“Everest.” I lied because I didn’t want to burden him with my problems. Besides, my cousin wasn’t far from my mind.
Liam squeezed the steering wheel. “I’m sorry, Ness.”
“About what?”
“About the decision that was voted tonight.” Starlight made his chiseled profile gleam white.
I bit my lip, then released it along with a ragged breath. “I appreciate you saying that.”
After he parked in front of his modern wood-and-glass cabin, which was as dark as the sky outside the windshield, he picked up my cold hand and rubbed the pad of his thumb over my knuckles.
“Don’t think for a second I’ll enjoy ending his life.”
I swallowed. Hard. It did nothing to dislodge the boulder-sized lump inside my throat.
He cupped my cheek and leaned over the center console of his car, ghosting a kiss across my mouth. The contact sent a shiver straight down my spine.
“Liam?”
His lips were tracing the edge of my jaw. “Yeah, babe?”
“Ask him why he did it. Before… ” The rest of my sentence dangled silently between us.
“I will.”
“And promise to make it quick. Don’t torture him, okay?” I inhaled, and his potent scent swirled through me, the familiarity of it soothing.
“I promise.”Before cracking my lids open, I sighed, wondering if he’d keep his promise come morning.
He lifted my hand, flipped it over, then placed a chaste kiss against my palm. Lowering it, he asked, “Have you eaten?”
Food was the furthest thing from my mind right now. “No.”
“Are you hungry?”
“Not really.”
He tapped his finger against my cool skin. “Maybe once you see the contents of my fridge, it’ll inspire you.”
“Maybe.” I doubted it, though. My stomach was one giant knot.
Clutching my crossbody bag to me, I pumped my door handle and hopped out. Once inside the house, he kicked off his boots. I followed suit, lining my sneakers up next to his shoes. As I stood back up, a nervousness-that had nothing to do with my cousin’s fate-overwhelmed me. I’d never stayed at someone’s house before-well, besides Evelyn’s apartment.
When Mom would work late, I’d stay with Evelyn. She’d fill my belly with her delicious cooking, then fit a mug brimming with stovetop-warmed milk into my hands and read to me until I fell asleep with my head on her lap and her fingers in my hair. The month following my mother’s last breath, I’d stayed with Evelyn almost every night. She’d tried to feed me, tried to make me sip milk, tried to distract me with one of her books. All I’d managed was to sleep, and even that had come in fitful bursts.
Liam propped my chin on his fingers and crooked my face up toward his. “You just checked out on me again.”
“Sorry.” I slid my chin off his fingers and swept my gaze over the clean, sharp décor that seemed simple but had probably cost him a small fortune.
He sighed as he wrapped his hand around mine and pulled me toward a large door. Behind it stood a bachelor’s kitchen: beige-veined chocolate marble with copper fixings and smoky-mirrored cupboards that rose with the press of a finger. I’d come to his house before, but hadn’t ventured into the kitchen then.
Liam seized plastic containers from the fridge and set them on the marble island, popping the lids off.
“Did you cook all of this?” I asked as I climbed onto one of the leather stools, admiring how clean and shiny the kitchen was.
“Since Dad died, Matt’s mom’s been sending food over religiously.”
“That’s really sweet of her.”
“She’s a good woman. I heard she came to help out at the inn.” He took out two plates and silverware.
“She did. Isobel too.”
“The pack takes care of their own.”
A warm, fluttery feeling swept through me. I would never tire of hearing I was part of the pack.
He tipped his chin toward the offerings.
Realizing we still knew very little about each other, I asked, “What’s your favorite food?”
“Steak.” He spooned something that looked like polenta onto his plate before adding a bunch of green beans and a thick piece of browned meat. “Original, huh?” He shot me a brazen smile as he slid his plate into the microwave and pressed a couple buttons that filled the quiet kitchen with a soft whirring noise. “What about you?”
“I pretty much love everything. But I have a soft spot for Mexican cuisine. Evelyn”-I dragged my hand through my hair-“she made a lot of our meals back in LA.”
After I prepped myself a plate, Liam set it in the microwave.
“Want anything to drink?”
“Water would be great.”
He pulled open his fridge and took out a bottle of water and a beer.
“This feels like a first date,” I said.
He uncapped his beer, then took a deep drink and swallowed before leaning over to kiss me. “I don’t want this to be our first date. I want to take you out. Tomorrow night, you and me.”
My heart rate accelerated, but then it dipped when I remembered that tomorrow night I would be deleting my cousin’s contact from my phone forever. A sharp spike in my breathing had Liam tipping his head to the side.
“You don’t want to be seen out with me?” he asked.
“What?” I tried to iron out my erratic pulse. “No, it’s not that.” I ran my index finger along the sweaty sides of my bottle. “I do want to go out with you, but not tomorrow.”
His eyes shrouded with contrition. I wasn’t sure-and didn’t ask for fear of the answer-if the remorse was for my cousin or for postponing our dinner.
The microwave beeped then. He handed me my plate before propping himself on the stool beside mine. We didn’t speak again after that, both of us tucking into our food, lost in our respective musings.
I didn’t taste anything. It was just fuel for my depleted body and a means to avoid deliberating about Everest.