Arya
After a long bath, I come into the bedroom. Logan isn’t even in the bedroom. I wonder if he is still in the dining room. Is he planning to keep the attitude for the rest of the night?
Five minutes alone in the bedroom, l miss him so much. I just can’t bear the fact that he is in this house but not here with me, or maybe he is avoiding me. Surely I am overthinking this; why would he even avoid me?
I throw on some sweats and go to look for my alpha. In the dining room, I only find the recently traumatized servant putting the room in order.
“Have you seen Log- the alpha?” I ask her, almost calling him by his name.
“No, I haven’t. I didn’t find him here,” she responds.
“Okay, thank you,” I murmur before going back to the stairs toward his office. He can’t be serious about planning to work throughout the night. I hate nights when he does this. I never get to sleep well and it makes me feel useless; I don’t even know why.
In front of his office door, I stand to debate whether I should or shouldn’t. He doesn’t like being disturbed when he is hosting important guests, but he usually informs me in advance so that I don’t cause a major nerve wreck on his side. I have a pretty good number of testimonies about that. Sometimes I find it too difficult to follow his restraining orders.
I close my eyes to concentrate, and sense another scent. He must be meeting someone, but the scent is familiar. His gamma!
I better get the hell out of here. He will come to me when he is done.
I turn to walk back to where I came from, and at the same time, the door clicks open. Kurt gets out and his eyes widen at me. He bows quickly and looks at me. He is one of the few pack members who get to look the alpha and the Luna in the eyes.
“Greetings, my Luna,” he says.
“Greetings to you,” I respond.
“Well, I better get on my way. Goodnight,” he says. I nod and he walks away. Heading back to the door, I peek through. My man is sitting in his chair with his head buried in his hand, on the desk in front of him.
I knock.
“Can I… Um, can I come in?” I end up stammering out of worry, after seeing him like this
“Come in,” his voice is stern. I swallow and then close the door behind me before entering his office.
“I met Kurt on his way out. Is there a problem?” I ask him.
“No, it’s just something concerning business. Nothing that you should worry about,” he responds, straightening himself in his chair and looking at the laptop in front of him. There are images of flames, something burning. When I look closely, it is a ship on the waters which is on fire.
Oh…
I stand there feeling totally useless. I have a burning urge to ask more. What exactly happened? What is that? Is that a ship? Is that your property? Get me out of this hell of curiosity! But I remember Luna Eileen’s words from the night I officially became Logan’s Luna.
“He will tell you what he has to and whatever he doesn’t, it is none of your business and you have no right to question him about it!”
Leaning closely, I wrap my hands around his neck, hoping I can offer some kind of comfort or distraction from whatever is going on.
“I hope it is not that terrible. Are you coming to bed?” I ask, trying but failing to be any less selfish.
“No, sorry, Arya but I have to deal with this before morning. I can’t wait. You go ahead and sleep,” he responds while scrolling down through the pictures.
My fears have come true!
I just want to object or just scream dissatisfaction but I just nod.
“Okay, but don’t work yourself too much. Please come to bed when you get tired, I will be waiting for you,” I feel a stream of words flowing but I have to shut it down. The last thing he probably needs is me wasting his time babbling shit. “I am going to miss you,” I said before leaning down to kiss his lips.
Fuck! I want him!
Shit!
I pull down my sweatshirt and finally walk out.
I hate moments like these.
I stroll to the bedroom and close the door, leaning on it. I stare at my bedroom and it stares back at me. It’s empty and deadly quiet.
I know that Logan is not fine, how am I supposed to enter bed and sleep peacefully? Without him there?
He will come when he gets done, I tell myself, trying to get some motivation to change into my nightwear, I get into bed and close my eyes, willing myself to fall asleep.
I AM STARTLED AWAKE and the lights are still on. Logan always turns them off before he comes to bed. I close my eyes and try to concentrate and I can’t catch a sound, the night is dead silent. I feel so alone… I let go of Logan’s pillow which I have been holding onto for the time I have been in bed.
Logan!
How is he? Is he still working?
I check on the radio alarm on the bedside table. It’s two in the morning. Oh god! I can’t stop worrying.
Finding it too difficult to go to sleep, I get out of bed and head of the bedroom to go and find my man.
I don’t even bother to knock. The lights in the office are still on. Logan’s eyes shoot up at me. They are so red and weary. He has buttoned down his shirt and his necktie is folded behind his laptop. I quickly go to him.
“Baby, come to bed. I can’t sleep. I am worried about you,” I say, touching his shoulders.
I struggle to get between him and me. His desk so that I can sit on his lap with my legs astride his sides. I put my hands on his face to feel him. He leans his face into them, in surrender to his touch. He closes his eyes briefly and then opens them.
“Arya,” he murmurs, his voice hoarse, as if it is so difficult for him to talk.
“Logan, please don’t torture yourself like this,” I beg him, running my hands down his exposed chest, messaging him as I go. He hasn’t even gotten the chance to shower. He just stares into my eyes, as if lost in them.
“Logan, talk to me,” I beseech him, my hands threading through his hair.
“I missed you too baby,” he murmurs, his hands circling my waist.
“Are you coming to bed with me, then?” I ask.
“Arya, this is something that can’t. Our business has been vandalized. The ships that were supposed to bring the construction materials for the Gold refinery have been blown up on the sea. I just can’t figure out who would be doing this or why they would do this to us,” he says.
Oh…
“I am so sorry,” seems like the most appropriate thing to say at the moment.
“No, it’s not your fault,” he murmurs and rubs his hands on his face going into his hair and tugging at the roots.
I stare helplessly at Jim, not knowing what to do.
“You shouldn’t be here, Arya. Please go to bed,” he says.
“No! Don’t push me away like this. I have been there and tried to sleep without you in vain. I can’t stop worrying about you baby,” I tell him, running my hands up to his and threading me to go guess through his.
“I want to be with you. I want to be here for you,” I tell him, pulling him closer so that he can embrace me.
The laptop pings with a notification. Logan’s body tenses up on alert. He cocks his head to the side to check on the screen.
Oh, this is helpless.
I quickly push the laptop closed. Logan glares at me.
“What the hell, Arya?” he growls, his eyes blazing with fury.
“Is it wrong that I am really trying hard to get some attention here?” I squeal, feeling my temper rise.
Fuck him and his goddamned business!
I fumble to get off his lap.
“Fine! I will get out of your space!” I tell before stumbling out of his office. Feeling an overwhelming amount of fury and tears flooding my eyes.
Back in my bedroom. I lean against the door and slide to the floor, letting myself breakdown into tears.
Shit! I hate how emotional Logan makes me! I hate that I have to cry over such stupid issues! I hate myself!
I am supposed to be the strong and tough Arya who never had such kinds of silly girly emotions. What happened to me?
Other times, I would have just run into the woods for a run or probably done some hunting but I am scared of the woods, especially at such an hour, being on my own there… I wouldn’t risk that.
I take in a deep breath, willing myself to calm down and stop crying, but it is just hopeless. I don’t even have the energy to crawl to bed.
After a few minutes, the doorknob clicks and the door pushes against me. There is a swift knob, followed by more pushing. I quickly get up and rub away my tears.
Logan opens the for and stands there looking like a sufferer. My heart aches for him. I quickly throw myself into his arms.
“I couldn’t keep on after you left. I am sorry, baby,” he whispers against my ear.
“No, I shouldn’t have done that. I know it is so selfish of me and you have better things that deserve your time, I am sorry,” I tell him.
“Arya, you are my biggest priority. There is nothing better than you, not even my business. You shouldn’t compare yourself with my work,” he says, running his hand up and down my sides.
He leads me into the bedroom.
“I should first get myself a shower. I promise I will make it quick,” he says, kissing my lips.
“Okay,” I murmur in response. He kissed me once more, before releasing me and heading into the bathroom. That, I can be patient about, as long as I am sure that he is not going to spend the whole night overlooking himself.
He gets out of the shower, with a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair dump. He gets into the closet and comes back dressed in drawstring pants while towel-drying his hair.
He crawls up into bed after switching off the lights and replacing them with the night light. He grabs me by the waist and pulls me into his cool body. I moan feeling the most of peace, being in my mate’s arms, feeling so safe. He smells so good. I place my head on his chest and thread my fingers through his so that I can feel even more connected to him.
“Good night, Arya,” he murmurs into my hair and kisses my temple.
“Good night, Logan,” I murmur back, and my mouth stretches into a yawn. I resist falling asleep until I feel my man’s body go soft and his breathing bone slow and dragged so that I can be sure that he has really slept. A smile of satisfaction forms on my face.
Thank God!
Now I can sleep well, knowing that he is resting. I am grateful for whatever made him change his mind after I left his office. I know I wouldn’t have managed to sleep again knowing that won’t be getting any bit of rest for the whole night.
Holding his hand tightly, I listen to his soft snoring. It is like a lullaby to my sleep. I finally close my eyes, hoping to join my mate in the world of dreams