His grip becomes too tight, and his claws slip into my collarbone. The next moment, I hear it crack under the pressure. Kaif groans and drops me, clutching his own shoulder. My pain, once again, becomes his. He keeps inflicting pain on himself, stupid idiot.
I hear Marabella stifle a sob. Shit, doesn’t he understand all he does is scare her? How does he expect her to come to him, to chase him around, if all he does is terrify her?
“I will come to you on Rose’s birthday. But you need to shift back, or I won’t visit. Leave him alone, you’re…. you…” Mara trails off.
I get it. She has no idea what to call him, what the fuck he is. I really have to bite my tongue, not to help her out and offer her to call Kaif flea factory, bigfoot, or furry bastard. Sure would make me chuckle if she used any of those words.
“Lycan,” Lucas offers gently. Even though his voice is soft, I assume not to scare Mara even more, his face is still a little pale.
“I thought they didn’t exist,” Marabella mutters, looking away. I bet she and her father are exchanging those what the fuck glances again. I’ve always felt like Ezra can read her without asking any questions, so it’s no surprise to see her seek support from him.
“Well, how the heck else do you explain that?” I hear Ezra’s voice.
“Did you know?” she asks her father. Mara has so much on her plate that I don’t feel surprised about how easily distracted she is.
Can’t say the same thing about stupid, who is hovering over me. He’s lucky I love his human counterpart or I would have fled the moment I learned what he was. Unfortunately, Kaif, I have also grown attached to like he is some vicious pet I know should be put down, yet I know it’s not his fault so I keep trying to save him, despite him trying to constantly kill me.
Kaif growls low in the back of his throat when Ezra scoffs. “No, how could I know? I don’t even think your mother knows this one.”
“Who with you, who is that you kiss him too?!” Kaif snarls, and Marabella’s face turns back to the screen.
Her eyes are wider than ever before. She looks completely appalled. “What, no! He is my father!” she yelps, staring at him.
“You not kiss him then?” Kaif repeats and slightly tilts his head as if he is making sure Mara isn’t telling him lies.
“No, definitely not. Well, maybe on the cheek, but not like Jonah,” Marabella says, and Kaif nods.
“You do not kiss Jonah anymore. Only like the father,” Kaif glares down at me.
This uncivilized swine is impossible. Right now, I need Kyan back. Just beneath my skin, Jax is ready and alert, since Kaif isn’t willing to shift back and give Kyan ultimate control.
I’m not sure how much more of his beatings I can take. It’s already a massive relief on my mind and bloody body that Marabella calmed him down.
However, Kaif almost seems normal right now. Calm, even. Aside from the fact that there is a hairy monster standing over me, I’m surprised. Somehow, we managed to speak with him, which is the most I have heard him speak.
Not that he can’t, but in this form, usually Kaif just growls and grunts. To see him actually converse makes him somewhat less daunting.
This animalistic side is unreasonable and unmanageable. His injuries are the only way to force him to let go of control. Though Marabella has pulled him back, he seems almost human, despite being in this form. It is impressive. Truly unimaginable, but here I am, watching him call me a peasant and toss backhanded shit in my direction while he speaks to Mara.
“No, no kissing, I promise. But can you give Kyan control?” she asks in a gentle tone.
There she is, the girl I fell in love with – the woman, who wears her heart on her sleeve, even though others ignore it. The same woman, who does everything for everyone, and pushes herself to the last place in her story.
“You like Kyan?” Kaif asks, and Marabella bites her lip. Her eyes snap to the side for a mere second, but I still notice it. She gulps and nods, clearly lying.
“Me not like him either. He has shit for brains and washes his hands too much,” Kaif huffs.
“I give you Kyan, you come here on the flower’s birthday.” He seems a little confused as he thinks about it. I could even assume he’s actually deep in thought.
“No, her name is Rose! You simple-minded brute! She is my sister.” I can’t help but add the part to set his mind back on the right track.
“The dwarf with the rainbows in her hair?” Kaif says with a huff. He looks down at me and frowns.
“Yes, Rose, you have met her heaps of times,” I remind him. Deep down, I have a nearly irresistible urge to roll my eyes, but I know better than that. To anger him all over again, now that Mara calmed him, would be a suicide.
“No, Kyan meets her. I only meet you and him,” Kaif says as he points a sharp, curved claw at Lucas. My eyes dart at the old man right as he pulls away. I’m surprised he hasn’t shit himself already.
“Kaif, change back,” Marabella’s voice stops our back-and-forth banter.
“Then you come here, you stay with me here,” he asks her. No, let me rephrase that – he demands. I get it, Mara is his mate, but that doesn’t give him the right to act like a fucking neanderthal.
“Mm-hmm,” Marabella hums, nodding her head to him.
Kaif seems unsure as his hands flinch. I feel Kyan shackled within him. Right now, Kaif still stands over me as the monster and the warlock merge into one, creating a bigger, threatening beast.
There is only one Kaif, always has been and always will be. Kaif, in his full glory, proper form – the monster from the past. One Kyan only understands as instinctual, barbaric, and purely Kaif.
Usually, the slivers of Kyan I get are just fragments, while Kaif is almost calm. I realize Kyan is constantly in battle with Kaif’s urges.
It makes me wonder if Kyan realizes how much he is fighting, or does he think they are one and the same because I can feel two sides to Kaif. Kaif, being the most dominant holder. Still, Kyan, I can feel him beneath the surface. I just never realized it before. Maybe Marabella can help them both… If Kyan would ever let her.
“Ok, but you come to me soon,” Kaif barks, and Marabella nods her head wordlessly.