Avalyn
I extended my arm to search for Nikolai and found the mattress cold and empty.
I opened my eyes. Where the hell is he?
Is he gone?
A cold feeling slithered in my heart.
No. No, he won’t do that. He loves me.
He didn’t say it last night…
But he said that he had forgiven me.
I tried to reach his link but it was shut tight. I’ll talk to him soon just to be sure. I know he is very busy with everything going on in the pack. But it would have been nice to wake up in his arms after so long.
Sighing, I stood up and stretched. For once, I was actually hungry. And I needed to breathe fresh air. The room had a thick smell of us and sex.
I went to the window and slid open the heavy curtains and then the windows, taking a deep breath of fresh air.
The sun was setting down which made me realise that half of the day was over.
I need a shower.
I turned around to walked towards the bathroom.
And that’s when I saw him. An ear piercing scream ripped out of my throat. I immediately covered myself up with the curtains.
It was Gabriel. Disfigured, but it was him.
He was kneeling in the shadows of the room, almost invisible. I couldn’t hear his heartbeat or smell him. But he was here. Definitely alive- he was blinking.
Both his eyes were swollen, his face was swollen and his nose was definitely broken, it was twisted in a weird angle. I don’t even know how he was breathing right now. His body looked weak and frail. He was practically a skeleton. There were multiple marks on his body from multiple wounds. I could see a couple of his ribs were broken too…
What the hell happened to him? Hadn’t he left…?
Did… did Nik do this?
Tears rose in my eyes. My throat burned. Why would he do it? Gabe was innocent. It wasn’t his fault that we were mates…
Could Nik actually do it?
Could he actually hurt people so bad?
I remembered Emilio and Emmanuel. And then I realised, yes. Yes, he could.
They deserved it but it showed what Nikolai was truly capable of.
My heart ached as I saw Gabe kneel in the corner, his eyes fixated on the bed.
He was wearing the Taafiete collar.
Which means… Nik had held him captive all this time…
And he was here right now…
He was here all morning and afternoon…
He had seen us together…
It was all for show…
He wanted to punish both of us. What better way to do that than this?
I used my powers and made sure I was clean and clothes and the room smelled fresh.
I walked in Gabe’s line of sight. Tears rose in both our eyes when our eyes met.
I didn’t love him, not like I loved Nikolai. But I cared for him a lot.
He didn’t deserve this.
“I’m so sorry.” I whispered, tears falling down my cheeks freely.
Tears that had welled up in his eyes fell down too. But he didn’t move. He didn’t speak.
I don’t think he could.
But he deserved an apology.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know…” Nikolai got the revenge he wanted. He broke my heart. This hurt more than all the times he hurt me and touched that slave. “I promise I’ll get you out of here.” I sobbed and covered my face with my hands.
How could I have not known?
How did this happen?
This is so messed up.
Nik broke my trust.
I thought that our moments were special. I thought he meant what he said. But it was all a game to him.
He had developed a hobby of finding ways to hurt me.
I searched the entire room for the ring but I couldn’t find it anywhere. I wracked my brain to remember if he was wearing it but I couldn’t remember. But I don’t think he was…
I closed my eyes and healed Gabe. His eyes were closed but I could feel his gratitude.
I searched the room once again, just to be sure. I couldn’t see anything too clearly because I was bawling my eyes out and the tears made them blurry again and again.
And then suddenly, an idea popped in my mind and I checked underneath the mattress.
And there it was.
I wore the ring. “You are free to do as you wish.” I whispered and unlocked the collar quickly.
It slipped past my fingers and clattered on the ground.
Gabriel stood up. “I used to respect you so much, Avalyn.” His voice was hoarse. “But… seeing you with him broke my heart. He isn’t what you think he is…” his voice grew rough.
“I’m so sorry.” I sobbed.
“No you’re not. If you are anything, then you are a desperate whore.” He hissed, shocking me with his words.
I stumbled back and my heart filled with more pain.
“I wish you weren’t my mate.” And then he spread his wings and flew out of the bedroom, leaving me cold, alone and in pain.
I think I’m fated to care for people who love to hurt me.
I don’t even know what to say to Nikolai. I don’t know how to meet his eye. What will I tell him? Congratulations for making me feel like a fool again? Congratulations, you succeeded in hurting me?
Maybe I deserved it. I had made him go through a similar thing after all. But the difference was in our intention. I didn’t mean to hurt him. I didn’t know what I was doing. I still didn’t know why I allowed Gab to touch me that day. It was a mistake.
But this wasn’t. It was all intentional.
I walked out of the bedroom.
I can’t stand this place anymore.
Nikolai has crossed all limits. He told me he had forgiven me. He didn’t just fuck me, he made love to me. He said sweet words, he laughed with me, he took care of me…
He didn’t say he loved me.
That’s when I realised, he had lied to me. He had built up my hopes so I come crashing down when I see Gabriel. That’s why he left. He didn’t want to deal with me.
He wanted me to suffer alone.
I sat on Eli’s bed my hands covering my face and my elbows on my knees.
I felt like a huge hypocrite. I had done the same thing to him after all. But I couldn’t take it anymore. It really felt like he didn’t care.
When did things get so messed up between us?
I deserved better than this. He deserved better than me too. I had hurt him much more than he had hurt me. I had been much more rude to him than he had been to me.
But this was toxic.
I couldn’t go on like this anymore.
I refused to set such an example for my children. I had to be better. For me. For them. For this kingdom. And I needed to make a choice for my future. I had to do the right thing.
But what even is the right thing?
“Mama?” Viktoria called me.
I raised my head to see that her head was peaking in and she was looking at me shyly.
I quickly wiped my tears and pasted a smile on my face. “Yes, Baby?”
“Why are you sad, Mama?” Tears rose in her eyes. “Is it because of Dadda?”
I couldn’t control it anymore. I began crying again.
She came and hugged me. Klaus, who must have been with her came in and hugged me too. I wrapped my arms around both my kids and cried.
“Please don’t cry, Mama.” Tori cried in my neck. “I like Dadda but I like you more. I don’t want him if he makes you sad, Mama.”
Her words broke my heart.
“Let’s leave, Mama.” Klaus whispered. “You, me and Tori. We can go anywhere. Away from here. You won’t have to see that man again. No one will make you cry. I promise. I’ll keep you safe too.”
The dagger twisted in my heart.
They cared about me so much. No one cared about me as much as them. It was love in the purest form.
They are the only ones who haven’t hurt me. They are the only ones who truly care for me. They are mine. My blood. I carried them in my belly. I raised them by myself.
Everyone else in this palace is Nik’s. They are his family, his people. Not mine.
The twin’s arms tightened around me as I cried harder.
And then, I made my decision.
I closed my eyes.
I accepted Nikolai’s rejection.
It hurt. But I knew I’ll be fine. I need to stay strong for my kids.
“Am I interrupting something?” My eyes opened when I heard Eli’s voice.
I patted my kids. “I feel much better now, thank you.”
“Are you sure?” They asked in sync.
“Yes.” I replied.
I stood straight once they released me and looked at Eli. “Pack your bags. We are leaving. Call Tessa too. Tell her to help me pack Tori and Klaus’s stuff too.”
“It’s not safe to step out of this palace.” He shook his head.
“I’m in more of a danger if I stay here. Please, Eli. I’ll break if I see him again. I have finally gathered the courage to do the thing I should have done long ago.”
He held my eye before he nodded. “I’ll take care of everything. Go pack your bags.”