I was as well hurt by her reaction, but I understood her situation. She’s protective of her family and I can’t possibly hold that against her, but I wish her family cared about her as much and help me put an end to her problems.
“I’m so sorry, forgive me. I just… can’t help seeing my family in any kind of situation that demands they have to beg for anything. Thank you for being so considerate and willing to help me and my family out. I don’t think I’ve done anything to deserve such kindness from you.” she confessed relieved, completely ignoring my last statement.
But it was still satisfying knowing that she wasn’t upset any more. And I like how she says what she’s feeling at the moment without pretence. I love that the most about her.
“Well, the day you thoughtlessly saved my life was the day I decided I belonged to you. That was all you had to do to get me fighting all your battles and wars. But I would have fallen for you regardless, because you are incredible in every way.” I cited with much pleasure.
And she smiled. God! I love that breathtaking smile of hers, it always gladdens my heart. I want her to smiling genuinely more often, and I want to be the one to bring that smile back to her face.
She soon noticed me staring at her and blushed as she cleared her throat to ask casually,
“So, what’s the plan? I want to help out in any way I can.”
I was a bit surprised by her sudden interest, but I expected nothing less from Penelope Xiang. She is a fighter who won’t go down without a fight.
“You’re really amazing, you know that right? But before I reveal my awesome plan to you, may I rip to shreds this resignation letter of yours? It’s still freaking me out.” I requested honestly, but she quickly dragged it away from my hand.
“I think I should keep it. Who knows when I might need it again?” she teased, but I smiled slyly.
“The only time I’ll accept a resignation letter from you is when I know I’ll always come home to see you everytime- when I see my ring resting on your finger, and know that my vows are resting in your heart as well” I cited.
I noticed her face getting even redder as she turned away and walked out of my office hastily.
I couldn’t help the laughter that escaped my mouth. For some reason, seeing Penelope shy away from me in embarrassment made me happy and totally satisfied.
My feelings for he keeps me going, and at this point I doynt think there’s anything I wouldn’t do for her to be happy.
Livy
When Markian burst through my door, I really thought he was coming to hurt me even more with his words.
But he kissed me instead with so much pain- so much fear and a hint of hopefulness? like he was betting everything he had to give just this one kiss.
So, I couldn’t resist- I didn’t want to, I just let our feelings flow through the kiss.
When he released me from the kiss, I dreaded the emptiness that filled me again when I noticed a faint smile tugging his lips.
At first I thought he just teased me with the kiss, so the normal reaction for me was to try and explain myself.
“Markian, I…” I started but he shut up.
“You’ve suffered enough my Love, but I promise you I’ll put an end to all these- soonest.” He assured confidently before kissing me again.
This time was with a whole different feeling of hunger and passion. My husband is the only man that can send me into a panic one minute and in the next, he is rescuing me from my damnation.
After everything that had happened, I really thought Markian hated me again like before. I feared he had gone back to his old mean self and wouldn’t give a damn about me since Sophia was back, but I was wrong.
The fact that he’s right here with me meant the entire world to me. I couldn’t possibly handle all the emotions I was feeling alone and I needed answers- some clarity at least. So, I pulled away from the kiss.
“I thought you hated me so much you didn’t even want to see me? You even refused to eat anything since yesterday, I was so worried. Why would you do that to me?” I asked shamelessly as I stared into his eyes.
And for the very first time, Markian’s eyes were reflecting the bareness of his soul. He hid no emotion, he was completely open and I saw my mistakes.
“I was hurt that you don’t trust me enough to share any of your pain or sadness with me. I was devastated when I found out I was the last to know about all you’ve been going through. I was mad with anger because no matters to how much I showed that I’m capable of protecting what’s mine, you never once thought to put your trust in me… You made me feel like an incompetent man and husband.” he replied sadly and I was baffled.
I had no idea what concerned me mattered to him this much. I didn’t know keeping him in the dark was going to hurt him that much. I only wanted to protect him from worrying about me and my problems.
“Oh… no, Markian. You are far from incompetent. I thought I was protecting you from my problems, but I was wrong. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you things I should’ve told you about. And for lying to you about everything, I’m very sorry.” I cited in tears as I cupped his face with shaky hands.
But he moved away from me and sat on the bed tiredly. He brushed his hair away from his forehead backwards with his fingers, frustrated.
“And about when you wanted to leave? You were ready to leave me, to just abandon me and disappear without a single thought of how I would survive without my heart. Damn, Livy. Do you even love me?… or in the midst of everything you decided I wasn’t even worth the trouble?” he asked upset.
I took a step towards him on the bed and countered, “Of course I do. Markian, I Love You. I love you so much i feel like I might die at the mere thought of not being by your side…”
“But you would have still left me! You would have packed your bags and disappear from my life just like my mother did! I hate you for making me doubt if my love was worth anything to you at all. You were going to leave me and I’m not sure I’ll ever recover from such insecurity, so I hate it…” he cited bitterly.
Then it dripped on the floor- Markian’s tears. I couldn’t bear to hear him say he hated me, but his words were hurting him more.
I moved closer to him furiously in an attempt to stop him from uttering anymore hurtful words.
“Don’t say you hate me! Don’t you ever say that again… Of course your love is worth everything to me, it has kept me going till this very minute, so don’t say you hate me. I couldn’t dream of leaving you, Markian- but what was I supposed to do? When we first got married, Sophia was in your heart and in your mind. Like hell you even told me you forgave her infidelity numerous times…”
“I said that because I wanted you to know that I’ll love you no matter what you do or say” he interrupted, clarifying my misunderstanding.
“… you said you’d never love me so, what was I supposed to think when Sophia returned?! My heart was breaking with every thought that I’ve lost you again, and it would’ve been just a matter of days before my body breaks down too. I didn’t want you to have to choose between my sister and I, so I thought I’d make it easier for everyone and leave once she was settled. I had the protect the little part of me I could salvage.” I ranted sadly and mad.
I was upset, but not at Markian. I was mad at myself for only thinking and insinuating that Markian would leave me. Honestly, I had no faith in him and that is wrong of me.
He just sat there and stared at me in disbelief. I would give a penny for his thoughts right now if I could.
“So, you still don’t understand how I feel about you?” he asked rhetorically, but I answered anyways.