“You look so perfect standing there
In my American apparel underwear
And I know now, that I’m so down
Your lipstick stain is a work of art
I got your name tattooed in an arrowed heart
And I know now, that I’m so down (hey!). . .”
The unearthly descant, sounding more like a frustrated harangue from a rat that had been starving for months, escaped from Oriana’s mouth as she bounced from one couch to another, the daily newspaper folded into a cylindrical shape, resembling a microphone held in her paws as the music from artistes unknown to Emerald, continued blasting through the speaker, making Emerald’s ear throb from the noise.
She really had no idea how she sounded. Even the grunts from a gravid donkey in labour sounded more bearable than the sounds that left her throat. At some point, she let out something similar to a strangled cry, leaving Emerald to worry if she was perhaps choking on her own saliva.
Emerald wondered if maybe she would have to move out of her own house or perhaps temporarily stay in a sauna to let off some steam of frustration and to just relish in the peace and quiet that clearly Oriana wasn’t qualified to give, at least not anytime soon.
“Let’s get out, let’s get out
‘Cause this deadbeat town’s only here just to keep us down
While I was out, I found myself alone just thinking
If I showed up with a plane ticket
And a shiny diamond ring with your name on it
Would you wanna run away too?
‘Cause all I really want is you. . .”
Her voice came out in a treble screech, almost as if she were cawing. It was a truly unpleasant and torturous sound to be compelled to listen to. Emerald let out a groan as she shut her eyes and inhaled deeply; her body was bouncing gently on the couch she was seated on as Oriana continued to leap from couch to couch in immense ecstasy.
Abruptly, the bouncing and high-pitched shriek came to a halt followed by a loud thump, an ‘oomph’ and a string of rainbow colored profanities. Emerald opened her eyes just in time to see her friend slowly lift herself off the ground while rubbing her head with a small pout on her lips.
She threw an ominous glance at the spot Oriana continued to rub before she adjusted herself to sit properly on the couch after the unceremonious episode her friend had just displayed.
“What weird addiction might you be sporting this week, McStuffins?” Emerald asked blankly, earning a glare from Ori for using her ignominious middle name.
This was already a regular thing with her friend. Every week she always had something new and eccentric to bring to the table. It always turned out to be frustrating and nettlesome most times but Emerald couldn’t deny that these weird habits of Ori’s actually helped to spice up her week one way or the other.
She had thought it was just something that would pass with time but it’s been going on for over a year now and Emerald had come to a conclusion that it was now a part of her friend.
“Addiction? What do you mean?” Oriana’s glare had morphed into a confused expression as she unfolded the microphone model type newspaper and tossed it onto one of the little coffee tables.
“Last week it was some Japanese guy in a mermaid movie and now, it’s some. . . What? Boy band? I used to think it was a monthlies thing just like your mood swings but you couldn’t possibly be on your period for over a year non-stop, could you?” She elucidated.
Oriana rolled her eyes at her friend before grabbing the control for the stereo as she began scrolling through the playlist displayed across the screen of the LED TV.
“Firstly, my sweetheart, Lee, isn’t a Japanese man, he’s Seoulite-a South Korean and most importantly, he isn’t a weekly or monthly addiction like you claim. He’s forever embedded in my heart,” she said with a dreamy sigh as her eyes held a longing look.
Typical Oriana.
“Secondly, 5 Seconds Of Summer isn’t just an ordinary boy band, it’s a group of four drool-worthy, basically walking sex gods and I still can’t believe you don’t know them,” Emerald rolled her eyes in response, choosing not to say anything.
‘What happened to Lee is forever embedded in my heart?’ Emerald thought.
Now Oriana was practically drooling all over as her eyes glazed over. She conservatively held to her chest, the pack containing the compact disk of their songs, both old and new as she continued scrolling through the album.
All of a sudden, she turned her head towards Emerald, completely ignoring the existence of a bitch named ‘whiplash’ as her eyes were wide open in excitement and her feet bounced against the floor. Emerald could sense the giddiness roll off her friend in waves as she looked like she had made the biggest discovery in the world, or rather, she looked like she had been told that Lee Min Ho was coming to pay her a visit.
“Mera! Do you know that good girls are just bad girls that haven’t been caught yet?” She shouted, a huge smile playing at her lips.
Emerald wasn’t at all fazed by what her friend had said. She knew she must have gotten that saying from somewhere but deciding to play along for now, she asked,
“Really? Wow! How did you come up with that?” She tried to sound enthusiastic but she couldn’t keep the ennui from seeping through her voice.
“Oh, I came up with it myself. You’ve gotta admit, I am pretty smart,” her smile had been replaced by a proud smirk and a smug expression.
Time to burst her bubble.
“Hmm. . . You sure? Because I’m quite certain I heard the exact same line from one of your walking sex gods’ songs,” Emerald remarked as she watched the smug look drop from Oriana’s face and her cheeks turned pink from being caught lying.
“Well. . . I. . . Uhm, the thing is I-”
“Ori, stop. You don’t have to steal some mediocre line from a movie, song or from anywhere for that matter just to impress me or prove to me that you’re smart. I mean you work for a bloody news agency for Christ’s sake and you’re not just anybody there, you’re one of the people that help in gathering these juicy news updates we read, see and hear every single day.
“You’re perfect at your job and if that doesn’t show that you’re smart, I have no idea what else would. You’re the smartest girl I know, Ori so don’t you dare belittle yourself, you hear me?” She heartened Oriana who gave her a grateful grin in reply.
Emerald smiled before her eyes darted to the slight bump that was beginning to protrude out of Ori’s head where she had earlier fallen. She knew her friend wouldn’t remember to treat the bump and tomorrow, she would try to use some makeover to shield its brutal existence.
She sighed before getting up and walking into the kitchen. Opening the refrigerator, she grabbed the icebag and simultaneously reached for the Ziploc filled with the chocolate chip cookies her mother had baked for her and Ori before walking back to the living area and tossing the icebag at Oriana.
“Use that if you don’t want to appear at work tomorrow with a growing purple horn,” she settled on the couch before taking a bite out of a cookie, stifling a satisfied moan at how delicious it tasted.
Her mother was an excellent chef and baker and her meals couldn’t be more mouthwatering considering the fact that she had a well known restaurant down in Boston and Luca, her boyfriend, was also glad to help by being in charge of the Italian dishes section.
“Speaking of work, considering the fact that you seem overly joyful today and not carrying about your grumpiness, which has been going on for about a week and a half now, I’m guessing you guys now have something to publish?” She asked as she watched Oriana slip down the couch onto their vintage red, black, white and grey rug, placed right in the middle of the living room, before reaching for the Ziploc bag to grab a cookie.
“Hmm. . . We mfwinally hanve swome weally juishy infwormatiom. Youm hamve mo idea how hamppy everyone wams todaw, ewsmecially Mr-”
“Ori! Manners. Swallow before you speak,” Emerald scolded as she shot Oriana a glare, putting an end to her misery.
She couldn’t take it anymore. Unable to understand what her friend was saying, coupled with the horrible sight of saliva and cookie particles spouting out of Ori’s mouth together with her jumbled words didn’t sit well with her.
Passing Emerald a sheepish look, Oriana swallowed while rubbing the icebag against the side of her head, mumbling an apology.
“So what were you saying?” Emerald finally asked, making herself comfortable on the couch by sitting with her legs crossed underneath her body. Bending towards the side of the couch, she reached for her water bottle sitting on the floor before taking sips; her eyes were still trained on Oriana who was starting to reach for another cookie.
“I was saying that we finally have something juicy to publish and you wouldn’t believe who had dug up the piece of information!” She exclaimed, her eyes gleaming as she was unable to sit still. She was practically bouncing on her butt, giving Emerald an expectant look as if prodding her to ask ‘who’ had.
“Uhm. . . You?” Emerald answered uncertainly.
“Me! I did! You have no idea! After spending the entire afternoon wandering around Battery Park, I decided to take a break at some cafe, which looked exquisite by the way. I was sipping my iced tea when two guys and a lady walked in.
One of the guys looked really nerdy with his big glasses and his oversized knitted sweater which looked like something his grandma would make for him for Christmas-an ugly Christmas sweater, if you may-while the other guy looked really good.”
“So you were ogling on the job?” Emerald snickered.
“I wasn’t ogling, I was observing, plus it’s what I was asked to go do. Besides, you can’t blame me for admiring God’s creation, such man candy. He looked hot, he was tall with quite an amazing build. His blue eyes were just so heavenly and oh! his hair was just spec-”
“Ori! Focus.”
“Sorry. So as I was saying, when they got seated and placed their orders, they began talking and I couldn’t help but eavesdrop on their conversation and I assure you it’s not because I wanted to hear what angel eyes sounded like.
They were talking about some wine company in Napa valley and as their discussion went on, I figured out that they were actually employees working in J. K. Empire and they were talking about the J. K. wine industry in California,” she gushed as she swayed her hands, gesturing enthusiastically.
“And bam!” She suddenly slammed the newspaper against her left hand, making the abrupt noise reverberate round the living room.
When had she even picked that up?
“That was how I found out that a new type of wine would be released in a few weeks. Not exactly certain about when it would be out but the first batch should be ready for the world in two to three weeks. This is the perfect scoop, Mera and when I had reported back to Mr. Hyde, he had been elated.
Fucking euphoric that he had actually pecked both my cheeks multiple times! Everyone was ecstatic, yeah some were jealous especially Botox Barbara but I don’t give a fuckity fucking fuck! Mera, do you know what Mr. Hyde said? Do you?!” She shouted as she jumped to stand in front of Emerald.