My pulse sprang like a livewire inside my veins and knocked against the side of my neck. I almost apologized, but he was a Kolane. He might not be all bad, but he was still the flesh and blood of the man who’d laughed at an eleven-year-old girl in need of guidance and who’d raped a bereft widow after she’d begged him for help.
After an uncomfortably quiet ride home, I left Liam without saying goodbye, my throat and chest too congested with anger and grief.
I headed straight to my bedroom, to the small terrace with the single Adirondack. I dropped into it and watched the heavy starlight bathing the serrated crowns of the pines.
Maybe I wasn’t being fair to Liam. After all, his father had been murdered. Not that Heath’s death was my fault. I’d simply gone to his place posing as an escort so that he’d let me in. If I’d gone as Ness Clark, he would’ve turned me away at the door. After playing nice for an agonizing stretch of time, Candy told him she knew what he’d done to Ness Clark’s mother, to Becca Howard, and to a handful of other women, and warned him she was going to press charges. Heath laughed at her.
At me
And so I’d slapped him. Hard. Which turned his dark eyes frosty. But at least he hadn’t shifted, thanks to the crushed pills I’d slipped into his Manhattan. I drugged him, afraid he’d kill me once I revealed my true identity.
In skin, he was frightening, but in fur, he was a monster.
When I told him who I was, he growled, “Get…out,” and I got out.
And someone must’ve gotten in right after me.
Murdered.
The eight-letter word iced me. I wrapped my arms tighter around myself and stood to go inside when a howl echoed deep in the night.
A shadowy shape moved at the edge of the forest-a large black wolf with glowing eyes. The wolf looked at me across the grassy expanse and howled again, and his howl scattered goose bumps over my forearms, over my entire body. Another deep keening made my muscles spasm and my nails turn into claws.
“Shit. Shit. Shit,” I whispered, backing into my room.
I yanked off my jacket, threw off my dress as my torso twitched, and tore my necklace off. Heat engulfed my skin, and then fur-white, silky fur blanketed my burning arms and sprouted over my legs. My thighs hardened and shortened. My teeth sharpened. I felt them with the tip of my tongue that had grown thicker, longer.
I tried to pull off my underwear, but my hands were paws.
Paws with sharp claws.
A bolt of pain hit my spine. I arched and threw my head back as my lips stretched and stretched, like my nose, like my ears. I growled, and it vibrated against my narrow, rubbery muzzle. My bones shifted underneath my skin, my shoulder blades turning in.
I dropped to my knees hard. The black pads that had replaced my palms absorbed the brunt of my weight. A tail surged from my backbone, shredding my underwear, whipping against my desk and bed. My knee joints cracked, snapping inward, until they became lupine hocks.
Adrenaline shot down my spine and into my limbs, electrifying every inch of skin, sharpening each one of my senses. I heard conversations from all the way inside the living room. I caught the hoot of an owl, the caw of a raven, the rustle of pine needles. I smelled Lysol and detergent and the green scent of the swaying forest beyond my first-floor balcony. I felt the heartbeat of tiny things-bugs and rabbits and owls.
I ran toward my open balcony doors, crouched low, and then sprang over the balustrade. I soared through the frizzling night air, body thrumming from the release of the wolf that had lain dormant beneath my human skin.
I hit the soft grass on all fours, and then I was galloping through the clearing that led to the forest, kicking up clumps of earth and grass. Behind me, on the large terrace, loud gasps and small cries rang out, followed by captivated chatter. I swiveled my head, and sure enough, a handful of bodies were pressed tight against the wooden railing, pointer fingers raised toward my receding form.
Wolf-watching was an attraction mentioned in the inn’s brochure. Visitors were rarely disappointed.
I lifted my nose to the wind and sniffed to pick up on the other wolf’s trail, but became distracted by the chitter of a squirrel spiraling up the trunk of a tall cedar. The furball stopped to watch me, its lithe flesh pulsing deliciously beneath the dusting of tawny fur. I’d hunted a squirrel once, had torn through its warm body and crushed its bones in my jaw. I was a sentient beast, but a beast nonetheless.
I observed the squirrel a while longer, until a new fragrance tickled my senses-sultry and spicy and fresh, like hot musk and crushed mint. I ran toward the scent, my paws kicking up pinecones, my claws digging into moss and clattering against downed logs, splashing into engorged, moon-lacquered streams. I dove into one, rolled on the bank, and then wrung myself out.
Free.
That’s what I was…wild and untethered.
I sprinted. Away from the inn. Away from the girl I’d left behind. The girl weighed down by guilt and debt. I ran until my heart threatened to derail, and still I ran. Only when I passed under a rocky ridge did I slow. The seductive fragrance of mint and musk churned in the air above me. I craned my neck and met the gaze of an impressive black wolf pawing the stone ledge dozens of feet up from where I stood.
Beneath a cover of matted leaves, a mouse shuffled. I didn’t chase it-mice were more cartilage than meat. The wolf made a soft keening noise that traveled toward me slowly. There were no words in that sound…or perhaps my lupine brain hadn’t yet reawakened to our tongue.
Was it Liam?
If it was, had he tracked me, or was it a coincidence that he was there?
I thought of Heath again before remembering that wolves could read minds, so I sprinted away, the forest smudging into one long strip of wild darkness. Only hours later did the inaccuracy of my memory hit me-wolves weren’t mind readers. They could, however, speak into minds, but only the Alpha possessed that ability, and I had no Alpha
My secrets were safe.
On Friday night, my stomach swarmed with butterflies. In less than a day, the first trial would begin…and end. Even though I’d managed to transform, did I stand a chance against wolves that hadn’t been on a shifting sabbatical? I stared around my bedroom, wondering if I should pull the blue Ikea bags back out of my closet. My mother would be ashamed of my defeatist attitude. She was a staunch believer in mind over matter.
For all the good that did her.
I crushed her wedding band in my fist as I left my bedroom. On my way to meet Everest, I stopped by the kitchen. Ever since the night Evelyn had curled into bed next to me, and I’d confessed everything to her, we hadn’t spoken about the pack. We’d discussed safe subjects like food and college-she wanted me to apply, but I hadn’t done my SATs. Tonight again, she was on my case about colleges.
“I have some savings-” she began.
“No.” I shook my head, and my hair brushed my bare shoulders. “I’m not taking your money anymore. Not unless you let me reimburse you.”
“Ness…”
“Have you been to see the doctor?” I gestured to her knees. Lucy had given me the name of her physician, which I’d passed along to Evelyn.
“My arthritis is better.” She ladled gazpacho into wooden bowls, then topped them with golden croutons, tiny squares of raw vegetables, and a drizzle of olive oil.
“Really?”
“Really.” After finishing off the soups and ringing the buzzer to get one of the servers’ attention, she busied herself with making my favorite dish: chicken quesadillas. “You’re getting too skinny.”
I hadlost weight, but I’d gained back some of the muscle I’d lost working two, sometimes three, jobs back in LA. I gobbled up every last golden triangle filled with melted cheese set before me.
Evelyn checked the order sheet the server had dropped off, opened the fridge, and removed thick slices of creamy salmon which she laid on the already smoking griddle.
“Who is singing again tonight?” she asked.
“The Lemons.”
“Are they good?”
“They-” The door swung open, cutting off my answer.
Everest had arrived, but not alone.
“Frank wanted to meet our new cook,” Everest said.