Ridian’s POV
No sooner had Sandy and I got to the room than we got down to business. It seemed she was horny as I was because she started kissing me even before we closed the door. I led her to the couch and had her down. She liked being up but I had too much passion that needed to be unleashed. Lying on my back while she did everything was not going to do it for me that day.
She tasted fine as always. i moved my lips from her mouth and trailed them over her shoulder. She arched her back and moaned. I stared at her beautiful face and then suddenly everything changed for me. I could feel my erection going flaccid. Frowning, I leaned down and moved her bra before taking one of her nipples in my mouth. My erection did not return.
What the hell.
I realized there was no point in trying because nothing was working. I no longer wanted to have sex with sandy. Sighing, I got off her and stood up.
“What’s wrong?” sandy asked.
I went and sat down on another couch. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t want to do it anymore.”
“What? Am I not attractive to you anymore? Shit, that’s embarrassing.”
“I don’t think it’s about that,” I told her. She was already insecure as it was. The fact that she was wasting time sleeping around with someone who didn’t care about her said a lot about her self-esteem. “There’s someone else on my mind.” I confessed.
“Kelly, or is it that Samantha bitch? I thought I heard that you two had resolved to be friends or something of the sort.”
There was no way I could trust Sandy with my personal issues. Even I did not understand why I had failed to be with another man. At the back of my mind, I knew it most likely had something to do with Cilla but I did not want to think about it.
I was supposed to live like she did not exist. Sometimes I felt like rejecting the mate bond, but when I saw all the women around me, I kicked the thought out of my mind. Despite being one of the hottest men around, it was hard for me to find quality women. Note the word quality. Getting women was too easy. The problem was that most of them were like Sandy.
Most of the quality women were taken, because male mates rarely rejected good quality women. The rest were unappealing for long term relationships and only good for sex.
“None of the two,” I told her. “It’s just someone I met after the Danny-Joe fight.”
That was a total lie, but it had to be told.
“Where’s she from?”
I smiled at her. “You’ll know in goof time. Besides, we just talked and haven’t gone far. It may not even lead to anything.”
“It’ll be good for me if it doesn’t,” she said. She stood up and came to sit where I was. “I know you think this is just sex. For Kelly, it might be. She doesn’t care about you. But, I do. Ridian, I didn’t want to say it but I can’t keep it in anymore.”
Please don’t say it, I thought.
“Ridian, I think I’m falling in love with you.”
Hell no. I turned and stared at her. She looked almost innocent when she was looking up at me with her blue doe eyes. I looked into the eyes and analyzed them.
“That’s a lot,” I said, unsure of what to say. I had never thought of falling in love with her at any point in my life. What was I supposed to say in such a situation? I always thought she and her sister were ‘cool girls’. The kind of girls who did not attach emotion to everything. This day was going from bad to worse. I decided to go with the truth.
“I’m not in love with you, Sandy. I’ve always thought you and your sister were all about having fun. I didn’t think I’d have to deal with a situation like this. You’re an amazing woman but I don’t think we can work out.”
She sighed. “I knew you would say something like that. Don’t worry, I’m not going to cry or anything. I expected this but I couldn’t leave without saying what was in my heart. Now, I feel lighter. I’m happy that’s out. I can move on in peace now that I know you’re not interested.”
I wrapped an arm around her body. “I’ve viewed you for so long in a certain way so it’s hard for me to suddenly change the attitude. But, I think if you start living a better lifestyle, you will have more chances of finding a great partner.”
“Now, I wish I had not rejected my mate.”
Two years back at the height of their bad-girlness, Sandy had met her mate. Her sister persuaded her to reject him since they wanted to continue being free and independent. Her sister Kelly’s mate had died a few months before. Wanting to alleviate her sister’s grief, Sandy listened to her sister and they continued to have fun.
When I looked at sandy, I saw someone who had sacrificed something good just for her sister’s sake. It was not fair.
“You can still look for him,” I suggested. “Maybe you can start over again.”
“It’s too late. It’s a mistake I will always regret making but I need to let bygones be bygones. I did it for a good cause.”
“Your love for your sister is more than she deserves. A good sister would not have let you do that for such a flimsy reason. Kelly is too self-conceited.”
“But she’s my sister,” Sandy said. “I’m the only person who supports her.”
“Have you ever wondered why?”
“Everyone misunderstands her.”
“What if everyone understands who she truly is and you’re the one who misunderstands her.”
Sandy sighed. “I don’t want to think of it that way. I might regret a lot of things.”
“I understand.”
“Thank you, Ridian. Hey, maybe this friend thing isn’t that bad. We should try it.”
“Definitely.”
That was one less option for me. Damn.