“Dad said Dominic was a better man than he gave him credit for, that his father died for someone.” Mom nods her head. Kora and I have wrestled with it all afternoon until I went back through my text messages, finding the first one Kyan ever sent me and it suddenly made sense.
“It was me, wasn’t it? Dominic died to save me,” I breathe. I want to bring my hand to my chest and rub it as my heart squeezes.
“It’s not your fault, Marabella, you didn’t kill him. He chose to save you; he knew you were Kyan’s mate. Dominic knew from the first time he met you that you would both be mates,” she sighs.
“Is that why her mate hates her?” Eziah asks, and I look at the carpet beneath me.
I know some part of him would hate me for being the reason why his father is dead. No wonder he really does hate me. I can’t blame him… It is because of me he lost his father.
“Kyan doesn’t hate her; you can’t hate your bonded,” Mom reprimands Eziah.
I snort. That is obviously a lie because Kyan sure as hell hates me. “He hates me, mom. He told me himself,” I tell her firmly.
She can’t be that stuck in her delusions and ideas. Just because she believes one can’t hate their bonded one doesn’t mean it’s impossible. If she saw the hatred Kyan has for me, she’ll know.
“Maybe he doesn’t hate you but hates what you mean to him, what you could be to him, Marabella,” she tries to reason with me, giving my shoulder a gentle squeeze.
I just wish she made more sense. “Then why Jonah then? Why did you push me to someone even after you failed to create the bond between us? Didn’t you realize this would just make it worse for me? For us?” I whisper, trying to hide the pain and anguish in my voice.
But Mom isn’t moved. “Jonah should have been yours,” she replies determinedly.
“But he’s not,” I sigh, once again reminding myself of what I already know. My mother stops brushing my hair, and I look up at her when I notice Eziah is watching her.
“What?” I ask once I notice that her expression turns clouded.
“Fates, forgive me; I have to give her something,” she whispers, almost too low for me to hear.
Eziah’s brows furrow, and he picks at the carpet, looking down at the floor with an intense look on his face.
“Jonah has no mate, Marabella. We never bonded him. We left him to choose his own mate, hoping you would choose him over Kyan and that he would choose you,” my mother whispers, making my heart thunder loudly.
“So you left him to be on his own? How could you do that to him?” I ask horrified. I pull away from her. Doesn’t she realize that what she just said has been my worst fear? I fear it more than my mate hating me. Fear having no one to call mine.
“Because he deserves the one he was chosen for. Jonah deserves you, he is your opposite, and his soul matches yours perfectly. He took away the darkness,” Mom really is adamant about Jonah, even now… I shake my head.
“What about Kyan’s? We must be the same for the fates to decide.” I press the issue.
“Darkness attracts darkness, craves it, Marabella. Jonah is better for you,” Mom responds without any emotion in her voice. I feel like she is trying to convince me to agree.
“So you are saying if I don’t choose Jonah, I will turn dark?” I raise an eyebrow and glance at my brother. I couldn’t let that happen. I can’t hurt my family like that.
“No, I am saying your future will be dark.” Mom shakes her head.
I can’t. Her words confuse me as much as her actions do, and I can’t get any real answer from her. That alone annoys and frustrates me more than ever. “Then why were we bonded?!” I raise my voice. She says nothing, so I feel like I need to explain something she keeps overlooking. “Kaif won’t allow it, Mom, Kyan would never allow it.”
“That’s the beauty of choice. Just because Kyan and Kaif forbid it doesn’t mean you have to accept it!” Mom whispers.
“They’re best friends; they have a-” I pause. Is this something I am allowed to share? I have a feeling it isn’t. That Jonah and Kyan don’t want anyone to know about the bond they share. Kyan already hates me. One secret of his is out, and I’m not about to tell another to the world.
“They have a what, Marabella?” she questions as Eziah watches on silently, yet observes everything.
Choosing the lesser of evils, I sigh and shake my head. “They are best friends; I don’t want to come between them. Who would Kyan have left if I took his friend away?”
“Sometimes the best choices to make are not to make any Marabella. Don’t choose between them, keep them both. Who knows, maybe their bond will save them, save you,” Mom says, shocking me.
My head whips to the side to look at her. “You know they have a bond?”
“I am the Moon Goddess. I noticed Jonah’s aura changed. It has flickers of Kyan’s through it; I thought it might have meant they were like your fathers, but I realized it must have been something to do with Witchcraft because it seemed at certain intervals. Jonah was taking more before returning it to Kyan like he filtered the darkness in a way.” She flashes me a gentle, almost understanding smile.
“Makes sense; Jonah is a guardian. Guardians are made to protect,” Kora says.
“How do you know?” I ask her.
“I don’t, it’s just a feeling I got. It suddenly came to me when mom talked about the bonds,” she mutters as if she’s still trying to comprehend her own words.