Cronus

War. I am at war with myself. While he, my mate tears open my heart day by day with his indulgence with Theia, I cannot seem to find hate for him within me rather just a seed of hope blooming like a flower every day. When her fingertips slide across his chest he’s shooting an arrow straight through my ribs. When her lips meet the shell of his ear to whisper sweet nothings he’s ripping my skin off my bones and when he smiles at her with that gentle look in his eyes, he has finally left me to die on the cold ground as nothing but a heap of bones.
Deimos, my male. Tell me what must I do? Tell me how should I behave? Tell me how to move past the pain you inflict on me. Tell me how can I… survive. I wish to ask him these questions. But how can I when all his eyes do is watch her every moment? How can I when his lips curve into a smile when hers do as well? How can I when his fingers shake just so they can feel the warmth of her flesh? How can I… when his heart finds her worthy to rule by his side.
After our last argument, we have kept away from each other. He has done so as his interests remain elsewhere and I have as a shield to protect my heart from further damage. I barely leave my room unless it’s for my females or I need a new book to distract myself. But that doesn’t mean I cannot see him. Every time I close my eyes all I see is him. All I smell is him and all I feel… is him.
Opening the doors to the balcony walking up to the railings looking up at the sky. I close my eyes taking in a deep breath, the day breeze softly pushing my hair backwards my loose white dress flowing with its direction. The sun’s rays warming my cold flesh and drying my wet cheeks. Is this how I will live from now on? Alone with no one by my side. Am I destined to be alone? I have thought about these questions a thousand times but I still cannot seem to find my answer.
A sound makes my ears perk up and my eyes shoot open looking straight at the trees and widen when I catch hold of Deimos. He runs straight into pack grounds shifting from wolf to human while grabbing his shorts off the trunk and putting them on. Lifting his head to the sky he does the same as I did, taking a deep breath in enjoying the soothing scent of nature. We are similar in this way I presume. Slowly opening his eyes he looks straight into mine. I do not look away from him, rather I hold them right where they are. We are looking at each other after quite a while.
What does he see when he looks at me? Does he wish it was Theia in my place? We do not move, just look into the eyes of each other. He watches me with his serious gaze while I wonder what my eyes show to him. Our intense bond is broken by Theia’s entrance as she carries a towel while strolling towards him in fast steps. Handing it to him with a gentle smile, he takes it and once more turns his attention to me while she speaks to him of something I cannot hear. My eyes begin to sting with the picture in front of me, while he watches me. No, while he observes me. I do not wish to give him the satisfaction and walk back into my room closing the curtains.
Not wanting to spend another minute wallowing in my self-pity. I walk to where my females often sit, I need to distract my mind. Books don’t seem to be helping me anymore. Elriam breaks into a sprint as soon as I am within her view, touching our foreheads together we say our feelings without the need for words. Our very own connection. Sitting with my females, my time seems to pass by without any problems clearing my mind of painful thoughts for a while.
Our chatter is interrupted by Ragon who walks towards us with a gentle look on his face as he regards me. “Forgive me Luna, but you all are requested to come to the main gates. We are welcoming someone today.” He bows as he speaks.
“And who is this someone? Another female of Deimos?” I am pretty sure the bitterness could be felt in my voice by every wolf. The chatter dies further to my question until we are completely enveloped by silence. Ragon’s eyes sadden as he regards me once more.
“No, Luna.” He whispers to me in a gentle tone like soothing a pup.
“Very well, let’s go then.” Walking in front of him while my females follow me I feel like we are all heading to some sort of war. Of course, Deimos is already there with his worthy female stuck to his side. I watch as Theia jumps up and down holding Deimos’s shirt showing her excitement.
Walking towards them with confidence, I stand far-right from Deimos with my females behind me. The whole pack quietens to my action. Looking towards his way I wonder if this is how it’s supposed to be. Deimos with the female he finds worthy by his side and me on the opposite alone but strong with my females. Can he see the invisible line between us?
He opens his mouth to say something, perhaps demand that I stand next to him. But it’s just for show, he needs to portray to his pack that we are happy and strong together. As if the pack doesn’t already know the weakness we possess with his daily indulgence with that female. I wish to laugh out loud at his face.
However, before he could order me a sleek silver car pulls in with a roar. As the doors lift giving way to the seats, a male leaps out with one stride. A scarf covers his face while he wears fur across his shoulders and I can only see his eyes. Theia leaves Deimos’s side and runs into the male’s arms. What is it with this female and jumping into the male’s arms?
He hugs her swinging her around with a hearty laugh and walks into the pack gates where Deimos shows his welcome. The trio all laugh together while all I can be is curious about this male, for I can only see the broadness of his back and saw the green of his eyes, just like what Deimos possesses.
The male begins to remove his scarf slowly revealing the blonde of his hair. Deimos calls out to me and as I begin to walk up to them the male turns backwards, looking straight at me showing me all his features. From his thick eyebrows drawn down in a curious gaze to his tattoos that went in the middle of his forehead and below his eyes. (A/N The picture above is the scene she witnesses when he turns around.)
He is beautiful, is all I can think. No one can be compared to that Deimos but I am impressed by this male. Reaching them Deimos glances at me and back to him before introducing me. “This is my mate,” Deimos says to the male. He says nothing but just keeps on looking at me without making a single noise. His intense stare makes a blush creeps up my cheeks. Deimos clears his throat removing the male from his haze.
“Then you must be called Luna, I am Cronus.” He tells me in a gentle tone with a small bow still keeping his eyes on me. His voice pulls me into a trance, such a unique voice he possesses deep but also high pitched, I like it.
Smiling I reply to him. “Welcome, Cronus. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” I tell him my greetings.
Returning my smile with his own he whispers, “Likewise, Luna.”
Deimos interrupts our introduction dragging Cronus to acknowledge the other pack members. While the wolves walk forward with their backs to me as I stand at the gates alone, Cronus slowly turns back meeting my gaze with his lips tilting into a smile. I cannot help but feel that this is some sort of a new beginning.
My sleep is taken over by thoughts of Cronus. Who is that male and what kind of relationship does he have with Deimos and Theia? And why do I keep feeling an urge to ask him plenty of questions?
Waking up the next day morning heading to the packhouse for breakfast I sit next to Deimos without acknowledging him rather glancing around searching for that male, searching for Cronus. Looking to the end of the dining table I meet eyes with Cronus. He was already looking at me. I do not understand why but I feel an urge to be closer to him, my wolf is trying to tell me something but I cannot understand.
Deimos shifts at my side trying to touch me but I move away from him, I feel uncomfortable with his touch. Both Cronus and Deimos notice this. Deimos looks to where my eyes are and a small growl rumbles through his chest. “What do you think you are doing mate?” He demands an answer.
“Nothing that concerns you.” I keep my answer short and straight, I have no words for this male.
“Do not disrespect me. I will show you your place even if it means doing it right here and now.” His voice growing louder by the second.
Dropping the cutlery on the plate with a loud clang I look deep into his eyes while I whisper to him my pain. “I have no place here.” Losing my appetite I get up and walk out the dining room to the pack grounds desperate for fresh air, desperate to just breathe. Sometimes my heartache is too much to handle I shift to my wolf as she is stronger and handles it on my behalf. You cannot control your heart. But you can fight it.
I didn’t notice Deimos was standing behind me until I took a whiff of his scent. I stand quietly watching the pups play until he comes and stands by my side. I know he is watching me but I say no words, enjoying the quietness between us. Quietness is better than tension, pain and anger as those seem to be the only emotions that go around between us. As he moves closer to me, I move to the side away from him.
“Keep your distance, Deimos,” I warn him without looking at him.
“And why must I do what you ask of me, mate?” He questions my warning.
“I smell that female all over you. Unless you don’t want me to go back in there and rip her throat out, stay away.” I warn him further, this is the truth. My wolf wants her blood. Clearing his throat he steps away crossing his hands behind his back.
“What you said back there, in the dining hall. What did you mean by that?” He questions me further.
“I meant what I said.” My voice is cold and unemotional.
“You do have a place here, mate.” A loud sarcastic laugh bubbles through my throat to his comment.
“And what is that? To bear you pups? Or to be one of the females you would feel utmost pleasure when you fuck?” I can taste the bitterness dripping through my tone. He scrunches to my crude words but says nothing to correct them.
“You were destined to rule by my side, that is your place.” He tells me his truth.
“That’s where you are wrong Deimos, so very wrong. I was destined for something else but until you realize that, you and I will never be.” Leaving him with those words turning my back to him searching for some positive energy to envelope me. I head on to the training ground. Stretching preparing for the intensive training not failing to notice Cronus jogging towards the training ground, sweat covering his muscled chest earning lustful looks from all unmated wolves. He was quite the sight to see, I won’t disagree with that.
But an even more mouthwatering sight would be Deimos. His body is perfection, sculpted to be the best. To be something I cannot take my eyes off, to be something I cannot have but only dream of. Once the wolves are settled the training begins however for me I cannot seem to concentrate as I feel the weight of two pair of eyes on me. What is wrong with those two males? Throughout the training, my body turns cold trying to fight the heat of their gazes. Fire and Ice.
Later that evening, wolves gather for a campfire. Soft calming music flows through while the stars shine bright high in the sky. It’s something I have always wanted to experience back when I was in my pack and now that I get to experience it, makes me feel happy. Sitting by the logs roasting a marshmallow, my lips curve into a soft smile. This was my dream as a pup, to roast marshmallows and have my fill to my heart’s content.
Looking towards the other campfire circle to my right I see wolves cuddled up with their mates and pups under the blankets filling each other with warmth. Someday perhaps I can have this and if not at least I shall make it come true in my dreams.
Deimos watches where I am looking and his eyes show understanding of what I am longing for. As he begins his stride towards me, Cronus cuts through his track strolling to me with his hands in his pockets, making Deimos halt and return to his seat. Cronus sits next to me with a huge smile as he greets me.
“Luna.” His greeting short and simple.
“Hello, Cronus.” I smile in return.
“Why aren’t sitting with the pack?” He questions me gently.
“I prefer being alone,” I say shrugging my shoulders, slowly chewing on the candy enjoying its soft sweet taste.
“Lies, Luna. No one prefers to be alone.” This male is not one without a brain.
“Maybe, maybe not. I have questions for you, Conus” I tell him straight away.
“Ask away, Luna.” He replies without thinking twice.
“Who are you?” I ask him directly with no hesitation. Finally, I can get the answer to appease my curiosity that desperately needs to be put down.
“I am the Moon Goddess, my child. How can you not know this, my daughter?” he replies. I tilt my head to the side not understanding what he means. Cronus bursts out laughing at the same time trying to reign it in so he can speak properly. “It’s a joke, Luna. A joke!” He says between chuckles.
When he sees that I finally understand he relaxes. “I am Theia’s older brother, Theia and I are Deimos’s childhood friends.” My eyes widen at his answer, how couldn’t I realize this, Theia and Cronus looked alike. Our chatter quietens until we are surrounded by a comfortable silence roasting marshmallows. Until I ask him what I have been wanting to for the whole day.
“What was your first impression of me when you first saw me and when you came to know I was your childhood friend’s mate?” I don’t know why but I kept feeling an urge to ask him this.
Placing his elbows on the logs stretching his legs forward he looks up at the sky answering my question. “I thought… she is beautiful.” My eyes widen to his answer. He thought exactly what I thought of him when I first saw him. Wait… he thinks I am beautiful? Me? Looking back at me and into my eyes he continues, “But that’s not the only thing I thought. When I came to know you were Deimos’s mate I thought…..” I struggled to breathe after his last words to me.
“I thought the moon goddess can make mistakes too.”