Alex’s POV –
“What are you doing here?” I repeat, opening my door further. She’s dressed in a grey tracksuit, her dark hair piled high into a messy bun. Her eyes are drawn in, dark bags circling underneath them. I watch as she takes a step forward, features twisted and contorted with pain. She wobbles unsteadily on her feet and my hand immediately reaches out, grabbing hold of her waist.
That’s when the scent of alcohol hits me.
“Are you drunk?” I ask her quietly, helping her inside. Caleb stands a few feet away from us, watching silently as she stumbles inside the apartment.
“Get your hands off me Alex!” Ariana slurs and I immediately drop my hold on her, taking a step back.
“What’s going on? Are you hurt?”
She doesn’t answer my question and takes a look around the apartment, sadness filling her eyes.
“It’s true, isn’t it?” She whispers, reaching up to brush a single tear from her eye. I take a step closer, holding my hand out to her but she shakes her head, her beautiful large eyes filled with pain.
“What’s true?” I ask her, shaking my head in confusion.
“You took this apartment! You took my apartment.” She yells at me, her eyes covered in a glossy sheen. I simply stare at her, lost for words.
“I got a call today Alex. . . From my estate agent. He said the property isn’t available to rent anymore because my boyfriend rented it out. I thought he meant Justin but no, he meant you.”
“Hermosa, I thought — ”
She shakes her head, holding up her hand to silence me.
“No! Do not call me that! You don’t get to call me that Alex!” She slurs, almost tripping over her own feet. Caleb takes a step forward towards her, his eyebrows creased together with confusion. Ariana doesn’t seem to mind having Caleb near her and he takes it as his chance to wrap an arm around her waist, holding her up.
“I’ve got you,” he says quietly. Ariana turns towards him, dangerously close to his face and I can feel my shoulders physi-cally tense.
“Thank you Caleb. You have a funny name but I like you.”
There it is again, that jealousy inside my stomach. I glance up at her, clenching my teeth tightly. My arms are twitching to walk over to her and wrap my arms around her shivering body.
“I thought you couldn’t afford the rent.” I explain quietly. She shakes her head, her lips trembling.
“I was saving up for it! I wanted this place to be mine Alex! I wanted one thing to be mine, a fresh start. A new place, new memories, a clean slate. You took that from me!”
I suck in a breath as I realise she’s right. I took away her clean slate, her fresh start away from Justin.
“Please Ariana, I didn’t know.” I apologise, holding eye contact with her. I want her to see how sincere I am, see the truth behind my apology.
Ariana spins away from me, turning her back so I can’t see the pain flash across her face. She shoves Caleb lightly and walks over to one of the beanbags, dropping down onto it. Caleb looks at me silently before motioning towards the door.
“Do you want me to go?” He mumbles and I nod, running a hand through my hair.
“I’ll call you.” I say, slapping his back as he leaves. Before he closes over the door, he turns to look at me, he eyes flicker-ing over to Ariana.
“Tell her how you feel, I’m sick of dealing with your moping arse day after day.”
I nod, watching as he disappears and closes the door over, leaving me alone with Ariana. She’s completely silent as she stares out of the windows.
“Can I talk to you?” I ask, walking over and taking a seat on the second bean bag, a few inches away from hers. She doesn’t respond and when I turn to look at her, silent tears are streaming down her face.
I don’t realise what I’m doing until I’m kneeling down in front of her, cupping her cheek with my hand.
“Don’t cry, I’ll take all my stuff back. I’ll tell him I don’t want the apartment anymore.” I plead with her, my thumbs wiping away the tears on her cheeks. She trembles under my touch, her eyelashes fluttering closed. Beads of tears run along her lashes and I wipe them away, feeling my stomach clench tightly.
Why does it feel like I’ve been punched in the gut?
“I shouldn’t be taking this out on you,” she whispers, her words wobbling with emotion. I remain silent, willing her to con-tinue.
“It isn’t the apartment that’s bothering me. It’s Justin. I mean — I do want this place. I really really wanted this place so I could have a fresh start. Everywhere I look in my bedroom, I’m reminded of Justin. My parents don’t ever stop talking about him, I can smell him everywhere. I can’t afford this apartment Alex, you’re right.”
She blinks and looks at me, her eyes widening slightly as she notices how close I am.
“I’m kidding myself if I carry on thinking I can afford it. Look at it, it’s the definition of beautiful,” she murmurs, slurring her words slightly due to her tipsy state. I keep my eyes fixated on her, unblinking.
“My definition of beautiful is right in front of me.”
I can feel her suck in a breath at my words and I can hear Caleb’s voice ringing through my head.
Tell her how you feel.
How do I feel? What is it that I want from her?
Whenever I’m around her, I get the urge to protect her with my life. I want to wrap my arms around her, bury my face in her hair and breathe in her warm scent. She smells like vanilla and soap mixed with her own unique scent, it’s intoxicating. I want to feel the pressure of her lips against mine as I kiss her but I don’t want it for just one night.
I want it over and over again.
“Alex,” she whispers, leaning forward. It’s my turn to inhale deeply, my hand trembling as I try to keep it pressed against her cheek. I close my eyes as I remember her words —
“You scare me Alex.”
I hastily remove my hand away from her, standing up. She blinks a few times but I quickly turn my back on her, clearing my throat. I remind myself of who I am and what I represent.
“You can take the mattress, I’ll sleep on the floor.” I say to her, handing her a blanket from one of the removal boxes. She takes it from me silently and nods, standing up. Once she disappears into the bedroom, I walk over to the windows, lean-ing against them.
I spend the next hour watching the world go by beneath me.
*****
Ariana’s POV-
I can’t sleep. I toss and turn for the tenth time before sighing deeply. I can feel the effects of the alcohol slowly fade and the room begins to spin, making me feel nauseous. I climb up from the blow up mattress, wrapping the blanket around my shivering body as I head for the kitchen.
My footsteps pad softly against the floor as I walk into the living room, noticing Alex’s sleeping body on the floor. He’s lying on a thin blanket, his top half naked. I breathe deeply, my eyes wondering over every muscle, every part of smooth, tanned skin. The tattoos travelling up and down his arms and over his chest are dimly lit from the lights on the ceiling. I notice his chest rising and falling steadily as he sleeps, his lips parted slightly.
I suddenly feel an overwhelming sensation of loneliness hit me, straight in the heart. My eyes begin to fill with tears and I blink them back, forcing myself to regain control. I can’t break down, not again. I felt so broken on the inside, my heart in pieces from endless years of pain and misery. I thought Justin was the light at the end of my dark tunnel. I thought he was my freedom, my chance to really love.
Now, he’s gone.
I whimper in the dark, wrapping my arms around myself as I stay rooted to the spot. The loneliness fills my entire body until it feels like I’m being suffocated, drowning in a sea of pain. My feet begin to walk forward subconsciously until I end up beside Alex. I lean down, lying next to him. His warm scent wraps around me, numbing the aching pain inside my heart.
“I think you’re beautiful too,” I whisper into the dark, aware of Alex’s body behind me. I shuffle a little closer to him, just until I can feel the warmth from his body. I wrap the blanket around me tighter, feeling my eyes grow heavy by the sec-ond.
Just as I’m about to drift off into a sleep, I feel a strong arm wrap around my stomach, pulling me into a firm body radiat-ing heat. The loneliness inside my body begins to fizzle out until it’s almost completely gone.
I’m fast asleep to realise it’s because of him.