you and marry you!”
He was carrying Elisa on his back at the time. That summer was not hot at all, the breeze felt comfortable on the skin, something that could be remembered for a lifetime.
He didn’t agree verbally, but in his heart, he had already agreed. He wanted to wait for the crybaby to grow up. If she still remembered him and didn’t mind that he was the son of a servant, he would take care of her for a lifetime.
But he forgot about her, not just once but twice.
How could he forget? She was the one who had always been in his heart since he was a child.
During those blank 16 years of his memory, Elisa married Hamish, endured bullying, and finally died on Christmas at the age of 27, burned to death in a fire.
He knew how much Elisa feared pain and how much she loved to cry. She would cry for a long time even if she just got lost and fell in an amusement park. He had comforted her for a long time to stop her tears.
How painful must it have been for the grown-up Elisa, waiting for death in the fire, with no one to comfort her and her tears dried by the flames?
Nine-year-old Deacon liked Elisa.
Twenty-five-year-old Autumn loved Elisa.
Thirty-three-year-old Louis deeply loved Elisa.
Her calling him “big brother” stayed with him for a lifetime. No matter how many times he lost his memory, he would always like her at first sight.
Louis felt a deep, uncomfortable pain in his heart. He had sworn to protect her from the beginning, but he forgot about her, allowing her to be hurt time and time again.
Watching her being taken away by Hamish, watching her fingers being pierced by a thug, watching her fall and cough up blood…
Louis rested his forehead in his hands, not letting anyone see the tears on his face.
He should have remembered earlier. He should have remembered when he went to the orphanage to find out who Autumn was. He should have remembered when he had a series of dreams after the car accident.
He should have remembered when he first saw Elisa.
But he didn’t. Ironically, he even felt jealous and pulled out one of his own teeth, mistaking himself for his own substitute.
Elisa said she couldn’t forget “Autumn.” Autumn was him. Elisa had always remembered the people she liked, and they were all him.
Louis suddenly laughed, then cried and laughed again, taking off his hat and covering his face. If you looked closely, you could see tears on his chin.
He couldn’t wait to go back and see Elisa, to tell her that he was Autumn, and also names Burns’ big brother, the person who bought her candied haws and carried her home when she was young, the person she entrusted her life to in her childhood.
Ivan sat in the front row, feeling an inexplicable chill behind him. He didn’t dare to look back, but he couldn’t help but wonder why Louis was Autumn. Why didn’t he die and why wasn’t he stupid? Why did he become a movie star, and why did he have an untraceable background?
Various questions swirled in his mind, making him even more dizzy. Ivan pursed his lips, unable to stop himself from thinking wildly that it would be great if Elisa hadn’t died.
After more than ten hours, Louis had thought about many things. He began to sort through his memories one by one, checking to see if he had lost any.
When he was shot in the chest and lost consciousness, he didn’t know how he ended up with the White family. Judging by the way the White family treated him, he should be their son. It was useless to delve into what exactly happened now, he just wanted to ask them why they had hypnotized his memory, making him forget Elisa, and had forced him to add a memory that didn’t belong to him, causing him to misunderstand Elisa.
And Elisa. Would shebe happy if she knew he was Autumn? But if she knew that he was the one who chopped off her brother’s hand back then, would she be afraid of him? Hate him? Detest him? Stay away from him?
People always tend to think of the worst outcomes. Louis began to feel restless and anxious. He couldn’t even eat the meal prepared on the plane, just counting the time, enduring.
He took out his phone and scrolled through his past conversations with Elisa, reading through each one to pass the time.
Because he wanted to surprise Elisa, Louis hadn’t told her about his flight today. So, Elisa thought he was still filming, and in her last message, she reminded him to take care and to rest well during the shoot.
The phone was on flight mode, so it was impossible to send a message.
He and Elisa used to exchange messages every day, but now he had finished reading them all so quickly.