A few days later, I finally adjusted to the new house with a new life. Even though the nightmares were less as compared to before, I was completely happy. Whenever I would sleep with my husband beside me, I would be at peace and wouldn’t have nightmares anymore.
And Lewis fulfilled the promise of replacing Vampire’s memories with a serious attitude. He did it with me on that balcony in all kinds of positions. He would instantly take off my clothes after dinner every night and attach his mouth to my breasts while sucking them fiercely. Clearly, we could do something like this inside the bedroom, but he would always insist on doing it in the deserted beachside where no one would ever come.
He even had a curtain and a bed, and this curtain was also special since it would only allow people inside to see the things outside, but people standing outside wouldn’t be able to notice what was going on within the balcony. He arranged for this after seeing my discomfort.
And then, every single night for multiple times, he would thrust inside me again and again in various positions. I even stood against the railings once completely naked. Thankfully, there was still a layer of curtain that hampered other people’s vision, but it still felt incredibly shameful whenever I would see the ocean before my eyes. Of course, with it, I could still feel a trace of excitement in my heart that made me want to repeat this night again and again.
In short, things were going so well that I didn’t even get a chance to think about Vampire. So when Lewis said he wanted to replace that man’s memories, he hadn’t lied.
But on the third day, my husband suddenly called for an urgent meeting to discuss the dates of shooting the TV series based on my first book. So when he came back, he was so tired that he didn’t even change the clothes and simply laid down on the bed.
This day, it was a rare peace at night that I had observed in three days, but I didn’t appreciate it a single bit. This silence was eating me alive that suddenly gave me an urge to take a walk outside the house. So I removed my husband’s shoes and pulled up the comforter before kissing his forehead. Then I got out of bed after tucking in my husband comfortably and took my jacket before heading out.
After that, I took a cab and stopped in the city area where I was comfortable. I didn’t know why, I just wanted to take a walk tonight in a familiar environment. So after getting out of the cab, I paid the money and walked on the side of the road aimlessly.
I wasn’t thinking too much, but when I actually entered the area of the city, the familiar feeling of guilt resurfaced in my heart, making me feel choked up.
I was too ruthless with my husband. Then just why did he accept me as if it were the natural thing for him to do? What if he would realize his mistake one day and leave me again?
I couldn’t help but feel my heart sinking deeper into depression as I kept thinking about it. I didn’t even realize where I was going, and by the time I glanced around, I was already in a very familiar place.
Chaoyangmen bridge.
My gaze stuck at the base of the bridge where me and Vampire were standing a few weeks ago, possibly months. I walked closer and stood right in the middle while still glancing at that place. I didn’t even remember what day it was, but that scene seemed to have overlapped with today’s, making me immensely guilty.
Why? Why was I still thinking about Vampire?
My husband loved me so much that he was ready to sell himself to coax me into feeling happy. He was a million times better than Vampire, who had broken my heart ruthlessly.
Then why?
I couldn’t understand. I didn’t even have any longing emotions for him. It was just now that we had broken up, I was finally realizing that I had taken everything for granted.
I shouldn’t have been greedy. I should have stayed under my limit. Maybe we could have become good friends. Maybe the emotion of love would have changed over time, making us close friends.
But I just had to ruin everything!
By this time, I was very clear on my feelings. I was just using Vampire as a replacement for my husband, and nothing else. What I felt for him was a momentary attraction that could have gone away easily. Who wasn’t attracted to men in general? But none of the women would go and have an extramarital affair with them!
And by doing that, I had ruined mine and my husband’s lives.
I blinked and the image of days ago vanished, replacing it with the scene where the entire bridge was empty. I couldn’t help but chuckle as I rubbed my arms. Back then, I had the warmth of someone holding me, but now, this bridge could only give me chills.
After calming down, I felt stupid for coming here. What was I even thinking? I sighed and shook my head. Just as I turned around to go home and sleep beside my husband, I heard a voice that I hadn’t heard in a while.
“Elise?”
I stopped in my tracks as my body froze as if I were in a refrigerator. My heart trembled upon hearing that tone that was mixed with a hint of urgency and confusion. I knew that voice so well because we had spent a lot of time together when I was still working on my first novel.
It was Vampire.
The wind blew toward me, making my skirt flutter as I felt chills all over my body. Despite wearing Lewis’s coat around my upper body, I felt as if I was feeling colder than ever. I didn’t want to turn back and see the face of the person I was trying to forget. But the other person naturally didn’t want to let go of me so easily.
He called out again. “Elise, turn back.”
I shut my eyes and opened them again. My eyes were filled with tears, but I didn’t let them come out. I blinked again and again before I could stabilize my emotions and turned around.
What I saw in front of me was Vampire standing a few feet away from me. There was a trace of redness in his eyes as he continued to stare at me without blinking, and after a long time, he let out a chuckle and rubbed his face. “It’s really you. Why did you come?”
I opened my mouth with difficulty. “I wanted to take a walk. And you?”
My heart was frantically beating inside my chest at this time, urging me to get out of this place, but I couldn’t. My feet seemed to have frozen on this bridge.
I suddenly heard him chuckle, but for some reason, it seemed to be forced. “I wanted to take a walk too, but then I decided to drown in my sorrows.”
Before I could even think about what he meant by that, he surprised me by looking at me with tears in his eyes.
“Elise, I…. I really loved you. I’m not lying. I’m finding it hard to move on, even today. I just can’t stand it, you know? It hurts here.” He pointed at his chest. “If it weren’t for that night, we would still be like before.”
“Wh-What do you mean?” He loved me?! What the heck did he mean by that?! Why did he say those words now out of all the time?!
I came back to my husband and had just started to live a happy married life. Why did Vampire come back only to say that he loved me?