MEGAN
“WHY THE fu—” I yelped in my seat with wide eyes. Forrest was already towering me over my desk and pinning me with a deadly glare. “Why did you—” he hissed. His voice was deep and strong with anger.
With my heart leaping in my throat, I blinked and gathered my posture. “You shouldn’t be here if you didn’t come for your appointment. I am working, can’t you see it?”
Thankfully, the patient for ten came early, and I had the chance to get away from angry and intimidating Forrest.
“She’s ready to see you,” I told the red-head woman, then I got myself busy rechecking the calendar, sharpening pencils, and cleaning my desk with wipes even though there was nothing to clean.
“Stop ignoring me, please?” He lowered his voice, then huffed a frustrated breath.
“Oh, spare me. And I don’t have time for your outburst.”
“I was worried about you last night.” He leaned in, his face was still tightened. Was that all? Do I look so pathetic that in need of rescuing all the time?
I lifted my chin to meet his gaze. The message was quite clear; genuine concern and sadness etched in those dark eyes. He scanned my face before he met my gaze again. So much for not staring at him because frack me, he got me there. I almost softened with sympathy. Yeah, he was a bit rough around the edges, but that was what I admired him for, besides being sexy and extremely hot.
He swallowed, perhaps he saw these unsated needs in my eyes.
My skin prickled with the urge of kissing him to erase the scowl on his face and the torment filling in those orbs.
The tension between us was still tangible. There was no denying that he still wanted me. Hell, I wanted him.
I shook that thought aside no matter how appealing it would be. What happened last night was still causing me a searing pain to my chest.
“Shouldn’t you be with your mother and your fiancée at this time? Spending some time over a cup of tea.”
“I was worried. I left you tons of messages when you didn’t pick up my call.”
“I thought the worry part was pretty convincing, Forrest. Leave me alone, and I am working to pay my bills. Unlike you, I can’t afford to lose my job again, to be kicked out of my apartment, and I certainly can’t afford to buy a penthouse.”
“Why did you leave just like that?”
I chuckled mockingly. “Come on, don’t lay your dumb card on me now. You were lip-locking with your fiancee. What were you expecting? I would just stay there and wait for you until you were done sticking your tongue down her throat? You are engaged for God’s sake. As much as I love to have steamy sex with you, don’t get me wrong, it was amazing, but I don’t sleep with a committed man.”
“Meg—”
I raised my hand to stop him from continuing whatever crap he cooked up. I stood up and crossed my arms over my chest. “I thought you don’t like to see women get hurt, especially when you were there and couldn’t do anything, yet you cheated her on me. On purpose. For a guy so holier-than-thou like you, don’t you think that’s a little bit bizarre?”
Forrest drew a deep noisily breath through his nose and shook his head, then he stared at me for a couple of seconds. He was beyond pissed. Good to know because the feeling was mutual.
“And here I thought you don’t do relationship, then I just found out you are freaking engaged. How do you call shocking in British?” I pointed my finger at him. “Gobsmacking! Oh, I must have been so presumptuous the whole time and assumed that you were not in a relationship. For some reason, I felt guilty. This is why I don’t sleep twice with the same man because it only complicates every damn thing.”
“Then why did we end up sleeping together?” His question caught me off guard. Forrest looked tormented—more than before. He desperately wanted an answer even though he knew it without asking me.
“Because I thought you are better than most men, but it was wrong for me to surmise. Well, you just hit a home run in getting into my pants, Forrest. Congratulations! Pop some confetti. Yay!”
“That’s not why we slept together, and you of all the people should know that.”
I snorted though it pained me as the reality was still showing up. I was hurting because I liked him a lot, and I wasn’t ready to end what we had. “It’s not that I didn’t enjoy it with you, but you’re a cheater.”
He forced a laugh. “Did you see Meadow rushing toward us to accuse me of cheating on her?” Well, that didn’t cross my mind “Look, Megan, I love Mama so much. The moment I heard her voice in my living room, I forgot everything, especially when I saw her pain. She’d been through hell, and the last thing I wanted for her was to hurt her, yet I just did.”
“Well, I am not your Mama, and she doesn’t look like she’d been through a lot though. She looks perfect to me.”
He sighed. “You don’t wanna get my point, Megan. That’s your problem.”
Because you hurt me, asshole!
My eyes narrowed. I felt closer to crying. As much as I liked his idea, he didn’t deny he had a fiancée, and that hurt a lot. “Then forgive me for not seeing the bigger picture here.” Or more likely I chose not to. “Now that you see me I’m unscathed, can you please leave now? I’m not in a patient mood.”
“Jesus, Megan. Do I have to spell it for you?” He drew a breath and swore. “I don’t want her to feel that pain again, and the same thing for you. That’s the last thing I want you to go through still, I’ve unintentionally caused it to you. That’s why I am here, that’s why I’m worried and damn it, you’re right, I should be spending time with them because they’re leaving soon, but I chose to come here to see you. I couldn’t think straight, and I haven’t been able to get some sleep knowing you left me without a word.”
“Well, I’m fine.” Stubborn as hell, I just rolled my eyes.
“Megan.” I stepped back when he reached out. The desk was the only thing that separated us, I knew how it felt perfect when I was with him and I didn’t want to hold on to his touch and his promising words because I couldn’t trust myself around him anymore.
“Megan, I am far from perfect, you know that, but I want to be a good person for you.” He gave me one long pained look before he broke eye contact. He then nodded slowly before he spun away, leaving me alone shell-shocked with regrets.
Drained, I slumped my ass back to my chair, weighing what happened last night and his words today. Still, there were a lot of things to reconsider, and I would only get hurt in the process if I would listen to my stupid hormones than my brain.
When Mom’s patient left, she came out of her office, staring at me, then she sighed. “I couldn’t help to not eavesdrop. So, it’s you then, huh?”
“What it’s me then?”
“Never mind, but trust me, Meggie. Forrest is not the type of person who will cheat on someone. I can’t share with you beyond this, but he’s right. His mother is the only person who matters to him until you come into his life.”
Again, I was left stunned with regrets.
***
I couldn’t sleep, no matter how hard I tried. I reread all his messages, hoping I would get bored. The more I reread them, the more I felt hollow and aching. As stupid as it sounded, I missed him.
I went down to the kitchen and grabbed a box of cereals and fresh milk.
It was past twelve. Mom was sleeping, and here I was, wide awake, drowning with guilt. I shouldn’t be feeling like this, and it sucked that he didn’t stop her from kissing him and didn’t deny the fact that they were engaged.
He made himself clear of not sharing me with someone else, yet I shared him with Meadow.
“Damn you. Why do you have to be so hot and unavailable?” I forcefully shoved the cereal in my mouth, lazily chewing with a long sigh. “Why does it have to be you?”
I’d been in a relationship once in high school. I was not a jealous type, but with him, I saw what I saw, and judging by it, they were in a long-term relationship.
I had closer to have a headache from overthinking. “Gah, I hate you, heart!”
At the corner of my eye, I caught a silhouette of a man behind the window. Goosebumps erupted all over my skin. I swallowed hard, hurriedly sliding off the stool. Trying not to create any noise, I gently pulled the drawer, grabbed a knife, and waited.
The male silhouette was moving, and I was thankful he had to break the glass before he could get in, and thanks to my Mom, there was a security system installed in this house.
Startled, my heart was officially in my throat by a knock on the window, then a faint deep voice followed, somewhat whispering my name.