People deal with grief in different ways. They say that the reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same.
It has been a week since Amber’s passing, since the funeral Skye has just grown more distant. I keep reaching out and all she does is push me away. I know she is grieving so I have not forced the subject. We are sitting in Amber’s house busy packing up some of her stuff that Skye decided to donate.
Skye ~”Damon.”
Something is wrong.
Damon ~”Yes baby?”
Skye ~”I have decided to move out.”
I drop the box that I was holding.
Damon ~”Move out? Why?”
Skye ~”I am going to come live here, I don’t want to sell her house or rent it to tenants.”
Damon ~”I don’t understand?”
Skye ~”Things between us are not doing great.”
Damon ~”Baby we are just going through a hard time. You still working through all of this. Don’t make a rash decision, please think about this.”
Skye ~”I have, I don’t think I can do this, not now, not anymore.”
Damon ~”I don’t understand. Are you breaking up with me?”
Skye ~”Damon, I am sorry.”
Damon ~”But baby, we love each other.”
Skye ~”Please, don’t make it any harder than it is.”
Damon ~”Skye, please, don’t do this.”
Skye ~”I will come fetch my things after I have picked Mason up from hospital.”
Damon ~”Why are you picking Mason up from hospital, I thought Brody was going to?”
Skye ~”I told Mason he can come stay here until he can get back onto his feet.”
Damon ~”Are you going to look after Mason now?”
Skye ~”Yes, Amber would have wanted me to.”
Skye has been to see Mason every day since Amber passed away. The guilt has been killing him, we keep telling him it is not his fault but he cannot forgive himself. They have grown very close as friends that is what I have believed until now.
Damon ~”Baby, Brody can look after Mason, I can go past and check up on him every day. Why now must he come live with you?”
Skye ~”Damon he is a friend, he understands what I am going through.”
Damon ~”And I don’t understand what you are going through? I of all people know how it feels, how can you say I don’t understand?”
Skye ~”I did not say that you don’t understand. Mason just needs me now.”
Damon ~”And I don’t need you? How can you just wake up one day and not care for someone anymore?”
Skye ~”I am not saying that I don’t care about you. I just don’t see our relationship going anywhere.”
Damon ~”Well how am I supposed to know where our relationship is going if you are not telling me?”
Skye ~”Damon, we just not working.”
Damon ~”And who is working? Mason?”
Skye ~”No Damon! Nobody, not everything is about you.”
Damon ~”I think I should take you home, sorry to my place, so you can do what you must do.”
The drive back to my place is quiet, we do not say a word to each other. To think this morning she woke up and told me she loved me, did she really mean that? Or was it just something she felt she had to say? And then only a few hours later she does not feel the same. Now I know she is going through a hard emotional time, but how the fuck can she not love me anymore. To say I am gutted is not even the words.
I am watching her as she is packing her clothes into suitcases, the very suitcases that we used when we went to a happier place than this. Only this time this suitcases does not have my clothes in, this time it is taking everything of hers away from me. I don’t what to do or what to say. Do I just let her go? She has made up her mind, there is nothing that can change it now.
Damon ~”Skye please, if you want to get engage then let’s get engage, if you want to marry then let’s do. Whatever it is I am willing to do it.”
Skye ~”Damon, that is not what I want, you just have been so distant.”
Damon ~”Baby it is because you were distant and I did not know what to do. I am not good with things like this.”
Skye ~”Damon, please let me just do this for Mason.”
Damon ~”Baby please promise me that you will think about this?”
Skye ~”Damon I cannot make any promises.”
With that she takes her suitcases downstairs and outside to the car. I hear how she calls for Max struggling to get Bella to stay away.
Damon ~”Bella, come here my girl.”
I hear Bella rushing up the stairs. Five minutes later Skye is closing the door and I hear her car starts and pulls off.
Damon ~”Bella, they left us my baby, Max and his mommy is gone.”
I wrap my arm around Bella and we both fall asleep on the bed.
The next day I am awaken by Maggie fighting with me about Bella.
Maggie ~”Hey, get that little nutter of the bed. Where is the other one?”
Damon ~”They left.”
Maggie ~”What you mean they left?”
Damon ~”They moved into her sister’s place. They left.”
Maggie ~”Is she still your girl?”
Damon ~”No she broke up with me. She wants to look after Mason.”
Maggie ~”Is he big man? Can’t he look after himself?”
Damon ~”Maggie he broke his legs, remember?”
Maggie ~”But he will still walk.”
Damon ~”And his arm.”
Maggie ~”He has another one.”
Damon ~”Well she wants to look after him.”
Maggie ~”I think it is bullshit.”
Damon ~”So do I Maggie, so do I.”
Maggie ~”Well are you going to sit here the whole day again or you going to work?”
Damon ~”I am going to work.”
Maggie ~”Brody just called, he said you are late.”
Damon ~”Shit.”
I rush into the shower and throw some soap onto a sponge, then I notice it is hers, the furious side in me chucks it over into the bath. I do not want her shit in my space. After scrubbing down and washing my hair, I am drying off and getting dressed, ready to go.
I rush down to the coffee shop to meet Brody. I know she won’t be here, or so I hope and if she is, I will just ignore her. She wants to play a game, well so will I? She wants to make this over, well I will show her that we are. This morning when I woke up, I did not decide I don’t love her, no, I know that I do. But what I did decide is that I won’t let her play me, she won’t break my heart. The only person that hurts me is me.
When I arrive Brody is waiting for me.
Brody ~”Hey Bro.”
Damon ~”Hey Brody.”
Brody ~”I ordered you a double espresso.”
Damon ~”Thanks. So I guess no Mason yet?”
Brody ~”He said he might pop in tomorrow. I heard the fucked up think that happened with Skye. I am so sorry Bro.”
Damon ~”I don’t understand why she needs to look after Mason. I mean he can come stay with one of us.”
Brody ~”He said she insisted. He is too scared to talk to you.”
Damon ~”He better be! It is not on, she is my damn girlfriend, not his nurse.”
Brody ~”I won’t say that out too loud. She is in the back.”
Damon ~”She won’t have the balls to say anything.”
Then I see her walking out the back, I can’t even say she is looking upset because she has a damn smile on her face and if shit can’t get worse, she is the one serving our coffee.
Skye ~”Hey Brody.”
Brody ~”Hey Skye.”
Skye ~”Hi Damon.”
Damon ~”…..”
Skye ~”Okay… I guess enjoy your coffee then.”
She walks away and Brody looks at me puzzled.
Brody ~”What was that about?”
Damon ~”You really think I am going to speak to her after she just dumped my ass like that?”
Brody ~”What do you mean dumped? I thought she just moved out?”
Damon ~”No, she fucking dumped my ass like shit.”
Brody ~”Sorry bro, that is fucking sick. No wonder that shit does not want to talk to you. Is he behind this?”
Damon ~”For his damn sake, I hope he is not.”
Brody ~”This is bullshit.”
Damon ~”I just don’t want to think about it.”
Damon ~”I think I am to run, I will see you at seven?”
Brody ~”Don’t be late.”
Damon ~”I am never late.”
I finish up my coffee and rush out of the shop. Well, I think that went just fan-fucking-tastic, it does not seem like she shed a single tear. So yes, I did not even say hello to her, a bit childish? I can’t give a shit, does she really think I am going to smile at her after what she did yesterday.
I am so in thought that I do not hear someone calling my name right until they are next to me.
Leia ~”Damon Chase.”
I swing around at the mention of my name.
Damon ~”Leia.”
Leia ~”What’s got your ass on fire, you were nearly sprinting there?”
Damon ~”Just had some people that I did not feel like seeing.”
Leia ~”It is so nice to see you again.”
Damon ~”You have… grown up.”
Leia ~”If you mean I got tits and an ass then yes.”
Damon ~”You looking hot. I mean, great, I mean, you have grown up.”
Leia ~”I think you have already established that.”
Leia ~”So where are you rushing off to?”
Damon ~”My office, it is just around the corner. And you?”
Leia ~”Oh I have an interview just around the corner.”
Damon ~”What happened to being a doctor?”
Leia ~”That kind of fell through in my first year but I am now looking at being a kindergarten teacher.”
Damon ~”Here in town?”
Leia ~”I am busy looking for some openings but until then I will just be doing some temp work.”
Damon ~”You must give me your number, we must go for coffee some time.”
Leia ~”That sounds great, I would like that.”
We exchange numbers, promising to make an appointment for coffee soon.
I first make a stop at the coffee shop downstairs to get some petites and coffee for me and the girls.
I make my way up the elevator to my office where I am greeted by Tajsa and Joelle.
Tajsa ~”Morning Mr Chase.”
Damon ~”Morning Tajsa.”
Joelle ~”Morning Mr Chase.”
Damon ~”Morning Joelle.”
Tajsa ~”We heard the shitty news from Brody and we thought we would take you for petites downstairs.”
Joelle ~”But I see you have beaten us to it.”
Damon ~”Tell me again what the word secret means because none of my friends know.”
Tajsa ~”Brody just wanted to give the heads up if you started flinging any whiskey bottles at the door.”
Damon ~”I did that once, and I’d never make that mistake in wasting a good bottle of vintage like that again.”
Tajsa ~”So are you going to share those or just stand and make us hungry from the smell?”
We pull the chairs in reception in a circle together. And of course they are waiting for me to spill.
Damon ~”Ok hit me with it.”
Tajsa ~”Why did she break up of you?”
Damon ~”She said she does not love me anymore.”
Joelle ~”But you don’t just stop loving someone after three months.”
Damon ~”Was it three months?”
Tajsa ~”Yes it was almost.”
Damon ~”Well she reckons she cares about me but that things are not working.”
Joelle ~”Since when, everything was fine during that weekend?”
Tajsa ~”Brody’s brother even said he thinks you guys might get married.”
Damon ~”I even told her I would marry her.”
Tajsa ~”What did she say?”
Damon ~”She does not want it.”
Joelle ~”I am sorry Damon, but I don’t think she knows what she wants.”
Tajsa ~”She is just still upset.”
Damon ~”That is what I said. And then she says to me we have grown distant.”
Joelle ~”But she has been pushing you away.”
Tajsa ~”What is this thing with Mason?”
Joelle ~”I mean first she kisses him, then she keeps phoning him and now she wants to look after him.”
Damon ~”She said she owes it to Amber.”
Tajsa ~”Come on, bullshit.”
Joelle ~”Bullshit with a capital B.”
Damon ~”Now Mason is too shit scared to talk to me.”
Joelle ~”Why? Is there something more going on with them?”
Damon ~”I will fucking break his other arm.”
Tajsa ~”I don’t know what to say.”
Joelle ~”I mean she did not even ask for time.”
Damon ~”The last time she asked for time, she was away for two weeks. Is shacking up with Mason her new idea of time?”
Tajsa ~”I don’t know if Mason will do such a thing but then again that other woman sure did a number on him, he is not the same.”
Damon ~”Well I am not going to allow her to play with my heart.”
We finished up our petites and coffee. The chatter soon turns into happier subjects.
Tajsa ~”Oh before I forget, Mason said he is going to be off for at least eight weeks.”
Damon ~”So the asshole has eight weeks with her, how conveniently planned.”
Tajsa ~”I have to hire a temp in his place for the time, we both don’t have the spare time to fill in his workload.”
Damon ~”That is fine just as long as I don’t have to sit through any of the interviews then I will really throw my whiskey against the wall.”
Tajsa ~”I am already on top of it. I will let you know whom I chose.”
Damon ~”Well then I need to go bore my ass through those sale figures.”
I make my way into my office. I kick off my shoes and put on a comfortable shirt and sit down behind my desk.
Flipping through these reports are not killing that nagging feeling in my heart. That heart that is being played. Here I was thinking that I was playing with these women’s hearts, Skye and Tajsa. But no, it is mine that they have been playing with, it is mine that they have taken and used it for whatever they saw fit. It’s my heart that they been gambling with. Do I think I deserve it, no? Is it my fault, maybe for allowing them?
It takes me another two hours to drag my mind aimlessly through the reports. Come seven I am so over it. I grab my phone and lock up behind me as I head down to the bar. Much to my surprise I am not late this time. Brody is not standing at our usual table, maybe he is hooking up with Candice or Chloe. I take my seat at the table and order myself a round.
A few minutes later Brody shows up but with no girl. Guess he will be going to the club later which mean I will probably go, I mean why not? I am after all single again. Not that I am looking for a girl, I could do with the distraction, I mean the club, not a girl.
Brody ~”Hey Bro, sorry I am late. Had a meeting with the old man.”
Damon ~”And what did he have to say?”
Brody ~”Well I explained to the old lady that I have been going on dates trying to find that one they keep talking about.”
Damon ~”And what did she say?”
Brody ~”She said that she has thought about it and she is being unfair.”
Damon ~”So she is going to drop this shit of getting married.”
Brody ~”No, she told me I have a year.”
Damon ~”Then you not taking over now?”
Brody ~”She is giving me half her shares, she will only sign over the rest when I am married.”
Damon ~”Damn that is good news. I think that deserves four tequilas.”
Brody ~”Better make that another four.”
Damon ~”Why?”
Brody ~”Tajsa text, she is on the way with your new CFO.”
Damon ~”I hope he is better looking than Mason.”
Brody ~”Talking about the jerk, have you heard from him?”
Damon ~”Not a word.”
Brody ~”And Skye?”
Damon ~”I send her a few messages, she never replied.”
Brody ~”Everything will work out bro.”
Damon ~”I am just glad that you don’t need to get married right now.”
We are standing with our backs to the door not paying attention to Tajsa entering.
Tajsa ~”Hey you two.”
Brody ~”Hey Tajsa.”
Damon ~”Hey Tajsa.”
Tajsa ~”I want to introduce you guys to the new CFO.”
Damon ~”It’s you. What are you doing here?”