“So, you remember my roommate right?”
I nodded, a smile already appearing on my face. I loved to hear the stories about Evan and his roommate – Calvin, they would play endless pranks on each other and I would end up laughing hysterically at their ideas.
Evan grinned. “So he is very possessive about his stuff. He hardly lets anyone touch his products, including soap and toothpaste.”
My eyes widened, a little excited about this prank. “What did you do?”
Evan leaned back casually, smirking to himself. “I covered his soap in nail polish and now it doesn’t lather and he keeps complaining about it. And then using super glue I stuck his toothpaste to the holder so when he went to brush yesterday morning, he spent over 15 minutes just trying to get the toothpaste out.”
I chuckled, shaking my head.
“Oh, and the toothpaste was stuck upside down. And it wasn’t closed.”
My jaw dropped. “You mean the toothpaste dripped when he started to pull it out?”
Evan nodded, a huge fat grin on his face. “Yes! He spent another 15 minutes cleaning the toothpaste holder.”
“You are evil.” I said, imaging the scene and laughing harder.
“Oh I have one more.” Evan turned to me, grabbing some popcorn from the table and eating it.
I rubbed my hands in excitement. “Tell me.”
Evan chewed on the popcorn speedily. “So he has a fear of lizards, he just hates them. Can’t even look at them even if it’s in a movie.”
I shuddered in disgust. “I hate them too. They are creepy.”
“I should do this to you.”
“Don’t you dare.” I warned him, narrowing my eyes at him. “I know you fear spiders. I’ll set them off on you.”
Evan’s eyes widened in fear. “You wouldn’t dare.”
I smirked. “Don’t test me. You fear them not me.”
Evan sighed. “Fine. So I know he hates lizards. I printed out over a hundred papers of various disgusting looking lizards and stuck them all over his ceiling and window. It took him hours to remove them and even then he can’t sleep on the bed because he fears they are watching him from above and will come to eat him.”
I shook my head. “You mean guy.”
“Hey, it was fun for me!”
“That is why you are mean.” I pointed out.
Evan rolled his eyes. “Oh please, you would have enjoyed this if it was spiders and I was the one suffering.”
I shrugged. “Point taken. So does he not retaliate?”
Evan groaned. “Of course he does. All my white t-shirts are now pink dyed. And there is chewing gum stuck on my pillows.”
I laughed out, gasping for breath. “You two are such cuties.”
Evan winched back. “Don’t call me a cutie.”
I waved him away, still laughing hard. “I can imagine you wearing a baby pink t-shirt and walking on the streets with your messy hair flapping in the wind.”
“I’ll kill you.” Evan warned, the imagination not appreciated.
I stuck out my tongue at him childishly. “You can try.”
Evan grabbed my legs with one hand pulling me closer. I yelped at the sudden move. With his one empty hand, he started tickling me making me gasp and laugh harder.
“Don’t-don’t tickle me.” I gasped out, trying to kick him and get out of the hold.
Evan just guffawed like a villain and continued his assault on my waist.
I choked on my breath, shaking my head and trying to form tangible words. But the only thing that I could do was laugh and breathe heavily.
My hands around his pushing them away but in vain. He was stronger than he looked. Evan was now half on top of me, grinning widely at my teary face as he tickled me. I struggled desperately under him, trying to get away.
And then the door opened.
We froze.
Alex froze.
I couldn’t speak as I saw Alex’s stunning face take in the situation. Evan on top of me and me lying under him.
I was the first to recover, pushing Evan away and straightening my top. I sneaked a glance at Alex’s wide eyes and looked back down feeling a little guilty.
“It’s not like that.” I started but Alex was having none of it.
He was storming towards us – particularly Evan – like a raging bull. I saw Evan’s eyes and he instantly let out a terrified yelp, jumping behind the couch.
“Don’t let him kill me Myra!” he shouted, hiding behind me.
I stood up, staring at Alex who wasn’t sparing me a single glance and was busy glowering at Evan. His hands were in fists and I was afraid that one of those would be delivered straight on Evan’s jaw.
“Alex.” I started, standing in between Alex and Evan.
Evan was crouching behind me lightly holding onto my top like a kid who was going to get beaten up by his father and was cowering under the protective hold of his mother.
Alex took a step forward.
Evan took a step backward pulling me behind with him.
“Don’t hide behind her.” Alex warned.
Evan let out a fake laugh. “I am not hiding behind her she is just standing in front of me.”
Alex took another step forward.
“I am going to die.” Evan screamed pulling me back another step.
I sighed straightening my shoulders. “Alex it is fine. It’s just Evan.” I said. “And he was just tickling me.”
“He touched you.” Alex scowled pointing at me. Then he pointed at Evan, narrowing his eyes. “You touched her.”
“I am sorry. It won’t happen again. We’ll lock the door next time.”
“Evan!” I exclaimed in horror, slapping his arm.
Alex was clearly not entertained by the comment. He lunged forward make me yelp in surprise and stumble back. Alex pushed me to the side and I crashed down on my butt, he didn’t even notice me fall since he was busy pulling Evan by the collar.
I could see Evan’s widened nervous eyes as he looked at Alex. He smiled shakily. “Hey! Long time no see.”
Closing my eyes I blew a breath of a frustrated sigh. “Shut up Evan.”
At the same time, Alex said. “I will kill you.”
Evan choked a laugh. “This is torture. I will report you for abuse.”
“Animal abuse?” Alex taunted his hold still on Evan’s t-shirt collar.
Even faked a laugh. “Haha.” He glanced at his collar. “Let me go.” After a pause he added. “Pretty please?”
Alex glared at Evan, narrowing his eyes. “Repeat after me.”
Evan bowed. “I shall do whatever you say, Your Majesty.”
“Are you mocking me?” Alex pulled at the collar, making Evan stagger forward.
“No!” Evan squeaked. “Never.”
“Repeat – I will never touch Myra Collins again.”
Evan blinked at Alex. “You will not?”
Alex gritted his teeth in annoyance and I found myself holding a hand over my mouth to stop from snickering at Evan’s antics. If he continued this, Alex would definitely kill him.
Evan’s eyes widened realizing what Alex meant. “Oh! Oh. Yes, I will never touch Myra Collins again. I will never touch anyone again.”
Alex’s eyes narrowed further. “I will kill you if you touch her again.”
“I will kill you if you touch her again.” Evan, the stupid man repeated.
Alex glowered. “Don’t repeat that!”
Evan winced at the tone. “You didn’t tell me not to.”
Sighing loudly, Alex let go of his collar pushing Evan slightly. Evan stumbled back but managed to stay on his feet.
Alex looked at me as if just realizing I was on the ground. “Why are you down there?”
I shook my head knowing it was no use replying to that. I stood up by myself. “What are you doing here?”
“You said we needed to talk.”
“Oh trouble in paradise.” Evan muttered in a sing-song tone.
I sent a flat smile, “If you want to live, get out.”
Evan raised his hands in defeat, walking out the door. Just as he disappeared he shouted. “Ya going to do the nasty!”
Alex stared at the now-closed door. “How is he 23?”
I shrugged, sometimes I wondered that myself. Despite his age, he behaved like he was 13.
“So anyway.” I started when Alex interrupted.
“Oh we found out about Athena’s hit and run.”
I gasped in surprise. “Really? Wow, that’s great. Who was it?”
“We don’t have a complete identity but it was someone from her hometown – Ottawa.”
I frowned not expecting that. “So it isn’t related to our hacking case or Ray?”
Alex shook his head. “Even I was surprised at that. But it seems like Athena has her own set of problems. I have told her about this and even assigned a temporary guard to be around her but she said she doesn’t want it. She said she’ll take care of it on her own.”
“Maybe I should call and check up on her.” I mentally thought to myself.
“So what did you want to talk about?”
I shook the thoughts about Athena and focused on Alex. “Oh yeah. So where were you?”
“Did you have a bath?”
I flinched, looking at the Panda white top and striped shorts. After sleeping I had taken a bath and eaten the packed McDonald’s; it was then Evan had suddenly shown up at my doorstep claiming to be bored and needing some entertainment and since I was jobless, I was his only option. “Yes I did.”
Alex raised one eyebrow taking in my disheveled look.
“Hey!” I complained. “Are you saying I don’t look good?”
Alex’s eyes widened, just realizing his mistake and the grave he dug for himself. He shook his head violently. “No, no! I didn’t mean that. You look beautiful. Stunning.”
I titled my head, pressing my lips. “Really now? Are you sure? Or maybe I look like I haven’t had a bath.”
Alex scoffed. “No, not at all. I asked that because you smell.”
“Smell?”
“Of lavender.”
I raised an eyebrow. “I use green apple.”
“Lavender and green apple.”
I rolled my eyes. “Just shut up. Where were you these three days?”
Alex sighed as I let go of the topic. “I was busy. I had to attend so many business meetings and review so many contracts. The entire next week is going to be busy too.” He leaned his head back. “The calls keep coming asking if their data is safe with us.”
I winced. “Yeah, your company won’t be hacked again.”
Alex laughed softly. “I know. They are just using this as a tactic to give less business.”
I lightly patted his hand. Alex turned his hand, grabbing mine and intertwining our fingers. “I missed you.”
I stared at our fingers with a small content smile. “I missed you too.” More than you’ll ever know.
Alex rubbed his thumb on the back of my hand. “So what did you want to talk about? Seriously who sends – we need to talk – message?”
I grinned sheepishly. “I figured that was the best way to get your attention.”
Alex looked at me, staring into my eyes. My heart skipped a beat. “When you smile you have my attention. When you breathe you have my attention. You are the only one who has my attention Hacker Girl.”
A blush crept up my neck and face and I looked down, feeling a little flushed by his words. I didn’t even know what to reply to that. Alex being so sweet was a rare sight.
“So what do we need to talk about?”
I cleared my throat, fighting the joyful emotions. “I met Diana.”
“My ex Diana?”
I rolled my eyes. “How many do you know?”
“Just one.” Alex sighed. “How did you meet her?”
“Oh nothing much, that bitch stalked me.”
Alex raised his eyebrows. “Stalked?”
I shrugged a shoulder. “Stalked – followed. Potato – potahto.”
“So what did she say and where did you meet?”
“She cornered me at McDonald’s.” I said. “And then she said she wants to marry you because she loves you.”
Alex choked on air, patting his chest as he coughed. I just sat there looking at him with straight lips.
“Loves me?”
I nodded. “Uh-huh. That crazy bitch is in love with you. Oh and she said I stole her boyfriend which I didn’t. So instead I stole her hat.”
“Hat?”
I pointed with the eyes at the rich floral hat sitting on the table.
Alex chuckled softly. “You are something else.”
“Yeah oh and she also said you can’t love.”
Alex’s eyes furrowed. “Can’t love.”
“Because of your mother.”
I watched his face closely, trying to find the emotions he underwent. His eyebrows rose in understanding and then his face fell as if agreeing with Diana. He swallowed, his Adam’s apple moving. Biting his lower lip, his hold on my hand tightened. “That’s.” he sighed, gulping again. “That’s not true.”
Seeing his expressions I had a feeling he was lying. “Really?”
He didn’t reply for a while and I felt like I was pressuring him for something he wasn’t comfortable talking about. As much as I wanted to know what happened with his mom, I didn’t want to force him to delve into that memory. “It’s fine if you don’t want to talk about it.” I assured, smiling at him in understanding.
Alex smiled back. “No, it’s fine. I want to. This is also why I went to Zivah. She helped me get through this.” He took my hand and placed it on his lap, playing with my fingers. He continued to look at our fingers as he spoke. “My parents had an arranged marriage. Both families were rich and benefitted from the marriage so they got married. I am not sure if they ever loved each other but they didn’t fight a lot either. They were this loving and supporting couple in front of the world, our family, according to the media, was perfect.”
I took slow breaths, afraid that the sound may distract him.
Flashback (Alex’s POV)
It was a dark Friday night. I was sitting in the room, hugging my knees and feeling a little scared. Sofia was next to me, she didn’t quite understand the situation yet but she knew she had to keep quiet.
Sandra, my eldest sister smiled at us. “Do you want some cake?”
We shook our heads. From the other side, we could hear the workers whispering. ‘I think she’s angry because he gambled.’ Another voice said – ‘No, no, I think she cheated.’ Another voice – ‘They are getting divorced.’
Sofia who was only 5 at that time, heard the last one and started crying. “Mommy and daddy are breaking up?”
I pulled her into my chest putting one hand over her ears so that she wouldn’t hear any more comments. “No, Soph.” I whispered, patting her arms with the other hand. “They are not breaking up. You don’t think about it, shh, go to sleep.”
Sandra walked to the workers glaring at them. “Shut up before I fire you.”
They shut up.
I smiled at Sandra but she didn’t smile back, she was pacing the room, straining her ears to hear anything from our parents.
“Just sit down.” I said to her.
She shook her head. “It’s fine.” After a few minutes, she sighed. “I’ll go out, you stay here with Sofia.”
I nodded obediently.
It was late at night when I heard a weeping sound and light footsteps. I slowly opened my eyes, trying to adjust to the darkness. Sofia was deep asleep next to me and there was a blanket wrapped around us.
My eyes followed the sniffling sound and landed on a figure curled up in the corner. I softly got up, making sure to not wake up Sofia, she was a deep sleeper. I walked towards the sound.
“Mom?”
My mother’s head snapped up, surprised at my voice. I blinked at the red eyes and wet cheeks. I patted her cheek dry. “Are you crying?”
She pressed her lips together, heaving a breath, and shook her eyes. “No.”
“I am 12, not stupid.”
My mother sniffed out a throaty laugh. “You are smart Alex.” she grabbed both my hands in hers. “You know I love you right?”
I nodded. “I love you too.”
Her lips trembled. Her hold tightened. “You will grow into such a handsome man.”
I smiled. “Like Captain America?”
Mom swallowed, ruffling the hair on my head. “Yes like him.”
I stared as another tear dropped from my mother’s eye landing on my hand. “Why are you crying?”
She sniffed, a trembling smile on her face. “It’s because I am happy.”
I shook my head. “You look sad.”
My mother sucked a quick breath as her voice broke. “I want you to be happy even if I am not there. I want to grow old and become successful. I want you to take care of Sofia and be a good brother to Sandra and Soph.” Her palm rested on my tiny face. “I want you to never cry.”
I blinked at her innocently. “Are you divorcing papa?”
Her smile fell, she looked down. “Who told you that?”
“A worker.”
Mom breathed out, licking her lips. “I am going.”
“Where?”
She rubbed my small thin arms. “To where I can be happy.”
I felt sad. “Are you unhappy with me? Did I upset you?”
“Oh, sweetie.” My mother put a hand over her chest, struggling to breathe. “No, no. I love you. Remember that always, I love you.”
“So why are you unhappy?”
She sighed, looking at my hands. “Do you know what the best superpower is?”
“To be invisible.”
She smiled. “No, it is to smile even when everything makes you cry. It’s to be happy in the saddest times. It’s to not have insecurities. That is the best superpower.”
“Do you have it?”
She shook her head. “No one has it.”
I frowned. “Why?”
“You’ll understand that when you grow up. It’s very rare.”
I nodded. “I will find it.”
My mom smiled softly. I liked it when she smiled. She looked so pretty. So I smiled back, happy that I made her smile.
She took my face in her hands and kissed me on the forehead. I felt a drop of water on my head. “I love you, Alex. I love all three of you, always remember that. It is why I must leave.”
I felt my eyes become watery but a superpower is to smile even when everything makes you cry. So I smiled.
I heard my mother’s sniffs as she controlled her tears. Again I felt the urge to cry, looking at my own mother in such a depressed state. But I smiled.
She hugged me tight and I could feel her chest moving unsteadily. I hugged her back, knowing it could be the last hug. The comfort and love were evident. Just the fact that I might never feel it again, made me cry. But I smiled.
She wiped her face and patted my head before walking out of the room. I stared at her retreating back, instantly missing the touch. I felt a piece of my tiny heartbreak or maybe it was just a chest ache. A single tear dropped down my left eye. But I smiled.
Nobody outside our near family knew that my mother had disappeared the next day. Nobody knew that she had left us and flew away somewhere far. No one knew that because she loved us, she left.
What they knew was after 3 months, she suddenly died in a car accident, on an apparent business trip.
That was the day, I kneeled down on the side of my bed, holding the photo frame of me sitting happily on my mother’s lap. I stared at the photo remembering – the happy smile she had, how pretty she looked, how good she smelt, and how comforting her touch was.
Tears dropped down my eyes landing on the photo. My shoulders shook as I tried to control them. My throat made that weird noise as I tried to not make a sound for anyone to hear. My hand on the frame tightening as I took shaky breaths. I was broken. She loved me but she left me. So maybe the people who love you leave you.
All I wanted to do was scream and cry.
But –
I smiled.
(End of flashback)