Elisa was like a broken record player, stuttering out words that perhaps even she did not know she was saying. Her mind was chaotic, but her heart was even more so.
Her string of words were like stones tossed into the tranquil lake of Hamish’s heart, stirring up ripples that quickly calmed again.
Hamish’s heart ached inexplicably. He glanced at Elisa but Lila’s shadow floated in his mind.
What was Elisa to him? Why would he be afraid of the hypotheticals she raised?
It was a sunny day. Bright sunlight shone through the glass windows, warming up the entire hospital room. Even the shadows in the corners were swept away. But despite the cozy warmth, Hamish broke out in a cold sweat.
He stood up abruptly, gripped Elisa’s gaunt chin and mocked, “Trying to make me go easy on you with your pitiful act? I don’t know if your hypotheticals will come true, but you’ve done wrong. Do you think a few words can erase your past mistakes?”
Elisa was stunned for a second before laughing, “You saw right through me?”
Elisa’s face was half obscured in shadows with her back to the light. Her expression was somewhat obscure.
Just as he thought! Hamish felt relieved to have his guess confirmed. He wanted to reprimand her further but seeing her battered state, like a doll that had been clumsily stitched back together many times, as if she would fall apart with a slight tug, he held back.
“Let’s go back.”
Hamish was unexpectedly not angry, surprising Elisa. She nodded, picking up the bag of medication. The five bottles rattled with the slightest shake.
“What are you carrying?”
What could it be but medication in a hospital? Hamish was clearly asking despite knowing.
“Medicine. My stomach medicine ran out. I also got some supplements,” Elisa replied.
She was even taking supplements now. How weak had Elisa’s health become? Hamish knew she hated bitterness and would rather get injections than take medication. For her to buy so much medicine meant she had reached the point of having no choice but to take it.
Elisa’s knee was injured. Walking caused a stabbing pain. She gritted her teeth and pretended to be fine but hadn’t gone more than a few steps before Hamish swept her up into his arms.
Hamish’s expression was impatient, evidently finding her pace too slow.
The car was parked at the hospital entrance. Hamish put Elisa in the passenger seat, then walked around to the driver’s side and got in.
Elisa buckled her seatbelt and leaned against the window. Head lowered, her long hair tied in a braided bun. Her long, dense lashes like a curled fan, concealing her bright black eyes. Her nose small and upturned. Her lips shapely but colorless.
Time had not marred Elisa’s looks. From their first meeting six years ago until now, time had only washed away Elisa’s girlishness, allowing her to blossom into a different charm. Just sitting there silently was pleasing to the eye.
Elisa stared outside at nothing in particular. Hamish took out a cigarette with one hand and lit it up. Smoking and driving was dangerous, prone to cause accidents.
Smelling the smoke, Elisa wanted to remind him but before she could, Hamish bit down on the cigarette and said, “Hold it in if it bothers you.”
Hamish was unafraid of traffic accidents. He smoked precisely to make Elisa uncomfortable, knowing she hated the smell.
Elisa swallowed her words. The window was open a crack and the wind crept in.
She still wore the hospital gown. The poor quality fabric gaped loosely a size too big. The wind blew in and billowed the gown, making her look very petite, as if she would be blown away at any moment.
Hamish suddenly found the sight of Elisa like this very irritating. He took two puffs before impatiently pinching out the cigarette.
Just then, a family of three passed by the roadside. A tall, robust man had a half-grown child sitting on his shoulders as they fooled around. The woman looked on with a warm smile.
The scene made Elisa stare blankly. Even after they had driven past, her eyes lingered back.
Hamish had also seen them but unlike Elisa, he was looking at the child instead of the couple.
Hamish suddenly recalled an earlier thought – wanting Elisa to bear his child.
After Elisa’s discharge, he had not taken any contraceptive measures when being intimate. Who knew, she might already be carrying his child in her belly.
Once a person had this thought, acceptance came quickly. He seemed eager to see the child that would come from Elisa’s womb.