CATRIONA
I glared down at Sandra wide-eyed not believing what she’d just said! I laughed out loud …..
“Why are you laughing?” She asked with a little chuckle.
Don’t you see that what you said is funny? Jayden never told me that everyone in this house can talk to one another through their minds. And even if so, he would have replied to me or alert me. But he didn’t do any of that. He would’ve….. I stopped the chuntering when I saw the solemnity in Sandra’s phiz.
Catriona, Alpha didn’t tell you everything about us. She said, What are you trying to say? Is what you said all true? She nodded. Does it mean that everybody in this house heard everything I blabbed? She nodded. “Like EVERYTHING?” She nodded. I furrowed my face, feeling ashamed and embarrassed.
Sandraaaa….. if Jayden remained silent, intentionally, at least you could’ve alerted me if you knew. Now how am I going to face him? Ohh, he would’ve killed me if I blabbed the surrogacy things. I said in my head. Anyway, thank you for these. I’ll go and take a shower. I said and slammed the door shut.
Catriona, wait before you go….
I opened the door again. “What is it Sandra? I asked her serenely.
Before Alpha blocked the link, I had you saying the name Gabriel! Do you by chance know him? She asked. I nodded. She widened her eyes. Catriona, do you know who he is? She whisper-shout. Sandra let me take a shower first before you lecture me about Gabriel. I closed the door, locked it and went to the bathroom.
Do I know him? Yes, I do know him. A little bit though. I know he’s a werewolf too as you all are. But then, I still have unanswered questions about the fact that I might be Gabriel’s mate too. If that fact is true, then I am sure I will go crazy about this werewolf community. Should I buy a werewolf book? Or just Google it and find some answers, so that I’ll be able to know what to expect when something horrendous happens? I entered the shower and showered. After that I dried myself and used a clean tampon. Thank God the blood is very light and little. I went into the closet and applied bits of body oil onto my body. I stood tall looking through the wardrobe thinking of what to wear. I think I should wear a black jeans and a black tank top. Yes, it’s a good choice Catriona. Let’s do that. I pulled up my jeans and stood in front of the full length mirror. I looked at my reflection and touched my belly…
“Was I dreaming and hoping for too much? There was nothing that had ever gone right in my life. Going through a lot growing up was already too much. Didn’t I deserve a little happiness of becoming a mother at least? Didn’t i? I didn’t even get the chance to know what their genders were? Were they boys, or girls? Was it a boy and a girl? Was this my fault? Was I the one that killed them? If i listened to Jayden and stayed in the house the whole time, the babies would have still been in my womb. But still, I wanted to be close to my brother. He needed me. I couldn’t just ignore him just because I was pregnant. He’s the only family I have. It’s not my fault my babies that you left me….. And your dad of course. “Right? Forgive me. Okay.
I tilted my head up to stop the tears from running down but some drops escaped. I grabbed my bra to put it on and that’s when I had a knock.
“Who could that be? Is it Sandra again? Did she really come back to lecture me about Gabriel? She knocked on the door continuously. I grabbed my tank top and a black bra and yanked them on. Sandra kept on knocking as I rushed toward the door.
If you don’t have patience, please eliminate the door and enter with it. I told her as I unlocked it. I open the door, still irritated by her little behavior. All my attention was on my unfixed tank top, fixing it very well.
What’s with you San… My eyes almost popped out when I saw that it wasn’t Sandra but Jayden. Jayden, what are you doing here? I asked and then regretted the question. Sorry. I said.
“Why would I eliminate my door? He asked. I wished for the ground to swallow me. I’m sorry, I thought it was Sandra. I said without looking him in the eyes. The embarrassment is killing me.
Did you do something wrong for you to ignore my eyes? He asked.
I excused myself wanting to run and lock myself somewhere but he grabbed my hand gently. Don’t run away. Is this another habit of yours to run and lock yourself? He asked. Lord, why is he making it so difficult for me to peacefully breathe?
I wasn’t running away! I was…. I was just …..
Let’s have a word. He said and took me into the bedroom after locking the door.
I bought you a new phone. You’ll be using mine until the one I bought for you arrives. He said. Why did you buy me a phone when I didn’t tell you to? I had to. He said. You didn’t have to do that. I have my own money. And I was thinking about buying it tomorrow. I said. I cleared my throat, is it about what I said earlier? Did you really hear me? I asked. Let’s put that aside Catriona. Are you hungry? He asked, changing the topic. No, I am not. I answered. It’s getting late and you haven’t eaten anything since morning. He said. I lost my appetite.
Why did you lose your appetite? You’re not going to die here of hunger just because you lost your appetite. He said arrogantly.
Seriously Jayden, how can you talk to me like that? I lost my two babies four days ago, and that was within a day. Aren’t you affected at all? Just because I’m acting strong, doesn’t mean I am not torn. You’re not a woman so you won’t understand or know how it feels to have a miscarriage. But for heaven’s sake Jayden, you and i made them together. I told him.
He looked down at me with hurt in his eyes. I looked away feeling my tears coming. He touched my shoulders and turned me around to face him. I looked up at him….
Catriona, don’t ever talk like that. Yes, I am not a woman and am not interested in being one. I may not know how it feels to miscarry a child and I’ll never know or get that experience, but don’t forget that I was their father who wanted them the most. I’m a werewolf Catriona, a werewolf Alpha who has thousands of people that lean on me. I am also hurt as you are. But I am consoling myself because I don’t want to be a crybaby in front of my people.
Let’s say that it wasn’t the right time for them to come to us. Or that they were not ready to come to us. He said. I pried away his hands and sat down on the bed.
No, I think it was a sign for me to leave this house. He sat down next to me. “What are you talking about? He asked.
I was blinded that time when you told me that I’d be in the babies’ lives. I was blinded with delight and forgot who I was or I am. The more I stay in this house, the more problems I’ll bring to you and to this house. The miscarriages i had had opened up my eyes. I have to go back to my own world. It will hurt me to see you getting hurt because of me. It will kill me watching your people die because of me. You are the first man I have ever had in my life. You are my first love. And because I love you, I have to leave.
What are you saying Catriona? Be specific and realistic with me. Why would they die because of you?
Are you saying that no one has died in this house? He stared at me confused. “Jayden, I know that one of those two old grannies died. Isn’t that what you were talking about downstairs with your people? He widened his eyes and then went silent. I lightly laughed with fear when I saw his expression.
“Am I right, or wrong ? I asked him.
Catriona, how did you know? Was it Sandra? Was she the one who told you?
No, she wasn’t the one. Then who told you? How did you know, because she’s the only one you’re close to? And I restricted them from telling you anything. He said.
Jayden, I knew. Now, before your house turns into a death and hateful chaos, allow me to leave, silently.
No, you’re not going anywhere. I won’t let you. Yes, you’re right, Vivian died, but she deserved it. You are my mate and you are to stay beside me forever. Nothing is going to separate me from you. “NOTHING!” He Said.
I was moved to his words but then collected myself. Don’t talk like that Jayden, you don’t know anything.
No, you are the one who’s wrong Catriona, I do know everything. I know that whoever hurts you to the extent of death dies.