I look away and nod as emotion chokes me at seeing him like he was that day. The same and no different, stuck in a time when he was still with me. “She is strong enough to survive the curse, Kye; I made sure of it. It’s why I gave her the shadows,” he tells me, motioning toward Kaif, who has just killed his mate, and I look at him.
“How does this help you being dead? How does any of this help?” I ask.
“Because they become filled with rage, Luna’s rage, they can’t explain it and only act on it. Marabella CAN live with the shadows, Kye,” he repeats, and I look at Kaif’s dead mate lying on the floor.
“Because she always has. She knows why he killed them. She has watched it repeatedly all her life. Lived their lives on repeat through her dreams; she’s strong enough to endure them, and that’s exactly why the shadows tried to kill her. Marabella’s not like them. I made sure of it.” My first thought is all the nightmares she suffers from; here I thought it was because of her depression when she was really living with the ghosts of Kaif’s past.
“She will forgive you, son,” my father murmurs.
“She killed herself because of me,” I tell him.
“No, she killed herself because she couldn’t bear to be alone. Marabella has you, she has Jonah, the only one that needs to forgive themselves is you. Marabella never blamed you, Kyan; she blames herself.” My brows furrow.
“Forgive yourself, Kyan. Forgive yourself for breaking her, because you never did. The shadows I gave her broke her. So that is on me, not you. I am the reason for her depression all these years; I broke her, so you didn’t have to,” he whispers. “I broke her to fix you,” he adds, making me look at him.
His words make me stumble back as I scoff, how does him abandoning me, fix me, how does breaking her help me, her, any of us? “Fix me. You fucking destroyed me!”
“What I did destroyed you. If I didn’t, you would have destroyed yourself when you killed Marabella and me. I gave you a chance to break the curse, to set us all free. Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made, son. It doesn’t mean they are permanent, but they are needed,” he says. I shake my head. How could he say that when I was a child? His words replay in my head; it doesn’t mean they are permanent?
“I’m not gone; break the curse and set me free.” His voice is but a mere murmur before the dream fizzles as Marabella starts to wake.
“No, Dad,” I gasp as he begins to fade out. “No, wait. You can’t leave me!” I stutter.
“I’m still here,” his voice is barely audible as the dream breaks, and I try to cling within the remnants, only to be ripped out as she wakes up.
“Kyan?” Marabella whispers before I feel her fingers run through my hair. I squeeze my eyes shut tighter before sucking in a breath. Opening them, Marabella stares at me worriedly. “Kye?” she whispers, cupping my cheek with her hand. The tingles that I used to get from her touch are now gone, just like our mate bond.
“I have to leave, Ella. Sorry, but I cannot be with you right now,” I tell her, pushing up off the bed.
I grab my clothes, pull them on, and leave. I hear her call out behind me, hear Jonah too. But I can’t; I can’t trust myself to stay in control when so many things are out of my control.
Marabella
Kora is the one who wakes me the following morning. Vague memories of Kyan abruptly leaving and freaking out last night come to mind. The heartbroken look he gave me before he walked out plays on my mind still. My mind is still foggy with sleep as I try to replay last night’s events, to figure out where everything went wrong.
I stare up at the ceiling, and I can hear Jonah on the phone. I turn to my side and try to hear what is going on. Kyan’s voice is muffled coming from the other end. Jonah hangs up with a sigh, before laying back down and rolling toward me. He tugs me closer, burying his face in my neck.
“Morning,” Jonah mumbles against my shoulder. Goosebumps break out over my skin as the sensation sends pleasurable tingles down my spine.
“That was Kyan?” I ask softly, stroking my hand down his arm that is draped over my waist. Jonah stills for a second, rests his head against my shoulder and nods, followed by a hum.
“He dream-walked into your dreams last night,” Jonah explains, and I roll over to face him. His eyes roam my face with tenderness, and I place one hand on his chest, the other traces his jaw.
“That’s why he left?” I ask, and he nods, tugging me closer. His hard body presses closer to mine, and I can feel his warmth bleeding into me. Tingles and sparks ignite and dance across my skin where his skin touches.
“Yes, he spoke to his father, and it upset him. But he is okay; he said he will come over later,” Jonah explains, which baffles me. I frown. I don’t understand? I have no idea what to think about what he had just said. Kyan spoke to his father through my dream? How is that even possible?
It puzzles me, until my train of thought is interrupted when Kora purrs loudly, yanking me from my troubled thoughts as the noise emanates embarrassingly loud out of me. Jonah chuckles, burying his face into my neck, enticing her to purr louder.
I roll my eyes at her. Kora is not holding back, and I try to think around the embarrassing noises she is making. Oh god, I have no control of her, so I just give in. With a sigh, I press closer to him, enjoying the tingling sensation that runs up my spine, the warmth of his skin against mine, and his scent as it envelopes me. I want him, and I have to pull myself back from leaning into him even more. So, I quickly dismiss the need to grind against him like Kora wants.