I could never smile like she or Sophy does, at least not with the weight of guilt on my shoulder.
“I thought with Markian in New York, you would’ve come pay your mother a visit more regularly. My home isn’t only meant for your lover’s quarrel and reconciliation you know.” She stated unfocused as she continued with her work.
“I’m sorry. I’ve just had a lot to take in and do before Markian returns. Mom?… I need to tell you something” I requested, getting back her attention.
She looked at me with concerned eyes as she closed the file she was looking at.
“Of course, honey. What is it?”
“The reason why I haven’t come to see you after Markian travelled was because, I’ve had to handle something- someone actually. The day you woke up from your coma, I saw Sophia” I revealed receiving a raised brow from her.
I could tell she was surprised, but with Judy her poker face is unbeatable.
“So, the person I saw 2days ago was…”
“Yes mom, it was Sophia. Your daughter, our Sophy. I wanted to tell you, but I was afraid of the consequences. I knew what her return means for me, to you, and to the Winfreys especially Markian. So, I sheltered her, and gave her a job at Markian’s mansion.” I testified sadly.
Who knew my mother would still be calm after my revelation? She just relaxed her back on the chair and folded her arms.
“So, let me get this straight… You gave your dead sister- who surprisingly isn’t dead- a place to sleep and a job in your home, and you don’t see anything wrong with that? Why exactly would you do that? Did she ask you to?” My mother questioned with disappointment written all over her face.
“Mom, she is my sister- your daughter, who needed help and has no memory” I stated confused as to my mother’s reaction.
“Exactly, she came back without memories and needed help, but surprisingly she only knows you. In the state’s record, Sophia Markian Winfrey is dead. You really don’t see what’s wrong with that picture?” She asked harshly to my dismay.
“As a matter of fact I don’t. I’m just trying to do what I think is right here and I will, no matter what it may cost me. And I wouldn’t be so clueless if you had not decided to wipe my memory, mother.”
“Oh please… these has nothing to do with you lost memory, but the guilt you’ve been feeling. This is clearly you being manipulated by your sister all over again” my mother stated.
What?! I can’t believe these. I’m a fool to think things have changed between my mom and I when clearly nothing have.
“It’s you who have always tried to manipulate me to take control of the Luthel empire and your beloved throne at the Verc against my will. How can Sophia be manipulating me when she doesn’t even have her memories?” I requested to know.
Sophy got more privileges from Judy- and was clearly her favorite, but to think my mother would be the least excited of her return was just unbelievable.
“That’s what she told you that she can remember anything, right? Then if that’s really the case, you have to be the one who remembers what happened that night.” She suggested taking me aback.
“And how do I do that? Dr Joe is dead! And to think you’re asking me remember what happened when it’s your fault that I can’t remember anything in the first place, is just unbelievable. I- came to you severally to return them back to me, but you just couldn’t let go of that one tool you use in manipulating me, could you? Yes!… maybe it’s guilt. Guilt that a sister I vowed to protect may have almost died by my hand. Guilt that no matter how much I lose, i feel it won’t be enough because I have no idea what I’m guilty of. It’s funny how the memories were taken but the guilt remained” I said in bitterness.
My eyes are already starting to hurt from my mascara that was mixing with my tears.
“They’re not truly gone… I never erased your memory of that night, you just couldn’t remember what happened when the police arrived there. You were frantic and talking hysterically, that I had to erase what little memory you had of that night- that’s all. You choose to forget, but now you have to remember. It of nobody’s benefit if this guilt drives you into making stupid decisions… my goodness” my mother exclaimed like she just got a revelation.
“So, you took credit- even though you had nothing to do with it, just to control me?” I asked even though I knew the answer.
“I wanted leverage against you, something strong enough to make you see the bigger picture. Being a Luthel isn’t rosy as i portray it to be. And by now I’m sure you know that there’re forces- people who smile to your face but hold a dagger behind you back and waiting to strike you. If I had left you without any protection during my coma, those wolves would have devoured you” she stated with concern.
“And now I have to protect my sister. What if they find her vulnerable and alone, they will use her against us. I know you’re doubtful of her intentions, and so was I. But you know that Sophia will resent us if she eventually regains her memories but we’re not by her side. Let’s trust and protect her, that’s the lest I can do- please” I pleased from all my heart.
If it’s guilt driving me, then there’s no telling how far I’ll go. But one thing is for sure and that’s, Sophia is back to stay and I’ll do my best to give her back all that was hers.
The next day, Markian returned to my uttermost surprise and dismay.
He said he would be gone for 2weeks, but it’s just been a week and I was panicking. I guess even the universe is siding with Sophia once again.
I stared at him from the window of the drawing room as he walked inside the house. I held my hands tightly together as my heart pounded heavily in my ear.
I quickly went out of the drawing room into ours, and with each footstep he took as he was walking through the hallow hall, my level of nervousness increased.
God, please… give me strength just this once, I silently prayed.
As soon as the doors swung open, my heart skipped beats. I saw him last night and spoke to him this morning, but he didn’t mention he was returning today.
The moment his eyes fell on me, it was undeniable he was forcing himself to stay focused and calm. I walked up to him to take a better look- I felt like giving him a hug but I held onto my arms instead.
“You sure know how surprise a woman, you know that right? And to think that we spoke on the phone just this morning but you didn’t mention that you were returning early…” I said with a hopeless smile that couldn’t hide the tears forming in my eyes.
Oh no, not again. Haven’t I practiced ‘not crying’ enough? My eyes were seriously getting blurry with tears when I felt a warm kiss on my lips that set my heart on fire.
Markian kissed me a longing and sadness it was hard to ignore, so I kissed him back. Dammit! This is torture.
I have to stop this so, I broke off from the kiss but he drew me in to his warm embrace instead.
“I missed you too- so much you can’t imagine. Thank you for loving me… Livy, I love you” Markian confessed out of the blue, totally confusing me.
I love him so much and I miss him, but what was he thanking me for that? I broke away from the embrace to look at his face. Boy, am I gonna miss this face.
“How was your trip? And why are you back so early?” I asked seriously now.
Honestly, I was afraid if I hold on for even a second longer, I might lose all willfulness to stay away from him.
“I couldn’t stay away from you for more than 7days. I tried, but it felt like I was going mad missing you. So, I did the major part i was supposed to play and flew Marcel over to New York to handle the rest.” He replied.