Jules went out of the house and walked in the direction she caught him going until she found a beautiful garden at the extreme left of the house. She walked further into the garden and found Ceaser seated on a concrete bench staring far into what seemed to be a lake.
Jules let out a sigh and walked towards him and sat next to him. She said nothing, just looked at the breath-taking view in front of her.
Every inch of the house was beautiful.
“I used to come here a lot when I was a kid. It was my happy place.” Ceaser said “Now I come here when I need to run away from the reality of life.” Jules looked at him. He looked lost.
“Reality of life?” Jules asked.
“My work. My problems. My fears.” he sighed “Everything.”
“What are you running away from now?”
Ceaser turned to look at Jules and he held his breath.
“My emotions.” He said with his eyes on her face.
Silence enveloped them in a bubble of their own.
Deafening silence.
“I’m sorry.” was all Jules could get out of her mouth.
“For what?” He asked.
“Your wife.” She said looking back at the lake. Now it was her turn to run.
She felt this emotion running through her veins and she couldn’t place it.
Was it Jealousy?
Was it sympathy?
Was it pain?
And more importantly, who was it directed at?
“There’s nothing for you to be sorry about.” Ceaser said to her. “You didn’t know her. Life happened. She’s gone. End of story.”
He didn’t want to talk about Bea. Yes, she was his Wife, yes, she was gone and he cared about her but what she did to him, to their marriage was selfish of her and he hated her for that. Because of all she did, he wasn’t with his daughter.
“How can you say that?” Jules looked at him “She was your wife.” Ceaser turned away.
“Like my father said, I didn’t love her.” He said harshly.
“But you cared.” Jules said softly. “You cared enough to search for her when she went missing.” Jules paused. “Your father was right.”
Ceaser looked at her then, curious as to what his father was right about.
“You are stubborn. Stubborn to admit that you’re still grieving her death.” Jules said “Why is it so hard to admit your feelings and just get through it? Why?”
She wanted to know so badly.
“They’re either hard. Irrelevant. Silly. Disturbing…” he looked into my eyes “… Difficult. Strange.”
Silence.
Jules couldn’t seem to pull away from his imprisoning gaze. Her lips went dry.
“What about your feelings towards me?” Jules asked before she could stop herself.
First, she had no idea where her sudden bravery came from. Second, what the heck was she doing asking him that and jumping into the lion’s cage?
Back to earth Jules!
Ceaser smiled at Jules.
Question of the year.
He thought. He still hadn’t figured it out.
He freaking smiled. Smiled!
Jules took a deep breath in.
Ceaser looked away as he tried to answer her question as honestly as he could.
“What I feel for you is…Strange. And disturbing and is really annoying sometimes. But never irrelevant.”
Jules couldn’t do anything other than turn to stare at him just as the same time Ceaser turned to look at her.
“What do you mean?”
Ceaser reached out and touched the side of her face, his thumb brushing softly against her cheek. Jules eyes closed having lost control.
“I don’t know what I feel for you. I can’t put a name on it… yet. But when I see you…” He let out a breath and Jules open her eyes “… I get this strange feeling. It’s hard to describe and is unlike anything I’ve felt before.”
Jules had no idea when a smile crawled its way to her lips but she felt her heart light up.
“Unique.” Ceaser said “That’s the word. The feeling is unique. But I’m going to make sure I know what exactly it is about it.”
“You should try that with your other emotions.” Jules said pulling away from his hand and looking far into the lake.
“What about you?” He asked.
“Me?” Jules asked, confused as to what he meant.
“Yea. Why do you run away from your emotions?”
“I do not run away from my emotions. I’m not you.” She smiled at him.
“Then why do you avoid this?”
Finally, the question he’d been wanting to ask.
Ceaser thought as he waited for her answer.
“This?” Jules swallowed, her smile fading.
She knew exactly what he was talking about.
“Yea. This thing between you and me?”
Jules looked at him.
“It’s the only way.”
Ceaser’s brows creased.
“For what?”
“To avoid everything that comes with it.” Jules looked away.