OLIVIA’S P. O. V.
I don’t even know where to begin to think about what Victor said. Then there is Peter and Benjamin. What the hell is going on? I go from everyone hating me to people kissing me left and right. How am I supposed to deal with all of this? I need some time alone to think. That isn’t happening right away though. Peter and Benjamin want to do their study times. I am just starting to think that this is just an excuse to have alone time with me. Goddess can’t anything ever be simple.
Now, I am sitting here in Peter’s house waiting for him to get his book from the bedroom. We had an argument about it. I have reached a conclusion that I need to set some boundaries with these guys. No more bedroom talks. No matter what. I am sitting at the kitchen table when he comes down the stairs.
“No,” He plainly states.
“No, what?”
“I am not sitting in those chairs while we study. Couch.” Peter heads to his living room.
“Fine.”
I joined him on the couch. Then he pulls me next to him. “I want to talk first.” He pulls my chin so that I am facing him.
“What do you want to talk about?” He has turned all serious on me.
“Did you kiss Victor?” No beating around the bush I guess.
“Yes, it was a last request kind of thing.” I try to shrug like it’s no big deal.
“And that leads to you being friends with him again. After every thing that he has done to you?” He slides his arm around my back.
“Well, I guess it leads to more discussions and then friendship. We used to be best friends. I guess it is kind of nice to have that back.” I try to look away but he holds my face.
“I need to know one more thing.”
“What is that?” It comes out as barely a whisper.
“How you taste.” Then Peter’s lips come crashing into mine. I swear he is even more needy. He pulls and grabs at my clothes. Then he starts leaning me back until I am laying on the couch, with him over me. I responded back. What is wrong with me? Now he is starting to grind into me. I have to stop this. He breaks away from my mouth only to trail down my neck.
I make matters worse, I moan. This increases Peter’s need. Goddess I really am a slut. I grab Peter’s shirt. “Peter.” He moans back at me. “Peter, stop.”
“I can’t, you taste so good.” He mumbles into my skin.
I moan back at him. “We have to.”
“Says who?” Now he’s over me looking in my eyes. “I don’t see any reason why we need to stop.”
“Benjamin.”
“Right.” He pulls back. Straightens himself and runs his fingers through his hair. “I don’t want to hurt him. I think I might just be pent up. Plus I really want you.”
“Yeah, me too. The pent up thing. I went so long with everyone hating me, it’s hard to reign it all in.” I sigh as I look over at him. “We can’t do that to Benjamin. Honestly I don’t think that we know each other enough to mate. I made that mistake once and I will not do it again.”
“I don’t expect you to. Look, I will keep my distance for a minute. I think we need to figure out if this is physical or if there is something more. I will not hurt Benjamin unless I know where our true feelings lie. I will study on my own tonight. I think I need a cold shower. I keep looking at you and all I want to do is pin you back on this couch. Maybe you should head over and work on that project with Benjamin.” Peter steps away from me and heads towards the bathroom.
I heave a deep sigh. “Goddess, I’m a slut.” Of course this is in my head. I gathered myself up and headed over to Benjamin’s house.
When I knock on the door. Benjamin opens it with no shirt on. I catch my breath. Just looking at him makes me more breathless than the kiss I just had with Peter. Honestly of all the guys that have kissed me today I can honestly say that I enjoyed Benjamin the best. He is so sweet and kind. I could feel his passion through his touch. With Victor and Peter, although I felt the passion from them, I also felt guilt. Now looking at him like this I blush.
He looks down at himself. “Sorry, let me grab a shirt. I wasn’t expecting you til later.”
“Who were you expecting that you would run around without a shirt?” I smile and joke at him as I close the door behind myself.
“Ha, ha, I doubt the captain of the guard would really take an interest in my lack of shirt. I was waiting on the patrol report for the borders. He is usually here by now.” He comes down the stairs pulling on a dark gray shirt. I am sad to see that sight go. “Why are you so early? I doubt Peter was done with you.”
“We needed to take a break. He is in the shower, he got a bit frustrated. But if you aren’t ready for me then I can go for a walk or something.” I am really hoping that he doesn’t send me away.
“No, don’t be silly. Have a seat in the kitchen and I will bring down my work. We can start now. I will just have to take a break when the captain gets here.” He points the way to the kitchen for me.
“Actually while we are waiting for the captain, I think we should talk.”
He gains a worried expression. “What about?”
“Well, how do I put this, I think I need time to process all that is going on right now. I need to understand all of these feelings. I know you are all great in your own way. But I am starting to see myself as a slut, I can’t be running around with all of you like this.”
“You mean Victor too.” He looks away. I can tell that he looks defeated.
“Yes, but don’t let that mean that I feel any less for you. Actually if I am being honest with myself I have the strongest feelings for you. You are the sweetest, kindest man that I have even met. When I am in your arms I really feel loved. I just need to be clear on all of these feelings. I am feeling guilty all the time now. I don’t like that feeling.”
Still looking away from me. “I am glad that you feel loved, because I love you. I don’t know when it happened, but it did. I am constantly jealous of Peter, or any male that is around you. I wanted to rip Victor’s arms off today. I want you all to myself. I am trying to be patient, but at the same time I am scared that I will not come out on top. I mean they are both Alpha’s I am not in their rank.”
“Just because they were born Alpha’s doesn’t make them better. I am an Omega. Do you think less of me because of how I was born.”
He turns to look at me finally. “Absolutely not. I could never think less of you.”
“Then what makes you think I would think less of you because you are a Beta and not an Alpha.”
“I don’t think that. I am just so scared.”
“Well, I’ll tell you what. Rank is not going to be the deciding vote. How I feel is going to be the deciding factor. Hell if I meet a human and fall in love that is what it will be.”
“Please don’t tell me there is a human too.” He looks at me pleading.
“No, of course not. I was just making a point. I just don’t know what I am feeling. I know I feel something. But I really can’t sort them out. I just need a little time.”
He reaches out his hand to take mine. “I will give you all the time you need. I really did mean it when I said that I love you. I want you as my chosen mate.”
“I just need time. I have to think about all of this. Everything seems so mixed up. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”
He rubs his hands through his hair. “I know, I know. Take your time, I will wait for you. I know I sound impatient, I am trying to keep myself in check. I will work on it. Um, distraction is probably best. Let’s work on that project.” Benjamin indicated the table. “I will go get my papers. Discussing battle is always a good distraction.”
“Yeah,” I start to get my papers out of my bag and lay them on the table, while Benjamin runs upstairs.
Just as Benjamin disappears upstairs there is a knock on the door. “Hey, Olivia, can you get that? I’m sure that that’s the captain.”
“Yeah, sure.” I answer the door to be met by an average looking wolf with a scar across his cheek. “You are?” Just in case it isn’t’ the captain.
“I am the captain of the guard here to see Beta Benjamin.”
“You can come in.” I opened the door more for him to enter.
“Thank you, lady Olivia.” He steps into the living room.
“Why did you call me that?”
“As it stands right now you don’t have a title, but you will in the future, however what it is is yet to be determined. So, lady is the best option for the moment.” He shrugs like it is a topic of much debate, but this was the resolution.
“Please just Olivia. No titles. I am just an Omega. I don’t want any special treatment.” I sigh and head back to the kitchen.
“So, Olivia, I hear you are joining us for training camp.” He followed me into the kitchen. I guess I am the new toy in the shop everyone wants to talk about.
“That is the plan. I guess a lot of people are talking about me huh.”
“Well, yes. The Omega that caught the attention of both the Alpha and Beta. The whole pack can’t wait to meet you.” He smiles and extends his hand for me to shake. As I reach and accept it, “I am glad I am the first. I can tell that you are going to be a great warrior. I can’t wait to see the changes that you will bring forth.”
“Hands off Adrian.” Benjamin says as he stands at the top of the stairs.
“It is just a hand shake Benjamin.” I roll my eyes at him.
“Until you are claimed you are vulnerable to male attraction. I am sorry but we are going to be a bit possessive. I think that is why Hector has now reared his ugly head.” Benjamin puts his hand on Adrian’s shoulder a bit too roughly, after descending the stairs. “Sorry, Adrian, but that is not an option. Report please.”
“Yes, Beta Benjamin. I meant no harm. So do you wish to discuss it here or in the other room?”
“Here is fine, I could use Olivia’s opinion.”
“Alright, as it stands there are eight wolves continuously scouting the perimeter in shifts. The Rogues are striking more frequently. I think they are scouting for a weakness. We haven’t let them get very far, I am certain that they are planning an attack of greater size. Their wolves attack but they don’t stay long and the attacks seem planned. No losses at the moment on either side. They are trying to make it seem like random attacks, but it is too systematic to be random. They are plotting, I would stake my life on it.”
“You just may be. Olivia, what do you think?” Benjamin turns to me.
“Well, you should recommend to Peter to increase patrols and pull the wolves without training from the border to safer locations. I believe Adrian is right they are planning an attack. Have the other Alpha’s had the same thing happen?”
“We haven’t talked with them. I will let Peter know that he will need to.” Benjamin turned to Adrian. “Do as she says. Double the wolves on guard and pull back all those who can’t fight. Report any new attacks immediately.”
“Sounds like a plan. I will set it up as soon as I get back.” Adrian pats Benjamin’s shoulder and then leaves.
“I am going to need to speak to Peter and let him know of the changes. I will also see if he can arrange a meeting with the Alphas, we need to know if the other packs are having the same thing with the rogues.” Benjamin smiled and left me alone.
I decided to take a moment to link Victor to get him to agree to the meeting. “Victor,”
“Yes, dear.”
“Don’t say that. I need a favor from you. It is important.”
“And what do I get out of it?” I can feel the suggestion over the link.
“What do you want?” I’m a little scared to ask.
“A simple favor, agree now and I will do whatever you ask.”
I hesitate for a moment. “Fine, take the meeting with Peter, it is for the safety of all the packs. It needs to be done.”
“Alright.”
“What do you want?”
“I will tell you tomorrow.”
“What? Why?” What the hell is he up to?
“Because I want to see your face. Any excuse to do that and I will take it.” His voice sounds sincere.
“Whatever. Just take the meeting.”
“Yes dearest.”
“I said don’t say that.”
“You said don’t say dear, not dearest.”
“Don’t say either.”
“Then See you later babe.”
Then the link is closed. I will have to deal with that tomorrow. How fun. This is turning into a nightmare. You would think having all this attention would be good, but let’s be honest it sucks. I don’t even get enough of a break to sort out any feelings. I think I should take a run alone. I always think best when I run. I just need to think.